tv The Daily Show With Trevor Noah Comedy Central December 8, 2020 1:14am-2:00am PST
mofneds on this flower shaped ring dubbed the mari gold or ring of pros pitter. the reef record was set with 7800 diamonds. >> trevor: oo ow ee, that wing has almost sp,000 diamonds? that is the kind of gift you get your wife if she caught you cheating with every person she has ever met in her life. all right, so that diamond is for your best friend. and that diamond is for your sister. and that big one, that diamond is for the time with your dad. >> you slept with my dad? >> baby, you see the diamonds, don't you? >> now look, i'm sorry but i don't think this should count for record number of diamonds on a ring because that thing is not a ring, all right, that is a handsome brero. can't say something say ring because you can put your finger in t i can't put my hand in the muffler of a lamborghini and say look at my fancy ring. the weird thing about this ring is on the one hand, yes you probably want to wear it the most glamorous party in the world.
but on the other hand you probably want to wear it oy bar fight because one punch with that, your enemy is dead. basically brass knuckles but for the red carpet. >> oh, you want to step to me meryl, i will take you down, meryl. you not winning this year. i mean certificate countriesly-- dispsh seriously, what do you even do with that ring. it's too rich for any event. there is no event glamorous-- like the only event glamorous enough to wear that ring would be like if there was a wedding between i don't know, the pope and queen elizabeth. and that is not going to happen unless the queen sowt walking her corgi one day, and it breaks loose from the leash and the pope is on the other side of the road figuring his pope mobile and the corgi runs up to the pope, when the queen catches up to the dog, the pope is sharing his sandwich with it. that would be an amazing romantic comedy, you know. this summer frankie is breaking one vow for another. but let's make a fugitive and move on to mexico stvment like canada but with hot sauce. over the years mexico has become synonymous with drug car tells
and the-- cartels and the lengths they approximate will go to stay in power but now it looks like they traded their triggers for tiktok. >> tiktok algorithm made many things go viral to the latest dance craze, fun editing software and laugh out loud memes but one disturbing trend surfacing is cartel contacts, experts are saying many clips are glam orizing drug culture especially where the murder rate in mexico is supposed to reach an all-time high. >> there are a lot of criminal organizations, in the past they used to show clips of vy long like murders, and they chnged their strategy to show more glarymous flashy things and luxurious lifestyles making it a little more appealing to the youth. >> trevor: yeah, of course the luxury lifestyle are going to be more appealing than showing murders. >> but at some point you are
going to have to tell the recruits what their real job is. >> all right dude, thanks so much for letting me sign up to the sinaloa cartel. so when do we do the party boat. >> first things first. you have to chop off that man's head. >> okay. and then the party boat afterwards. >> we'll see if there is time. but yo, this story should not be a surprised. this is what happens with every social media app. first people use it to connect with people and have fun. then creepy men use it to send dick picks then it becomes a recruitment tool for extremists and criminals and finally they promise to fix the platform but they just end up adding a stories function and we're all like yay. by the way, you can imagine the pressure of being the sinaloa cartel's social media guy? hey, everyone, please like and subscribe. seriously, like and subscribing, they are mi family, man. >> i don't think anything is going to change here. and you know what, i think cartels getting on social media
is a good idea, i know, i know, hear me out. because it might get the cartels out of the drug game and into the sponsored content game. just going to be having meetings like oh, patron, we ready to smuggle the rest of that cocaine across the border. >> are you crazy, and lose our deal with frenchie? never. now of course there is really only one-story that everyone is talking about, all over the world. covid-19. and yes, it's still real, even though people are all sick of talking about it. like how white people feel about racism. now there are some places in the world where the coronavirus situation is improving. yeah, great news. australia celebrated today as freedom day when restrictions in most parts of the country were lifted for the first time in months. and now most of their success have been attributed to stopping interstate travel. unlike the u.s. where they shut down schools in new york but then allow people to travel to miami, lick stranger's faces in the club and then come back. in europe, france and germany
