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tv   The Daily Show With Trevor Noah  Comedy Central  December 2, 2021 1:15am-2:00am PST

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>> announcer: coming to you from the heart of times square, in new york city, the only city in america, it's "the daily show. tonight: "roe v. wade," aborted. ryan busse, and scottie pippen. this is "the daily show with trevor noah." >> trevor: hey! what's going on, everybody. welcome ba"the daily show." i'm trevor noah, we've got a lot to talk about so let's jump straight into the news. our first story is about abortion. what? no. no, no, no, no. guys i'm not-- i'm not starting the show with the abortion-- what do you mean i have to? it's-- but butt it's my show. i can choose what i want to do. it's my choice. no, i'm not-- it's my show, so-- you know what, i'm not going to start the show. i'm not going to start it on that. you can tell the supreme court i said it upon you tell them! all right, we're going to get to the story of the supreme court, but first, let's warm up with a more fun story. yeah, for years, one of cable
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news' biggest stars has been chris cuomo, cnn anchor and human protein shake. but now, cuomo's network has decided they've had enough of his extracurricular activities. >> cnn has suspended anchor chris cuomo indefinitely. it comes after records showed cuomo took an active role in helping his brother, the former governor of new york, respond to sexual harassment charges. >> text messages and interview transcripts released this week bee the new york attorney general's office, showed chris cuomo helped prepare his brother for press conference, assisted in drafting public statements, and even shareholder a lead on a woman accusing the former governor of inappropriate behavior at a wedding. the documents also reveal chris cuomo offered to use his media sources to find out if more women were coming forward. a top aide texted chris cuomo, "rumor going around from politico. want to do more people coming out tomorrow. can you check your sources?" four minutes later cuomo
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responded, "on it." >> trevor: look, look, look. on the the one hand this is a story about a guy helping his brother in a time of crisis. and i mean, who wouldn't do that for their brother? because you've got to remember, brother is the top level of male relationship. yeah, it goes brother, my dude, homey, this guy, and stepdad. and don't forget. this is ingrained. siblings learn to cover for cookies, he breaking the cookie jar, you tell your mom the jar broke by itself and your brother shares want cookies with you. that's how it works. now that i think about it, izaac never shared the cookies. ma! izaac broke the jar. i changed my mind! of course it does matter and it makes a difference how you help your brother and what you're helping him with. like, if your brother murdered somebody, you can either help him get the best lawyer in the country, or you can help him bury the the body.
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both make you a good brother, but one makes you an accessory after the fact. that's a choice you are making. and the big problem is chris used his influence as a cnn journalist to help dig up info on andrew's accusers. and, people, that's not what cnn is about. cnn is about sitting 12 people together at a desk and have them yell at each other about whether adele's las vegas residency is going to hurt biden's poll numbers or not. that is cnn. enough about cnn. let's talk about covid, a disease around so long it's now at high risk of catching covid. since first being discovered in south africa, we have now learned that omicron has been in countries around the globe. and today, they confirmed the first known case in the united states. states. yeah. i mean, damn. omicron got here quickly. say what you want about joe biden, but he got that supply chain moving. am i right, guys? no? all right. apparently they found a single case of omicron in california,
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which is just so typical. you know, omicron gets a little buzz and immediately wants to try to make it in hollywood. "oh, i'm special." aside from learning about covid's newest variant, now we're also learning more about its most-famous supporter, donald "j" trump. do you remember how last year, a month before the election, he suddenly came down with coronavirus? yeah. it was hilarious. i mean, it was very scary. we were all so scared, so scared. well, now, we're finding out that trump was basically a one-man superspreader. >> we do begin with breaking news. donald trump tested positive for coronavirus three days before his first debate against joe biden on september 29, 2020. this stunning revelation is in a new book by former white house chief of staff mark meadows that was obtained by the guardian. a positive test, the country never knew about. >> here is the timeline as we know it: on saturday, september
