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tv   The Daily Show With Jon Stewart  Comedy Central  September 30, 2011 6:00pm-6:30pm PDT

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right in the nuts! ♪ you and me, girl, it's forever ♪ ♪ sha-la la-la-la ♪ you and me, girl, forever and ever ♪ ♪ you and me forever and ever ♪ ♪ sha-la la-la-la ♪ you and me forever and ever ♪ ♪ sha-la la-la-la -- captions by vitac -- captions paid for by mtv networks >> september 29, 2011, from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is is the "daily show" with jon stewart ( cheers and applause ) captioning sponsored by comedy central >> jon: welcome to the "nesn daily" show." my name is jon stewart. we have a good one tonight, the great, the great, the legendary-- you can't say this about anybody else-- tony bennett is going to be joining
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us ( cheers and applause ) top story tonight, though, democracy! on the lurch. it's the news everybody's talking about. america's great ally and favorite romantic stroll partner, saudi arabia, is holding museuholding municipal s today. today. and the big news from the election, no, no, not the surprising strength of the jeddah city council elections. (laughter) i tried to say that right. it's this bombshell announcement. >> the seismic shift in saudi arabia, king adbullah announced women will now be allowed to vote and run for office. >> jon: yes! ( cheers and applause ) nothing says democracy like a royal decree.
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( laughter ) but still today, thursday, september 29, saudi women, participating in municipal elections for the very first time. >> the king said that women could participate in future municipal elections. >> in the next municipal elections in 2015. >> jon: hey, 2011, 2015. what's four years when you're finally getting a chance to vote. >> there are people that are wondering if exactly that means they would precisely be able to vote. he didn't specifically say the word "vote." ( laughter ) >> jon: still, uh, participation. women can participate. there are still going to be great opportunities for saudi women to hand out flyers or be
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the voting booth. ( laughter ) ( applause ) of course, in the interim, saudi arabiaian women do still face some minor restriction. >> they aren't allowed to travel abroad without first getting permission from a male guardian. >> women can't go to school without a male sham rope. >> can't leave the without without being fully covered and accompanied by a male guardian. >> jon: must get weird at bachelorette parties. ( laughter ) chaperones are probably sitting there the whole time like... can we leave yet? all right, so there are some minor, seemingly archaic policies towards women in saudi arabia. like our blue laws. they're on the bookes, seldom enforced, nod, nod, wink, wink.
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>> a saudi woman sentenced to 10 lashes for driving a car. >> jon: that's (beep) up ( applause ) why do we let-- why do we let saudi arabia get away with this stuff? how can we put up with them denying women basic human rights and still call them-- wait a minute-- allies and all that. i just-- why can we-- how can we did that and still-- i can't stay mad at you. ( laughter ) that was weird. all right. of course, it's overseas. democracy overseas can be a little messy. it's new. here, america, the cradle of
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liberty, we're long past those fits and starts. what the ( bleep ) was that all about? ( laughter ) what happened? did those ladies try and drive? what? that's here in america? apparently, that footage came from the march on wall street this past saturday during an ongoing demonstration called, oddly enough, occupy wall street. >> this is what democracy looks like. ( laughter ) >> jon: all right, i guess that is what democracy look look likees, although, to be fair, it's what bonaru looks like. wait a minute, young, idealistic protesters, rhythmic drumming, the bright lights of media attention. why, that's the mating call of
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the green-capped michiganian warbler. yes, like a moth to a flame. director chair michael moore let lawrence o'donnell know this protest wasn't about him. >> there's no one person that comes in here and says, "now, this is our agenda and this is the way it's going to be." there are-- there are a variety of demands, and-- and concerns within this group. >> jon: some want to reform the system of economic justice. some have an issue with our policy towards israel. one girl over there is dressed like a ( bleep ) coin. i don't really know what that's can about. i guess she's taking on some type of pro or anti-change position. still, agree or disagree, or not know the protesters' goals or message. one thing all people can agree on is at least one reaction to the movement was unacceptable.
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>> video has surfaced of a police officer using pepper spray on women during that standoff saturday. >> there were five young women on a sidewalk standing there who were contained in a pen, an orange plastic pen, just observing the protest on the sidewalk. >> the police commander using pepper spray against some young women. >> jon: all right, that looks bad. but maybe that cop had a good reason to use a blinding, stinging chemical on five apparently already penned in women and what looks like his fellow officers who were surrounding them. maybe the pepper spray was a mistake. it was a hot day. maybe that officer was reaching for his canister of cooling cucumber mist spray ( laughter ) and grabbed the pepper spray by accident. i'm sure if we just filmed him later-- >> jon: ( bleep )!