have announced that they are expanding their lockdowns as cases have continued to surge. in fact, it's gotten so bad that even sweden is now on lockdown after admitting that its hands-off approach didn't work. this whole time, they were telling the world, we trust our people to make the right decisions for themselves and corona was like-- i also try to tell people to make the right decision for me. >> as for here in the united states, covid-19 has finally strurk its least surprising victim yet. >> the coronavirus has again hit president trump's innercircle. this time st his personal attorney rudy giuliani who was admitted yesterday to georgetown university medical center in washington. >> rudy giuliani appeared on television sunday morning claiming president trump's fight to overturn the election results was making progress. jis hours later the president revealed that giuliani tested positive for covid-19. he spoke in arizona, georgia and
michigan, often without covering his face. >> i don't want to you do this if you feel uncomfortable. but would you be comfortable taking your mask off so people could hear you more clearly. >> can you hear me now? >> man, that woman did not want to take off her mask. you see her? she was like moth-- can i see the corona on you, get out of here with that shit. so yes, rudy giuliani has tested positive for the clove. -- coronavirus. although he is suing to have that result overturned but for now it doesn't look good. and the truth is that rudy has only got himself to blame for this. i mean this dude was going all over the country, refusing to wear a mask. what do you expect. if i go around licking car windshields i can't be shocked in i get bird flu or if i go around driking at bars until 3 a.m. i can't be surprised when gi home with yo mama. oh! and as much as you might have some-- about this thing, rudy giuliani testing positive for
covid-19 is a terrifying new development. because you realize up until now we didn't even think that dead guys could get corona. but look, we all wish rudy giuliani a speedy recovery. i want him to get back to the days when his hair was melting off his head. nobody wants to make jokes about rudy having a deadly disease. what we want is to make jokes about how rudy farted on camera at an election hearing like full on trumpet blast t happened in michigan on wednesday, i'm pretty sure will you hear it. but you will desm know it the moment when it happens, by watching the face of the woman sitting next to him. >> i'm just hoping to get an answer to the other question about mr. barr and others who have dn-- representative. >> i gave you the answer, the answer that i gave you was they didn't bother to interview a single witness, just like you, they don't want to know the truth. well, you probably know the truth, i'm worried about their not wanting to know the truth. >> trevor: (laughter)
oh man, the look, the look that she gave him. you know that look she gave him like i knew i should have worn a face mask around you you smelly bitch and it was so ud lo. it sounded like his butt was demanding a recount of his lunch. although to be fair that part is no worse than any of the other legal article arguements the trump campaign has made so far. the best part was part of the strategy. everyone in the room going to be like oh god, oh, trump is president forever, just don't do that again, trump is president forever. and before you say no, trevor, it's never good to fart during a dramatic hearing, let me remind you that it works in all the best court room dramas. >> you want answers. >> i want the truth. >> you can't handle the truth. >> . (fart sound (. >> cinematic genius. we're going to take a quick break. but when we come back we'll talk
(on me) yeah, your grandmama probably know me (know me) it's a moment when i show up, got 'em sayin', "wow" new doritos flamin' hot limon. been there, done that. twice your cousin. from boston. karen, i'm just gonna say what everyone here is thinking. you look smokin. total smokeshow. and they never did find his finger. they had to close the pool for like an hour. ♪ i brought a date. name's sam. dig in. love is like boston lager. rich, complex and it's over too soon. right, chrissy? oh my god. ♪
within welcome back to the daily social distancing show. on january 20th joe bieden, the boomer with the gen z teeth will be sworn in as the next president. united states. but weather he will be able to get anything done depends on whether democrats have a majority in the senate. and that depends on what happens
in georgia one month from now. so let's check in on the peach state with a special edition of votegasm 2020, yes, it's still going. >> let's talk about the united states senate. it's the home of the two least intimidating street gangs. and right now the future of the senate is on the line in georgia. where republican incumbents kelly loeffler and david perdue are both facing tough democratic challenges in runoff elections so to give loeffler and perdue a boost the gop is you will approximating out its biggest gun. donald jango fett trump. >> the two runoffs heating up, the control of the senate at stake. president trump hosted an yut door rally in georgia in support of the two republican senators locked in a special election battle. >> the rally in valdosta, georgia, was the first one since the november election. it was very important as