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26, of 2020, trump 40e69ed the rose garden event for supreme court justice amy coney barrett. >> later that evening, he made his way to a rally in pennsylvania. as marine one is lifting off, the white house doctor calls and says to stop him because his covid test came back positive. according to meadows, he was then tested again. that test came back negative, so they moved on as though nothing had happened. on tuesday, the day of the debate, meadows says trump was moving more slowly than usual but "nothing was going to stop trump from going out there." >> of course, two days after that, trump tested positive again, alerts the world by tweet, later spend three nights in the hospital, getting treatment. treatment. >> trevor: yeah, people! donald trump got a positive covid test, then retested and got a negative test, and then just went about his life without telling anybody. which on the one hand was incredibly irresponsible and dangerous, but on the other
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hand, it was very relatable. i mean, that's why you get second opinions, right? if one doctor tells you that you're very ill and you don't have much longer, but another doctor says, "lookin good, my man, you should go to miami." you're going to roll with that doctor. what was especially irresponsible about this is that he hit hid, he completely hid his positive test right before he went on stage and screamed at 98-year-old joe biden for two hours. i'm not saying that trump was trying to assassinate joe biden, but he definitely wasn't going out of his way to avoid it. "if this is god's plan for joe biden, what can i do to stop it, except maybe wear a mask, which i won't do because it's totally gay. so gay." looking back on it, we should have been able to tell that trump can coronavirus at the debate. i mean, just look at the footage. >> look, i have a mask right here. i'll put the mask on, you know, when i think i need it. >> mr. president-- >> can i be honest? >> try to go honest
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>> when they run through the middle of the town-- >> president trump. >> and kill people all over the place. ( applause ) >> trevor: i'm not sure how we missed it back then. huh. all right, let's move on from trump to the supreme court. the supreme court that he created in his image, in fact. abortion has been a constitutional right in the united states ever since the supreme court decided "roe v. wade" nearly half a century ago. but based on what happened at the supreme court today, it seems like it won't be a right for much longer. >> fox news alert, oral arguments in a landmark abortion case wrapping up at the supreme court after nearly two hours. the hearing setting up a decision by the high court now with a 6-3 conservative majority that could change abortion laws across the country. >> hundreds of protesters from both sides of the issue gathered outside of the supreme court. >> the stakes could not be higher. "roe v. wade" is on the line as the justices consider a law from
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mississippi that would ban almost all abortions after 15 weeks of pregnancy. >> after today's arguments over abortion, it appears a borkz right in america, as they stand right now, are in grave danger. after two hours of questioning, the general consensus among legal experts is that there are at least five votes to uphold mississippi's ban on abortion after 15 weeks of pregnancy. and possibly as many votes to overturn a federal right to an abortion altogether. >> trevor: oh, boy, based on the oral arguments in the supreme court today, it looks very likely that "roe v. wade" will soon be overturned. and you know when you think about it, it is wild. it is wild for the united states to take such a step backwards in women's rights. it's almost like the u.s. invaded afghanistan to defeat the taliban, and then came back to the u.s. like, "actually, those guys have some pretty good ideas." and now, the truth is, the truth is that this is the culmination of a 50-year plan for the conservative movement to reshape the courts for this very
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purpose. and say what you want about it, but you've got to admit, man, the conservative movement is just that dedicated to protecting life. i mean, not protecting life from coronavirus or school shootings or from a lack of healthcare or climate change or poverty or homelessness or-- and i know, i know, i know there are guys out there right now who are saying, "you know what? tough luck ladies, but this doesn't affect me." first of all, you're going to see it affect your bank account when you're paying child support for 18 years. and, secondly, you guys clearly don't see what's happening here yeah, because, first, first, they said a baby is only a baby when it comes out of the vagina. then they said it's a baby when it's viable outside of the womb, right. now you've got people arguing if there's any electrical signal it counts as a heartbeat. you realize what's coming up. at some point they'll be like, "we decided that sperms is babies, so you can't jack off anymore." "what if i have a wet dream?"