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he sprayed the cam ronow! i'm starting to think this guy doesn't even have cucumber mist spray ( laughter ) so who exactly was this human cropduster raining habanero misery on the crowd? >> we now know his name and rank. the "new york times" has confirmed that the out-of-control officer is the high-ranking deputy inspector anthony baloania. ( laughter ) come on ( applause ). come on. anthony balogna. ( laughter ) you and i both know that guy's name is tony baloney ( laughter ) ( applause ) you and i know. you're not fooling anybody. tony baloney. the guy's name is tony baloney. favorite pasta, rigatoni. favorite island, coney. firefighter italian prime
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minister, berlusconi. favorite restaurant, shoney's. favorite dessert, freshed mixed berries. you thought i'd say spumoni or tortoni. no, he's lactose intolaroni. this gives me an idea. this tony baloney is a television series waiting to happen ( laughter ) and i'm about to happen it. >> in a city gone mad, tony baloney was the fine mist of the law. but then he went too far. >> you pepper sprayed five ladies in the face? >> i got results. >> you're a loose nozzle, baloney. turn in your badge. and your spray can. all of it.
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>> lucky for new york, bilini doesn't need a badge. >> it's baloney, chief. he's gone rogue. >> that's bad news, no matter how you splice it. >> aahh! >> maybe you're right. >> this fall, justice has a first name. it's spelled t-o-n-y. and it's gonna burn. chris baloney is tony baloney in
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"the vigaloni." >> jon: we'll be right
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( cheers and applause ). >> jon: welcome back. as you know, as you know, when barack obama was elected president, one group in particular very concerned. >> while the results of tuesday's election led to celebrations in some part of the country, this otheres, there's
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been a boom in gun sales. >> i honestly believe these going to put an end to certain types of weapons. >> election day, people wake up thinking, obama won. they're going to take our guns away tomorrow. >> jon: tomorrow? ( laughter ) he's a president. he's not magneto. ( laughter ) even he was magneto, there's no way to really differentiate between guns and posters. anyway, things didn't quite turn out that way. >> sense the president took office, he has actually signed bills loosening gun control, including allowing guns to be carried in national parks and in luggage on amtrak trains. >> so far the only gun legislation the president has signed are laws the n.r.a. actually wanted. >> the president's record on guns has earned him straight "fs" from the brady campaign to prevent gun violence. >> jon: ha!
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the joke's on you, brady campaign, because he got "fs," that means he's going to have to repeat his first term. obama's given everything the n.r.a. could have wanted. that ought to make their c.e.o., wayne lapierre, a pretty happy man. >> it's a big, fat, stinkin lie. it's all part of a massive obama conspiracy to deceive voters and hide his true intentions to destroy the second amendment in our country. >> jon: go on? >> that's their agenda. if anyone doubts that, think. use your common sense ( laughter ) >> jon: or use mine-- i'm clearly not using it. ( laughter ) it's just sitting in my brain collecting dust. barack obama's been good to the n.r.a., but for lapierre, if you
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want to take away his preconceived narrative, you have to pry it from his cold, dead, hands. >> before the president was even sworn into office, they met and they had the conspiracy of public deception to try to guarantee his reelection in 2012. they concocked a scheme to stay away from the gun issue, lull gun owners to sleep and play us for fools in 2012. >> jon: barack obama will court his liberal base by running on change, get elected, fail to deliver the change with a congress from his same party, thus alienating that base in an attempt to win over the people that hate him no matter what, ensuring his victory in 2012, where he is & a congress from the opposing party can finally
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take away all your guns. ( laughter ) it's just so crazy, it's ( bleep ) crazy. ( applause ) we'll be right back.
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( cheers and applause ) >> jon: my guest tonight, legendary performer. he's won 15 grammys. his new album is called "diddid youets 2." please welcome to the program, tony bennett ( cheers and applause ) ♪ ♪. >> thank you. wow. >> jon: look at you! look at you! you look great. thanks for coming to see us. >> oh, i love it. thank you. >> jon: this-- this "did youets two" i just want to say right here, "tony bennett: did youets two," the number one album in the country, am i correct?