republicans try to keep the senate in their control. >> at the urging of kelly and david, may administration took historic action to protect growers of georgia, blueberries, peppers, squash and cucumbers. who does cucumbers airport here? because i like cucumbers, i'm the only one, i like cucumbers. >> trevor: yo, guys, trump doesn't care any more. he even cares less but he-- he will just say whatever pops into his mind now. who likes cucumbers, who likes cucumbers, i'm the only one. they've got green but it's bumpy, so green, is bumpy like it's got warts. i had a wart once but it got removed. i wanted to put it in a little jar but they wouldn't let me. it would have been my best friend. and look, of course trump loves cucumbers, it is no surprise, yeah, he prefers them pickled and surrounded by a big mac but still, that is a cucumber. clearly dn ald trump is only
limited help but the gop senators haven't been able to help themselves much either. you see both of them, are in hot water over big stock trades that they made during the coronavirus pandemic. and that two debates yesterday neither of them handled the issue well. first of all, senator perdue simply skipped his debate leaving his opponent john ossoff to debate a empty lectern which put extra prerkure onsov because imagine if you lose to a lectern. i guess i don't know, i like the strong silent type. and while loeffler did shoip, after this exchange, she might wish that she hadn't. >> senator t should members of congress be barred from trading stocks? >> look, what is at stake here in this election is the american dream. that's what is under attack. when they attack me for a lie, a left wing media lie, conspired with the democrats by, this is an attack on every single gorge
began who gets up every day to work hard to provide a better life for their family who wants to live the american dream. >> trevor: wow. robot ann coulter nails that. because if you are going to dodge a question, you just pivot to the american dream. she's got to be a roll model for the kids if georgia, billy, did you flush a cherry bomb down the toilet? >> look mr. johnson, what is at stake here is the american dream, that's what we got to be talking about. >> you're rightk billy, you're right. >> and you got to love how shady rich people always try to act like attacking them is attacking everybody. >> if you take away my helicopter parking spot, you're taking helicopter parking spots away from every american in this country. now let's be clear. even though georgia went narrowly for joe biden this area, it is still a very red state. and the republican candidates do have an advantage. but ironically trump might be hurting their chances more than
he helped. >> for republicans looking at georgia there are questions now about whether the president's baseless claims of a stolen election could actually de press turnout for those really important runoffs. >> the president down here, in a crowd that attracted thousands of people, he told them conflicting message, he told them the election is rigged but go out and vote for these two senators, so what message does that leave these loyal supporters with them whip, it leaves them confused. >> this is the kind of thing republicans are concerned about. they are worried the president's message on election fraud can back fire for republicans as he convinces voters it is not worth nair time to cast their ballot on january 5. >> that's right. because they indulge donald trump's bullshit claims of fraud, republicans might have suppressed their vote so much that they could lose their senate majority. in fact, you might say that trump has put republicans in quiept the pickle.
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today jaboukie young-while takes a look back at the year in mix. music, it's like podcasts but with beats, and in the year 2020 when the world was raffaged by the virus. >> music was a place of comfort. >> but that doesn't mean music wasn't effective. >> tours were cancelled. -base players were forced to wash their hands for the first time. even music's biggest award shows were forced to have virtual performances. band members had to play six feet apart. lady gaga was forced to play as dot from the bug's lie, but coronavirus wasn't the only thing tearing america apart in 2020. america had a real racial reckoning. and music artists used their platform to call for change and post little black squares on instagram. but one band in particular. >> recently country band lady
antebellum changing its name to lady a. but in a legal dispute with a black soul artist anita white. >> have i built this name for decades before they were born. and have i been building in, as an independent artist. we grind every day to do what we do. and black folks indigenous people of color, of this land, we grind even harder. >> wow, okay, that is so messed up. first of all,-- second of all, if you're going to actually change your name, change your name. don't just abbreviate the problematic part. like for example, my name used to be tim plantation. but i changed the bad word and %-py honor the struggle gens police brutalit. artists marched in the street of black lives matter or hosted benefit concerts to raise money. but if you ask me the thing that was the greatest support for black lives this kreer was this.