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"then your ass is going to jail." now you're in your dreams trying to get your high school teacher to put her shirt back on. "no, mrs. patterson, put your shirt back on." i'm kidding. obviously, nobody is going to regulate what men can do with their bodies. calm down, everybody. look, we don't know what the ruling will be and we won't find out until next year, but you can tell a lot where the justices stand based on what kind of arguments they made. for example, justice brett kavanaugh, trump appointee and guy at the bar who insists he's totally fine to drive. he emphasized the view that overturning the right to abortion actually would be the neutral position because it is neither prolife nor prochoice, but simply leaves the issue up to the states. and i have to admit, guys, that argument actually makes a lot of sense. like, why should there be one abortion law for the entire country? i mean, people in alabama and people in california have very
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different views on this, so maybe it should be different in different states. although, when you think about it, there are also differences in different parts of each state. so, really, the law should be by county. that would be better. they should say red counties in a blue state can ban abortions but blue counties in red states can allow abortion. that seems fair. it's up to the states but leave it up to the counties. maybe it should be at the level of the city or the town yeah-- no, wait, what if each house-- oh, yes, each house! each house could have its own rule. yeah, this makes sense, right, because the neighbors they don't always agree with each other, in the in the house-- within the house people have different opinions. you know what, what if each person made their own rule, like, each person could decide for themselves what they could do with their own-- shit, people, i figured it out. get me a taxi to the supreme court. get me a taxi to the bar next to
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the supreme court i want to tell justice kavanaugh about this. when we come back, i will be talking to a former gun manufacturer about what he regrets. and then scottie pippen will be joining me on the show. you don't want to miss it. tell the taxi to it's the most wonderful time of the year. it is all about t-mobile with their great deals for everyone every day including customers on sprint. tell us more dianne. new and existing customers on the magenta max plan can trade up to the new iphone 13 pro and t-mobile will pay for it. customers can also get a free year of apple tv plus. i know you love ted lasso, george. guilty as charged. t-mobile is bringing it all together for the holidays. upgrade to the iphone 13 pro on us. plus get a free year of apple tv plus. only at t-mobile.
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anything that can be done to try and reduce gun violence in the country? and just so people have an understanding of who you are, i mean, you're like the poster child for the n.r.a. you were gifted shotguns as a kid, right? you were an avid hunter. you were an avid defender-- you still are-- of the second amendment. you worked for a gun manufacturer for 25 years. and yet, you say there is a lot that is wrong with the gun industry. let's talk about that. what changed in your life? what was the moment where you thought, this is not going the way it should? >> i think there's a few things that changed, more than anything. i think the gun industry and the n.r.a. changed around all of us. and i think democracy, you know, there's a lot of freedoms in america which are beautiful--
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the right to self-defense and to own guns and to do things that i love to do with my boys and to shoot and to hunt and all of those things is fantastic. but if it's not balanced with responsibility, it's going to run out of control. and i started to see things in the firearms industry and in my life and in my career where responsibility was not being inserted into the discussion anymore, and just runaway rights were taking over. and in the early 1990s and in the 2000s, when i got into the industry, it was a much different place where responsibility and decency were still inserted into the argument. and they're no longer there anymore. it's a very frightening-- it's a very frightening place we live in now. >> trevor: it's interesting you say that because, you know, when i was reading the book, there were so many things i didn't know about the journey of the n.r.a., i didn't know about the journey of guns in america. as an insider you give an insight into a world i think a lot of people don't know about. i didn't realize at some point the n.r.a. essentially became more powerful than the manufacturers of guns
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themselves. you talk about a moment where smith & wesson decided to stand up and say actually maybe we could do more for gun safety, and the n.r.a. led a boycott against them. >> it's important to note, i often hear on reports and npr segments where people say, "well, the n.r.a. is just a tool of the firearms manufacturers." i found that to be exact let's opposite. the n.r.a. ran the show. they still ran the show. they set the narrative. everything that they disat of stated, every tactic that they laid down, everybody said, "yes, sir, can i have another?" my experience is there is no separation between the n.r.a. and the firearm industry because there's an intertwined symbioseis of what drives success for the n.r.a., which is fear, conspiracy theory, hatred of the other, acceptance of racism-- those things drive electoral outcomes and the n.r.a. stumbled on to that 15 or 18 years ago. those are exactly the same things that drive firearm sales. so there's a very unhealthy
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symbioseis between those two institutes. >> trevor: one of the parts of the book that really stuck with me was when you were talking about yourself as a gun owner and talking about your sons and your family, and you said something interesting that i think a lot of people don't think about, and you said we don't identify with guns. we like using them. we like hunting with them. we like shooting with them, but we don't identify ourselves with the firearms. what did that mean and why is that important? >> well, i think there's a couple of different types of flags that we saw on january 6. we saw trump and american flags, and then we saw the other type of flag we saw were come and take an ar-15 flags. political radicals, right-wing political radicals in this country now are driven, are owned-- they use guns as the central symbol of their identity. it's a dangerous thing. this is authoritarianism at its formative stages. there are millions of responsible gun owners in this country who love to shoot with their kids and hunt and do all the things that i love to do.
