Skip to main content

tv   The Greg Gutfeld Show  FOX News  August 16, 2015 7:00pm-8:01pm PDT

7:00 pm
when we are not here we miss you. thanks for joining us. have a great night. >> i am thinking maybe buy a field hockey team. >> are you kidding me? a field hockey team? >> seems like it is low over head. not a lot of equipment. >> you got that part down. field hockey? >> excuse me, your 3:00 pm is here. >> thank you very much. >> did i just hear -- they just call you lucifer? >> no. no. >> i swear. i heard that. >> oh, greg, it's lou. >> is lou short for anything? >> lou is short for lewis. >> lewis. i must have miss heard. anyway, are we still on for
7:01 pm
tonight at hot tub south? excellent. i will bring the trunks. good to see you. >> as always. >> >> i think he is not talking straight. i think he's talking in a horrible way. >> he says really hateful and racist things. >> he is totally stupid. >> i have no idea what his real philosophy is other than he is for promoting himself. >> yeah we get it. he is awful. let's save him from himself. >> hi, i am greg gutfeld. thank you for not going outside tonight. here's what's coming up. hillary's e-mail scandal is growing like a rash on bill clinton's arm. we assess the damage and give her absolutely no advice whatsoever. is the world coming apart? who is to blame? college professor donald trump
7:02 pm
and the cast of god spell. i have no answers. what a one of these two is a robot. the other is human. should they be allowed to marry each other? not on my watch. in separate segments they are too damn big. let's get the party started america. >> hillary's campaign speaking faster than her husband's shorts at club med. her private server is in the hands of the fbi. her reputation tattered. like my recent butt implant she is out of sight yet transpare transparently false. she is maintaining 30,000 official e-mails on a private server is no big deal. she dumped 30,000 other e-mails because they were personal. she did personal business half of the time while on the clock. how is that okay? hillary is so bad at e-mail she sent e-mails asking about a book on how to delete e-mails. this is not a joke. she really did that. god helps us if she responded to
7:03 pm
one of the nigerian e-mails asking for cash. we would have nothing left in the treasury. a decorated marine operator is discharged for classified information on his account. major sent it as an urgent warning because an attack was coming. the e-mail went unheeded the attack was carried out three marines were killed. the one marine trying to stop it was punished for sending classified information through his private e-mail. he gets punished she campaigns and makes jokes. >> snap chat attempt. i love it. i love it. the those messages disappear all by themselves. >> hillary is like the creepy real estate agent who sells you the house without telling you it was uonce owned by a cult who made sacrifices in the basement.
7:04 pm
then she says i had no idea and makes a joke. she is like a bad wedding present the sooner you exchange it the better. she is a gravy boat what you need right now is instore credit. >> period. >> let's welcome tonight's cast and there's a lot of them sunday night. probably high on a mixture of kalu roy and paranoia. street he is so sharp you can skin a rabbit with his thoughts. political editor and fox news contributor. his latest book end of discussion. another liberal who doesn't smell like sweat. she won a local beauty pageant once and it has been downhill since. her glasses are as real as her feelings. it's like talking to a wall back again the liberal panel. >> is it wishful thinking to
7:05 pm
think this female scandal is the end of hillary clinton? >> it is not wishful at all. she has been through so much worse and not gone ten a tenth of the glblow back. all of the different gates she is got ten away with she was involved in vince alleged suicide. >> you are crazy. >> she did some weird post suicide evidence stuff. >> did she? >> we don't have to go back to vincent foster. we don't have to go back. >> okay. but you look at her fast and all of this horrible stuff she got away with and i think obama is involved in this because he doesn't want her to win and that's why he is being so>> valley jarrett is speaking. >> there you go. she is your lady. >> i love her. >> there are things conservatives don't like. >> i am getting this feeling after 20-years. i cannot wait to vote for her. i cannot wait to vote for her
7:06 pm
twice. look, who among us have not accidentally sent an e-mail with national security clearance information inside of it? it is a human thing. she is a human being. >> that's where you are wrong. we don't know if she is a human being. i doubt she is a human being. she doesn't think this is a big deal, john. >> it has been more than 20-years. she is teflon. this adds to the noise. this conspiracy is partly because of how sketchy she is. there are many reasons i like her many veins i want to vote for her. the scandals it sounds like noise to me. >> teflon is awful for your health. >> it is? >> teflon frying pans, yeah, it scratches and then it's bad for you. >> are you aware this show is sponsored by teflon? >> yeah, i am, i want to do something about it. >> you just killed this show. that was paying my salary.