>> this record is in honor of george floyd and i really hope we can see more unity and more peace. so shout out to his family. >> i have a dream. >> of course you can't talk about 2020 without referencing the smash hit wap by cardi b featuring megan. i can't get them it play that song because-- but i was able to get in a studio and record a version of my own that gets the vibe across. >> there is a crow in this blows, are you messing with a wet ass pussy. >> i love that song. i never, i mean never have i ever been so excited to see how kids saw this. >> so much has happened.
what else, what else. beyonce. beyonce released a visual album. it was also a music star baby which means that we're like 20 years out. and taylor swift went. >> taylor swift breaking records with her new album folk lore, the pop artist telling 1.3 million albums in just 24 hours. >> yeah, taylor swift went folk which is not as crazy as people are making it out to be. she started as a country singer. folk singers are just country singers that wear vintage clothing. now what would have been crazy is if taylor ran as can ya's vp. either way, folk lore was one of the biggest albums in 2020 and lead single cardigan was streamed over 7 million times on the day of release. let's take a listen. >> i've got a wet as as pussy, get me a cardigan for this wetted ass pusy.
>> i can't afford the rights to that but st a classic. musicians didn't just give us comfort-- some of them literally helped save lives. >> people on social media unlessed that dolly parton was listed as one of the sponsors of moderna's new coronavirus vaccine in a preliminary report. parton a nonned in april, you may remember, that she was giving a million dollars to vanderbilt university in nashville for covid research. well, some of that money went to an early stage trial of the moderna vaccine. >> yes, dolly parton invented the coronavirus vaccine. which is a crazy prospect. that would be like if dr. fauci dropped an album you know what, to be honest though, i would trust the $ee parton vaccine over a dr. fauci vaccine because dolly parton has been a gay icon for decades, fauci is kind of new. until he is someone's info for the rupaul drag race outfit, he has a lot of work to do. okay. so even though 2020 was a
dumpster fire of a year, i was so entertained by music. and i am very excited to see what 2020-- -- 2021 has. will britney finally be free. will rihanna release an album or just give us another line of things we don't really need. ang will the weekend admit that he is actually just my boss trevor. i'm excited to find out. now play us out, the woman who helped cure coronavirus. dolly parton playing her 1974 hit jolene. jo be-- i got a wet ass pussy. wet ass pussy. ♪ scwhroleven. ksh dpsh scwhroleven. >> trevor: thank you so much for that jaboukie, when we come back, method mad tells us about his brands new marvel podcast and he might give us a spoiler for power book. you don't want to miss it.
imagine how intense this jury selection is going to get. may i suggest some decorup here so that neither of you ends up with a charge or in contempt. >> if the u.s. attorney can remain civil, then so can i. it will be a challenge, your honor, but i will do my best. >> thank you. >> it is about to go down. >> clip methodman smith. >> welcome to the daily social distancing show. >> thank you for having me, mr. noah. >> trevor: o man, this is truly an honor foe me-- for me. i spent many many years of my high school life learning every single lyric of yours. and then you went and abandoned me and became a major acting star. i feel like i'm personally aggrieved. >> well, thank you, sir, thank you. i think the transition has worked for me. and i'm having fun. that's the best thing i can have right now, is fun. >> trevor: you are not just having fun. you are having fun and you are
successful. we have seen you in everything from the deuce all the way through to the best hip-hop videos and movies but fans are loving what are you doing in power book two, talk me through a little bit about why you think this show is sometimes even more popular than the original. >> i think that people were especially after the pandemick people mr. looking for a nice escape. and a lot of people were familiar with the original series, this being a spinoff. and they were excited to see where it was going to go, especially after they killed off the main character in the series finale. >> trevor: right. >> o so it is that along with the anticipation of having a married gay-- mary j bliej in the cast, i think courteney took great advantage of that. and the writing has stepped up. and the character development is key in this whole thing because if people didn't receive the new characters as well, then we done really have a show. and i'm taking hi hat off and