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>> trevor: right. >> and believe in the right to self-defense. but this-- but this idea that guns are somehow the symbol of some right-wing political movement, that-- that's a dangerous 1936 germany stuff. it's frightening. >> trevor: so do you think there's a world then where america can find a balance between owning guns and still living in a safer society? i ask this question because here on the show we've done a piece on switzerland and how switzerland i think has more guns per cap that than the u.s. and yet has lower gun deathses than the u.s. the swiss say they teach people to respect the weapons. they teach people how to hold the weapons, play with the weapon weapons, use the weapons in the right environments. even kids are taught how to shoot in some of the schools. and there feels like there's a culture around the guns. what i found interesting again in the gun is you talk about how that culture used to exist. and then it started getting mocked, you talk about the fuds, "the elmer fuds, it seems like it's not cool to be safe with guns now in the world of gun
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ownership. >> well, that sort of responsible activity slows down the desired outcome. it's not cool to be responsible in our politics anymore. if you haven't noticed, all of these social norms that once existed, where you didn't say certain things, you didn't tweet death threats to former-- to members of congress. >> trevor: right. >> these norms were not broken. that's the-- the same thing happened in the firearms industry 15, 18 years ago. these norms of self-control, responsibility, decency, and to your point about, like, what is the way out of this? well, america is a democracy that operates in the gray spaces. it's a beautiful thing, but it only exists because of norms and imposed self-responsibility. and gun owners for a long time were a poster child for that sort of responsibility. i tell stories until the book about how the firearms industry 15 or 18 years ago would not allow tactical anything to be displayed in its own trade show-- gloves, tactical vests, ar-15s-- those were not
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displayed in its own trade show. >> trevor: and why was that? >> it imposed-- the framingham industry imposed the rules on itself, upon ourselves. we knew this was a bad thing to infiltrate society with. >> trevor: a fringe idea of what owning a gun was about. >> and we knew that was a dangerous thing. that meant we send a certain level of sales and we wouldn't infillerate guns, proliferated guns and lack of decency throughout society. but you have to accept that sort of self-restraint. that sort of self-restraint is now gone. and the same exact thing is happening in our politics. the sorts of things that we once knew not to say, not to do, not to call your relative, not to call your coworker, not to say in polite society, that's all gone. the n.r.a. and the gun industry perfected that. >> trevor: when we talk about some of the policies what do you look at? i know one of the proposals that seems to have support from the right and left is people saying, hey, let's go after those dealers who are selling guns to people, and they know it's going
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straight to the black market. let's go after those dealers. are you for legislation like that? what other policies do you think america could actually implement where people would see a change in gun violence? >> i'm in favor of two things right now. one, we need to close the gun show loophole. we've been trying to do this since before columbine. the kids in columbine used guns purchased through the gun show loophole. 20-something years later we still haven't closed it. it's a simple thing. it's unforgivable. we should do it. it's not going to be perfect. it will fix some things. it will mitigate some things. that needs to be done. secondarily, i'm worried about the largest societal impacts and the graffe of where right-wing radicalization is taking our country. i don't think kyle rittenhouse was an aberration. i think he's a warning of what's to come. we need to outlaw as a country, state by state, county by county, or hopefully as a nation, open-armed intimidation. you can't have open civil
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society. you can't have democracy when one party is standing over the other with a loaded ar-15. that's not civil. so i believe two things would help now. close the gun show loophole, and legislation to outlaw armed intimidation and open carry. >> trevor: well, you've written a really compelling book. i know there will be people who will be for it, people who will be against it. but that's what arguments are for. thank you for joining me on the show. >> thank you, trevor. >> trevor: "gunfight" is available wherever books are sold. when we come back, n.b.a. legend scottie pippen will be joining scottie pippen will be joining me right
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daily show." my next guest is n.b.a. hall of famer and six-time n.b.a. champion and two-time olympic gold medalist, scottie pippen. he's here to talk about his brand-new memoir, "unguarded." scottie pippen, welcome to "the daily show." >> thank you, it's a pleasure. thanks for having me. it's a pleasure to be on your show. >> trevor: it can't be a pleasure. let me tell you what a pleasure
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is. a pleasure is me talking to one of my favorite basketball players of all time. i'm someone who didn't even know basketball, but all i knew was the number-one player to play with on n.b.a. jam was can the. i. i had two favorite players in the n.b.a. jam game, scottie pippen and mugsy bowes. if i wanted to win i went with scottie pippen, if i wanted to play the cheapos, i played with mugsy bowes. thank you for being on the show and thank you for writing the book, man. it's been a really amazing journey getting to know who you are as a human being. let's start with the light side of scottie pippen. what i found really interesting about you is starting with the life that you lived. you had to really get over so many hurdles in life. you come from a big family. you come from a family that went through a lot of struggles. you talk about your brother and him being paralyzed at a young age. you talk about your dad suffering a similar fate but from a very different standpoint. when you look at that journey that scottie pippen had, you know, you had to maic decisions