7:07 pm
i have a theory. would you like to hear it? >> i have several theories already. >> you are not impressed by them are you? >> shut up and listen to my theory. >> you know who hillary is hillary is robin to bill clinton's batman. no one cares about robin. they go to see batman. when she has been hanging around batman for so long she thinks she has the same power as batman. with in fact she is robin. she thinks she is batman and nobody like robin. >> i would agree bill clinton is teflon but she is not. if she went to a state she parachuted into a state and then she ran for president and lost. we look at ratings for favor ability and honesty and head to head with republicans this is having an impact. bill clinton is a talented likeable liar. bill clinton is worse at both of
7:08 pm
those things. >> she is never been prosecuted for her crimes. >> aside from the vince foster issue. >> they would have been prosecuted for it. >> every gate they have was a gate including watergate. she has been involved in all gates. >> you know what she is? she is involved in gate gate which is a whole bunch of gates. i have a question i am curious. katherine, what happened to robin anyway? twhofz the guy that blade robin? >> burt ward. he's 70. looks like in terms of other roles the last thing he did was the voice of young barnic el boy in a 2010 episode of spongebob square pants. in september he will be going to expo in beautiful sunny cincinnati. it is not true that nobody cares about robin. tropical cincinnati paradise cares. >> he is 70.
7:09 pm
70 years old. they say life keeps getting better? is not for you though. it probably won't get better. >> do the democrats have a plan b as in b for bernie, b for biden, b for boring or how about b for betty buckley. is it entirely feasible one of these will be the nominee debor. >> bernie sanders is sort of trump like to me in that he is telling me things sometimes i want to hear. i mean, i like -- there's not a lot of discussion in the democratic party right now. we are really not talking. it is not as ruckus. >> you are talking too much. i want to talk to the liberal panel. are you worried about hillary clinton? who would you like to see? >> hillary is fine. you conservatives make a big deal about nothing. she wiped her server clean.
7:10 pm
she wouldn't hand over a filthy server. where the out arooifrj tom brady's cell phone. >> i think he destroyed it. >> i think he did. speaking of destruction is the democratic party in deep trouble? what about al gore? he should show up with a long beard and a cast hand. he should look like other son wells in it the days of ghoul yo gallo. saying i am taking over. >> the democrats have nothing to say. the whole thing is feel good people suck kid garbage. they might win based on he's niece. >> what about john he had cards. could john edwards come back? he's young. he has some kids. >> good guy. feel good story. we love a comeback story. >> we do. we do. >> you cheat on your cancer stricken wife but god love you. let's try again. >> who hasn't done that before, joanne? >> not yet.
7:11 pm
i am kind of feeling like there's some kind of conspiracy happening especially with other significant people in the democratic party. i think they know something really revealing is going to come out of this investigation and they are going to need a new candidate which is why they are going to plan b and they are pushing biden towards it because he's the most lovable guy. >> when al capone ends up in jail for tax problems. it is some what irrelevant on the grand scale of things. it's fishy. oo i want to get to kat before we break. any thoughts from where you perch? >> hillary clinton is going to get away with everything either she is good at getting away with stuff or she is never wrong. i want to get over herself fees. i learned the harder you try to be cool the less cool people think you are. >> is that a rough childhood? >> yeah, high school was a real
7:12 pm
rough. >> it will get worse for you. it never gets any better. high point of your life was high school. >> must trn trusting a pretty blonde in high school. >> i had a mullet. >> shut up. i want to go to break. coming up, why does marc cuban want to be donald trump's running mate? look at that shirt. also whether he ever wants to pump mr. wonderful in the face. >> next week this is important we want to start answering your your questions, your mail. you need to e-mail me at greg mail -- that's not porno. greg mail at stick around or i will write nasty things about you on fir facebook. i will. for fastidious librarian emily skinner, each day was fueled by thorough preparation for events to come. well somewhere along the way, emily went right on living. but you see, with the help of her raymond james financial advisor, she had planned for every eventuality.