applauding michael right now, for his performance. he is our leading man and we are behind him 110%, brother. >> mary jblige, the queen, just the absolute queen. you two worked together in music such a long time ago. did you ever for a second think that the neck time you would collaborate would be on screen? >>? no, no, honestly. i'm just going to be honest. i thought maybe we would collaborate on maybe more records over the years. >> right, right. >> but on screen, i watched mary's progression over the years and have i to say that she embodies this mondayet character like it was written for her t probably was if you really think about it. but yeah, she is such a boss on this show just like in real life. and i think that people are very intrigued by the tejada family and her being the mat ree arc of that family makes it even more intriguing. >> trevor: one of the things i love about your acting is that in many ways i feel like you've always had the ability to cross
the story through your words and through your expressions and through your vibe. i mean like even in your music, every song that i would listen to, it felt like you were embodying a different character, you know, whether it was the rottweiler or whether the creeping through a back window, silent as a mouse, you know what i mean, you always had that feeling where it was i'm embodying a different character. do you feel like acting has always been in your bones, do you think you have always had the ability to shift seamlessly between different stories that you are telling. >> i think being in entertainment as a whole has prepared me for what i am doing now. especially with the oath that you were speaking of. and you know, i think a lot of it has to do with charm and personality. but the biggest effort in the biggest thing that shows the difference is your dedication to the art form of it. unless you are taking class, you know, you are set on time, ready to work, you know, all that plays a part. and like i say, being on stage in front of 40 to 50,000 people
and entertaining them for an hour, hour and a half. i can pull it off pretty well on a big screen and a small screen as well. >> i mean there was a day when you were trending on sowing media and i was like oh man, what has happened. whatever you see a celebrity's name trending they are like oh man, they died or should wish they died. always one of the two. instead, instead it was method man at 50 laying first tracks that most 22 year olds couldn't dream of achieving. talk me through a little bit about this transformation because your body has gone to another level like i heard you used to play video games and then i was like that is not a video game, and now i heard you made a change in your life and that is why you look the way you do. >> yes, i did make a change in my life. i decided to start to take more care of my body as well as my mind. i felt like if i was going to
improve my mental i might as well improve my tl as well. and yeah, it started with me you know, just binging video games 3, 4:00 in the morning. you know what that feels like, my brother. >> trevor: what did you play. >> it was a lot of call of duty. >> trevor: was what. >> we were kill cop firm, death batch and what is the where you get the points, a, b and c. >> trevor: capture the flag. >> right. and you know, i just started feeling real loserrish, you know. i couldn't go back to sleep, are you on the couch playing video games eating snacks. so i had this gym membership and decided to take advantage of it, and the gym happened to open at 4 a.m. and i haven't looked back since. >> damn, i've got a different technique, i play a ton and then what i do is if i am let's say if i'm playing war zone now and i get a kick to the gull ag
waiting for my team to buy me back, what i will did is i have to do ten burpees or 20 push-ups, every time i respawn i have to do something. i'm not going to go to the gym for hours will you but i will punish myself for not playing well and just feel like i'm moving. i feel like i'm moving. so one of the things that is truly fascinated me about your career, and affected me, i think, is that you upended the idea of what a rapper, and sometimes even a black nan is supposed to be interested in, you know, you are an avid comic book checker. were you somebody who was never afraid to read and expand your mind at a time when oftentimes approximate in hip-hop ignorance was celebrateds alike the be all and end all. but you came from a class and a school where like no, i'm going to be informed. i am going to infuse my hip-hop and work with this, i will be a comic book collect are. there is no nerd title to this, this part of who i am. one of is in a reason you did that or where did you get the confidence to do that in a world and industry that always wanted to put people in one box.