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in life and you had to become a really resilient person. what do you think it was that gave you the fortitude to get through the things that you got through to get to where you got to. >> i would say it's my parents to see the life they had taken on. it wasn't something they were prepared for by any means could we afford to have, you know, two disabled people living in one household. but we were able to pull through it, through the struggles and the ups and downs and, you know, we-- we made the best of what we had. >> trevor: i found myself wondering the whole time reading the book, did young scottie pippen know that he was going to be one of the greatest every time he touched the ball? or was young scottie pippen just trying to get from one play to the next, one moment to the next? >> i think i was taking it day by day, step by step. like any kid, i was dreaming and wanting one day to play in the
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n.b.a., but, you know, along that journey, you've got to reach certain other steps, you know, like playing college basketball. >> trevor: right, right. >> getting my education, things of that nature. so those things were important to me along the way, but ultimately, i didn't know what type of basketball player i would be, if i would be one that was one of the 50 greatest, if i would get a trial for an n.b.a. team. you just hope for best, and you work as hard as you can to make sure that you're prepared for it. you know it's a long journey, and i feel like i prepared myself for it. >> trevor: i feel like you've lived a life as one of the greatest basketball players, and now you've become an author of one of the greatest books that delves will into the minds and the inner workings of one of the greatest teams and sports legacies of all time. let's start with the beginning. i mean, that's where the book starts, the prologue, if we jump right to the beginning. in the prologue you talk about
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"the last dance," the documentary that everyone was watching during the pandemic, the story that everybody was talking about. and you talk about how, you know, you wanted to speak your truth, you wanted to get your story out there. when you were writing the book, was this-- was this your way of feeling like you could answer some of the questions that people asked from the the documentary and maybe didn't show your side of the story? >> well, i think i kind of, you know, took myself away from being in the public eye during the documentary. >> trevor: right. >> i don't know if people even recall, but i was working for espn when the documentary came out, and took a little hiatus, because i didn't want to have to relive telling the story about what happened, you know, 20 years ago. so that was one thing. but i did feel like that the documentary was not really about "the last dance," because i felt
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like that it was a lot of footage that was taken that was going to be really crazy and one of the greatest teams that really ever been put together in the n.b.a. and really praise a lot of the people that was a part of that great team. and i felt like the documentary was solely built and controlled through michael jordan, and i didn't feel like it really gave justice to a lot of the great players, coach, just that we're a part of that journey. it was truly something that i felt like needed to be expressed from a team standpoint. >> trevor: you know, michael jordan is undoubtedly one of the greatest to ever do it, but clearly as a person, it must be challenging to play with be some like that who you know has a certain frame of mind for what they're doing. when you were playing with him as a teammate, did you have to, you know, situate yourself according to him, or how did you
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manage michael's ego, while also playing on a team with michael? >> well, it was an adjustment. when i came into the n.b.a., to the chicago bulls organization, michael had been with the organization for three seasons, three losing seasons. so it was an adjustment for him to change his style of play and how he played the game, and it was i guess up to me to sort of pick up areas where i felt like that i could be a good fit for the team to, you know, get us in a position where we could be successful, but also opening up as a player where i could show my talent and my greatness on the court as well. >> trevor: you know, every page i turned to, i could see why this became a "new york times" bestseller, because it's scottie pippen telling us his true, it's one of the greatest n.b.a. players delving into, you know, the inner workings of one of the greatest periods in
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basketball. and there's a part that i-- that really stuck with me. when you wrote your own tombstone, which is really funny. i mean, it seems morbid, but it's really funny where you write,"i'm also convinced that literally to my grave this will be my tombstone "scottie maurice pippin, beloved husband and father' seven-time n.b.a. all-star, six-time n.b.a. champion, and sat out the final eight seconds of a play-off game between the chicago bulls and new york knicks." i was interested in that. obviously, that's something people have talked about, but i wonder why you think that would be something that would always follow your legacy. why do you think that moment was so big, not just for you, but for how people saw it from the outside? >> well, i think what people saw from the outside they had never saw a player really stand up for himself fa against a coach in tt type of situation, and i think i was that player to sort of break
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that ice. and it was a moment in time for me because i have been challenged my whole life, and i had been playing under the wings of michael jordan for, i guess at that time, six years, three championships. so i felt like it was time for me to break out and to let them know that, hey, i came here to be a star player. i didn't come here to be a second fiddler to anyone. and i think i needed to make that stance. and it just so happened it was a game they felt like, you know, it was that moment where i needed to speak out. >> trevor: well, you know what, there's a reason you're a hall of famer, there's a reason you have your six rings, there's a reason you're a niems bestseller, and in my heart, because of n.b.a. jam, there's a reason you're still the best video game character of all time. that move, i used to do that move with you all the time, jut to get the guy off the ball.