7:13 pm
which meant she continued to have the means to live on even at the ripe old age of 187. life well planned. see what a raymond james advisor can do for you. ♪ [music] jackie's heart attack didn't come with a warning. today her doctor has her on a bayer aspirin regimen to help reduce the risk of another one. if you've had a heart attack be sure to talk to your doctor before you begin an aspirin regimen. (vo)cars for crash survival,ning subaru has developed our most revolutionary feature yet. a car that can see trouble...
7:14 pm
...and stop itself to avoid it. when the insurance institute for highway safety tested front crash prevention nobody beat subaru models with eyesight. not honda. not ford or any other brand. subaru eyesight. an extra set of eyes, every time you drive. it takes a lot of work... but i really love it.s. i'm on the move all day long... and sometimes, i just don't eat the way i should. so i drink boost® to get the nutrition that i'm missing. boost complete nutritional drink has 26 essential vitamins and minerals, including calcium and vitamin d to support strong bones and 10 grams of protein to help maintain muscle. all with a great taste. i don't plan on slowing down any time soon. stay strong. stay active with boost®. so you're a small business expert from at&t? yeah, give me a problem and i've got the solution. well, we have 30 years of customer records. our cloud can keep them safe and accessible anywhere. my drivers don't have time to fill out forms. tablets. keep them all digital. we're looking to double our deliveries. our fleet apps will find the fastest route.
7:15 pm
oh, and your boysenberyy apple scones smell about done. ahh, you're good. i like to bake. with at&t get up to $400 dollars in total savings on tools to manage your business.
7:16 pm
>> emotions cause all problems. the latest cover story of the atlantic two shrinks argue political correctness turns college students into nonthinking blobs who sacrifice reason for emotional lies. the others conclude feelings now trump facts like the harvard law stew accident who can't want to be taught rape law wbecause it might be too stressing. micro aggressions which are underlying sexist comments.
7:17 pm
even asking where are you from was a micro aggression implies you are noticing one's race. turning young adults from stunted brats ideal for therapy instead of preparing them for real life college reverts them to infancy swapping destiny for depends that releases these wimps into the wild. the only acceptable group thinking should be at a puppy rave. ♪ >> this emotionalism is eating its way through politics as well. >> we haant an opportunity. >> ask him. (indiscernible) >> if you do not listen to her
7:18 pm
your event will be shut down right now. right now. >> poor bernie. modern activism hurts the narrative. if the truth hurts, truth becomes a hate crime. you are seeing glimmers of this now on the right. >> the right normally mocks emotional stances but some embrace a new anger led by this guy. >> rand ball you have to understand is a disaster. >> look at all of the media back there. scavengers. >> i like people who weren't captured. >> i would never give up my microphone. i thought that was disgusting jeb bush with his act of love. it's not working. >> rick perry should have to have an iq test. >> it is very entertaining, but i am a prude. meaning i don't jump into bed with just any provocateur. you have got to wine and dine me first with logic and facts, then
7:19 pm
the insults. so the party is devolving empowering and the loud ets voices. logic dies in service of emotion which ultimately leads to chaos. if you disagree with me you are a stup pied failure and a jerk and a loser, too. >> period. >> my next guest is so rich his driver has a driver and his mond monicle. marc cuban joins me from texas. mark first i have to ask you as a businessman if one of these students who had been raised on micro aggression had showed up to apply for a job, how would you treat that? what would you do? >> i would laugh at them. they have all been raised on micro aggression. everything is 140 characters everything is a facebook post. they think in terms of how are they going to be trolled and how do they droel somebody? they interview you are out you are fired.