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>> yes. >> jon: number one album ( cheers and applause ) is there any other performer you can think of that has been on the charts-- when did you first start charting, 50s? >> in the 50s, yes. >> jon: the 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s. you've been on the charts every decade. >> right. >> jon: is there anybody else in history, other than like beethoven, is there anybody that has that type of record that you know of? would you even-- would you follow that? >> i think it's the first. >> jon: it's unbelievable. it's a remarkable thing. now, you have-- these are-- how many duets? >> about 19. >> jon: 19. who sucked? who was terrible? ( laughter ) >> they were all wonderful. really, i really mean it. they were all great. >> jon: no, i know. this is really nice. >> these are the most important, most popular young artists today that are doing very well. >> jon: and they're-- is there anybody that wouldn't? because i can't imagine-- if
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tony bennett calls you and says, "hey, man, you want to sing a song," i would think it was the honor of their years? >> well, i must say, my son is my wonderful manager for last 45 years, and he came up with this whole premise and i want to thank him for doing that. >> jon: that's danny. a good man, very nice guy. >> thank you. >> jon: he will, though, because i've worked with him before, getting you to do gigs, he will muffle you ( laughter ) he can be a vicious man. ( laughter ) what was it like, you know, you did a duet with amy wine house. >> right. >> jon: were you in the studio with her? >> i was. abbey road in britain. and was it was the last record that she made, yes. >> jon: is that-- is it-- is it-- when you're working with somebody in that situation-- and, look, let's not be naive. you've been working in the industry since the 50s. you've seen people struggle. you've unfortunately seen people die too young.
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is that something that you feel from a performer or is it all just business? do you get a sense that there's-- that there's trouble there? >> well, she was in trouble at that time because she had a couple of engagements that she didn't keep up, but what people didn't realize at that time, that she really knew-- in fact, i didn't even know it when we were make the record and now looking at the whole thing-- she knew that she was in a lot of trouble, that she wasn't going to live. >> jon: wow. >> you know. and it wasn't drugs. it was-- it was alcohol. >> jon: right. >> toward the end, you know. and it was-- it was such a sad thing because she was really-- since elvis presley and the beatles and the rolling stones and the whole contemporary change that came in, she was the only singer that really sang what i call the right way. >> jon: really? >> yeah, because she's-- she was
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a great jazz pop singer, and she was a little apprehensive about the whole thing when we were doing the record, but i-- i came up with one sentence that made everything work. and i just said, "you know," i said, "i may be wrong but i bet you're influenced by dinah washington." and when she heard that, she said, "oh, my god. that's my god. that's who i love." and it really changed the whole record, and she actually used some dinah washington phrases in the recording and the-- you could tell when you hear the record how wonderful she-- she was really a great jazz singer, a true jazz singer. and that-- i regret that because that's the right way to sing. >> jon: right. and you-- in your-- you really are intuitive now about the music, aren't you? like you can just feel it from people. you've done it long enough that
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know-- will you see an artist sometimes on television, or you'll hear them, and you'll go, that's somebody i'll click with or can you hear somebody's phrasing and think not sure i can blend that. can you feel the ingredient that will work with you that will make a great record? >> to answer your question here, you know, i was 10 years younger than the great master frank sinatra, nat king cole, and billy epstein, and sarah vaughn, and ella fitzgerald, who is better than anybody, and then louis armstrong. so i grew up loving that period of time. it doesn't sound dated to me. any of the recordings, even today when you hear a nat cole record, it doesn't sound old fashioned, you know. so corporations will say, well, that's old music." but to me it's not. it's going to last forever. sinatra, ella fitzgerald, louis armstrong, is going to sound
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great 50 gears now. >> jon: you know who else? >> well, they were my masters ( cheers and applause ) >> jon: i'm telling you, man. when you came out for us-- when you came out forinous washington, i'm telling you, there was only one person i wanted at the end there standing up at the capitol singing to those people and you just-- you exceeded expecting as, as you always do. it's just an honor to see you. >> that was the most beautiful moment in my life because to sing "america the beautiful" right there with the capitol behind us and the flag. >> jon: it was something, baby. >> thank you. >> jon: thank you ( cheers and applause ) "tony bennett: did youets two." it's available everywhere. get it. the great tony bennett. ( cheers and applause ) ♪
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