>> well, it's funny. because i am a result of my environment, a product of my environment. and you know, the comic book thing played a major part in my word play because you know, it basically taught me how to read. and some of the words in there you were sporessed to look up in the diction aero, when you couldn't find them you new we were making this shut up. anyway, i mean, it gief me a sense, a moral code as well as you know, a vast vocabulary. especially for writing. and the beauty of, you know, me being black and growing up in these neighborhoods, i could be around some of the toughest guys and they still love thor, the hulk, spiderman, you know, it was never an issue of me being a geek or a nerd. it was just that oh wow, qulo, let me check that book out real fast, so i never had that stigma. so its was never any issue for me to put comic books in the forefront of my rhymes or
lifestyle, you know what i mean. it was just an easy thing for me. very easy. >> trevor: i know you have got a new podcast out where you talk to all kinds of celebrities and comic book geeks and nerds alike. celebrating the art form. talk me through that and what you love about it so much. >> yeah, the marvel method, this was like years in the making in my mind. because i kept pining for, you know, just letting people know my love for comic books and how marvel shaped who i am today. and how it, you know, if really had an affect on my lifestyle as a child. so for these guys to come and offer me a podcast talking about books with people that are in the industry like me. >> yeah. >> that's like the gift that keeps on giving. and i learned so much, correlation between comic books and life with a lot of these stars like who they are today. you can see trk and like i said there is a moral code in these books. admitted or not, that we all live by. we don't kill, we-- it's like
that, you know, we want to see justice. >> right. >> a meap ending and that is what everybody wants in life. so the marvel method, when people tune in, they are going to get more than just us talking shop about the books. they're going to get like a real experience from artist to artist talking about their life. prior to books, and after, and we get to talk with some of the writers which makes it more better. >> i always wanted to know which marvel character would you want to play in a marvel movie. >> well, there are many black characters, shout out to chadwick boseman, beautiful man. wakanda forever, for real. there are many black characters in the mar val university, there are some and i cherish them, don't get me wrong. and i was pining for bishop. x-men, and adam bra shear, the blue marvel. but now it's like i think it's time for new characters frk we can just make new characters
now, we don't have to gender swap. we don't have to race swap, let's bring new characters. >> trevor: so i will ask you this before i let you go. if you were to create any character, what are the powers that you would give that character and why? >> wow, geez, that's a tough one. i, geez, i think he would probably be-- be empath, like we have the power of empathy. and he could reflect that to the world that empathic ability and then he can, with that empathic ability, can cure racism if he wanted to or have peace on earth because he's projecting. all he needs is a big stage, social media, and people to hear his voice. that would be dope. and he could be a vil ann, and-- villain, because there is are a lot poof em that don't
want that message. think about it. >> you know how he gets his powers, he gets his powers because as a little kid he was in a hospital where they were working on his brain and the machine they connected him up to connected him to the other kids by mistake and electrocuted so he got all of their thoughts and feelings inside of him. and that created. >> cocreator rights right there, trevor, you are a genius. thank you. >> trevor: yo, you made my day, man, you made a part of my life, i appreciated you, thank you so much for taking the time. >> thank you trevor, appreciate it. >> don't forget, power book 2, ghost airs sundays on stars, we will take a quick break but we will be right back after this.
that's hour show for tonightk dpu before we go i just wanted to take a moment to ask you please, if you can, support your local restaurant. they are struggling more than ever before right now to stay open during this pandemic which means many people will lose their job if they don't get the help that they need. and they might not be open for you when the pandemic is over, so if you want to help, then please do whatever you can, and if you want to do more, than consider a donation to the james beard foundation's open for good-- for good campaign which helps independent restaurants survive the pandemic and rebuild stronger and more equitiably. until tomorrow, stay safe out there, wear a mask and remember, if you can't smell your own farts, you might have coronavirus. now here st, your moment of zen.
>> from the land of make believe. >> attended iowa state where he secured two ncaa wrestling championships. he won 117 consecutive matches. and lost only one, well, you know in politics, i won two, so i'm 2-and-0. and that is pretty good too. ♪ - ♪ i'm goin' down to south park ♪ ♪ gonna have myself a time - ♪ friendly faces everywhere ♪ humble folks without temptation ♪ - ♪ i'm goin' down to south park ♪ ♪ gonna leave my woes behind - ♪ ample parking day or night, people spouting howdy neighbor ♪ - ♪ headin' on up to south park, gonna see if i can't unwind ♪ - ♪ [muffled] - ♪ come on down to south park and meet some friends of mine ♪
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