7:20 pm
>> you don't strike me as an ideal log you strike me more as a pragmatist. when you look at the political landscape, is my theory emotion is taking over, is that a valid one? >> i wouldn't say it is taking over but it is certainly having an impact. everything has to live like i said before in 140 characters. you have donald throwing shade on the people he doesn't like. you have got doctor carson throwing shade on margaret sanger. i don't think he real will lied how far off he is. margaret sanger is responsible for birth control for all of us. anybody who has ever had sex with a partner that has used birth control owns a modest thanks to margaret sanger. we all look crocheted it is getting really bad in politics. >> what i like about it or don't like about it when somebody throws shade somebody else throws shade back. it's like two kids throwing am it will in the car and saying you started it. >> that is where it gets
7:21 pm
entertaining. donald is always going to be at the front of the camera. there's 16, 17 republican candidates. you have got all of these people trying to jump to the front of the line to get on camera to get the most retreats -- retweets get the most shared. the battle isn't going to get better. it is going to get worse. >> i could argue this is the influence of sports. the trash talk from sports has bled into political talk. >> you know what? it probably started with joe naamath saying he was going to win the super bowl. that created bulletin board material. it got them talking. i think you are right. >> you said you would like to be trump's vp if offered. how do you feel about his campaign so far? >> he has had some miss steps. donald is horrible on social media. trump turrets is one of the worst things going when he opens up the twitter account. he did some really good things with his interview with hannity.
7:22 pm
he had a bill bit of a p come back in the debated. everybody is playing checkers. once we get a chess match with fewer candidates we will see it come out. as we get a little closer and things get a little more serious we will find out where doven nald is at. >> i have to ask you a few things about shark tank. one of my favorites. i have a number of products i have been working on in my basement. if you would be willing to invest say yes or no or ask me questions. number one jerky shocks. these are socks made of jerky. ideal for road trips. >> made of jerky, great. might want to change the names that's not the first impression that comes to mind. >> yeah, you are right. it means something completely different. how did i miss that?
7:23 pm
i was going to ask for 5 percent of the company and 200,000 dollars. >> i will call you. >> how about pickle stap builder. i have a hard time when they move apart a pick kel stapler would keep them in one spot. >> i am going to have to do due diligence on that one. >> bicycle desk so when you are on your way to work you are actually working. >> brilliant. everybody can play productivity is down in erk ma. you are going to do something for this country. i like it. i am in. >> ice cream stake wheak when y don't have time to have main course and dessert it's a mixture of meat and ice cream in one big bowl. >> i have to pass. i am lactose intolerant. >> that's a micro aggression against people who drink milk if you are lactose intolerant. >> how about bob kooz zee it's a
7:24 pm
koeze with bob kooz zion it. >> how about a leather game boy? you don't even know what that is? >> i know what a game boy is but i am trying to figure out how you take leather and put covering around it. when you have your first prototype let's talk. >> always a pleasure even though this was the first time i have ever talked to you. always a pleasure. marc cuban thanks for coming on. enjoy the shirt. >> thank you for having me on. >> should robots be allowed to marry? i hope so. otherwise i have a diamond ring to take back. father jonathan morris debates me next. and sleep deprived. bring us those who want to feel well rested. aleve pm. the only one to combine a safe sleep aid... plus the 12 hour pain relieving strength of aleve. be a morning person again with aleve pm.