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scottie could rebound better than anybody in that game. you have ever played yourself in that game, by the way? >> no, i missed my time for video games. >> trevor: you're missing out. you did this thing-- i didn't even know what basketball was. i just played video games and there was some move you would get. you would rebound, jump up, scottie could get it before everybody, and as soon as i would land, would do this and do this, and everyone would fall around me, and i would go to the other side and dunk. i literally knew you you as a video game character. from my world there was keanu from street fighter and scottie pippen from n.b.a. jam. this is a real person in a real country. this is ridiculous. no one can jump that high and fight people like this. but here he is. thank you, scot, i appreciate you. >> thank you, trevor, i appreciate it. >> trevor: don't forget, people, scottie's men wor, "unguarded," is available right now. you definitely will want to read it.
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we have to take a quickr
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so they only pay for what they need. (gasps) ♪ did it work? only pay for what you need ♪ liberty. liberty. liberty. liberty. ♪ spider-man no way home in theaters december 17th
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- all right, that's 2.8 centimeters. should give us a drag of only... 0.6 milliseconds. hold the front here, stan.
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[drill whirring] - hey, guys, it's almost 2:00 a.m. - we know! - well, it's way past time for bed. - sharon, stan's pinewood derby race is tomorrow. do you have any idea how important this is to him? stan is not gonna lose to the goddamn hollises again! - well, it's just a block of wood and some wheels. i don't think there's that much more you can do with it. - that's 'cause you're a chick! now, just leave us alone! don't worry, son. the hollises are not beating us this year. i went and got something to put inside our car and make it go extra fast. - dad, we're not allowed to add anything to the car that doesn't come in the approved kit, remember? - stan, how do you think the hollises beat us every year? i'm sure they put lead in the wood or something. we're just leveling the playing field. there. - what is that? - it's--it's nothing, really. - tom, i'm standing outside the hadron particle supercollider in switzerland, where authorities are shocked and baffled over the theft of a superconducting bending magnet created for use in tests with particle acceleration. - oh, no, he didn't.
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- the superconducting magnet was stolen sometime last week. surveillance cameras were able to record the theft on tape, and police are now looking for princess leia organa of alderaan. caught here in these photos, the troubled rebel princess is seen taking the superconducting magnet and then appearing disoriented as she tries to find her way out. if you have any information of princess leia's whereabouts, please call your local police department. - all right, scouts and dads, the racing continues. and it looks like our next heat is ready to go in three, two, one-- race! 2.1 seconds for tommy bretz! looks like we have a new leader, folks! - all right! - all right! - all right, stan, we're gonna need to check in and have our car inspected to qualify. now, son, daddy needs to teach you something very important about "tells." - "tells"? - when you tell them you only used the approved kit, don't look up and away, don't rub your neck, and don't touch your ear. otherwise, they'll know you're lying to them, all right?
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whenever you need to lie, just don't look up and away, rub your neck, or touch your ear. - dad, maybe we should just take out the thing you put in the car-- - son, you have to learn how to lie correctly someday. might as well be today, all right? i love you, son. - looks good. thank you, and good luck today. all right, next, please. name? - it's, uh, marsh. - all right, car weighs in at 15 ounces. do you hereby swear that you used parts in the official pinewood derby kit and only parts in the official pinewood derby kit? - [whispering] yes, i do. yes, i do. - yes, i do. - all right, young man, good luck today. - oh, yes! - well, well, look, son, it's the marshes. - hey, hollis. you guys race already? - no, little emmett hasn't gone yet. think they're saving the best for last. clocked her in at home at 1.5 seconds. it's the fastest car we've ever built.


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