7:25 pm
when i went on to ancestry, i just put in the name yes, we are twins. of my parents and my grandparents. i was getting all these leaves and i was going back generation after generation. you start to see documents and you see signatures of people that you've never met. i mean, you don't know these people, but you feel like you do. you get connected to them. i wish that i could get into a time machine and go back 100 years, 200 years and just meet these people. being on ancestry just made me feel like i belonged somewhere. discover your story. start searching for free now at watch as these magnificent creatures take flight, soaring away from home towards the promise of a better existence. but these birds are suffering. because this better place turned out to have a less reliable cell phone network, and the videos on their little bird phones kept buffering.
7:26 pm
birds hate that. so they came back home. come home to verizon and now get 12 gigs for $80 a month plus $20 per line. verizon. come home to a better network. after we are all inside for a while, it gets pretty stuffy. when dad opens up the window, what's the first thing he does? the tobin stance. but when we open up the windows, you can see the dust floating around. there's dog hair. pollen. more work. (doorbell) whoa! what's this? swiffer sweeper! swiffer dusters! removes up to 70% of dust and allergens. stays on there like glue. can't do that with the other broom. wow, i love it. the tobin stance! that is totally what it is! at fthe world thinks about pet food,y one wagging tail at a time. with fresh meat and fresh veggies. it's food so fresh, the only preservative we use is the fridge. freshpet. a fresh take on pet food.
7:27 pm
okay! fun's over. aw. aw. ♪ thirsty? they said it would make me cool. they don't sound cool to me. guess not. you got to stick up for yourself, like with the name your price tool. people tell us their budget, not the other way around. aren't you lactose intolerant? this isn't lactose. it's milk. ♪ this isn't lactose. it's milk. toenail fungus? seriously? smash it with jublia! jublia is a prescription medicine proven to treat toenail fungus. use jublia as instructed by your doctor. look at the footwork! most common side effects include ingrown toenail, application site redness, itching, swelling,
7:28 pm
burning or stinging, blisters, and pain. smash it! make the call and ask your doctor if jublia is right for you. new larger size now available. >> time for tonight's debate. what i like to call, you're about to lose. >> the rules are simple. my show so i win. if you like to win work hard for several decades until you get your own show. nice topic. should humans be allowed to marry robots? a recent call among slate the web site not the sedimentary rock, argues, quote, robot human marriage is not about robot rights it is about the right of human to marry a robot. researchers developed this mother robot that can create this own tiny baby robot
7:29 pm
evaluating and pick the best to live on. >> should we embrace robots as spouses and parents? is i think we should. any one who disagrees is probably a racist or robotist. here to lose this debate straight south of chapel fox news contributor and all around great by father morris. legalized same-sex marriage, why not robots? >> i feel bad for the robots they can't fend for themselves. they can't be involved in this argument. as you presented this topic i thought first of all this is the low point of my career that i am arguing about whether or not robots and humans should marry. >> that's your low point? >> yes. i am willing to go for it because it brings out the point of what is marriage. whaels amazing is society, the government has been interested in bolstering marriage. they care about kids. the government thought the best thing for kids should have a mother and father and make a
7:30 pm
commitment to be with each other forever. >> robots can't be great dads or moms. >> you don't know that yet. robots sooner or later will merge with arted fish shall intelligence. when they have consciousness in a weird way we will be their creators. will they build us churches? >> if they do i am willing to go down that road. >> you would be a god. >> i think the point is that marriage is about romance. i suppose that somebody in a very sick mind has a romance with a robot. >> that was a jab at guy benson. >> i think marriage is about something more. that is about two people coming together who are able to procreate and have children to raise a family and saying we are going to be together forever. >> it is true. the change in marriage came when
7:31 pm
it became less about that and more about are you happy. the pursuit of happiness. the pursuit of marriage is less of a finite thing. you could get divorce if you were unhappy. that led to gay marriage. you could marry whoever you want. when marriage went from this is about children to the pursuit of happiness, things change. i don't think you could take it back. what about men who are very detestable? >> i am working for something that is disagreeable. i want you to lose badly about your own thing. we can debate about that next week how awesome am i. what about men or women who cannot find a human that will love them? they are so detestable that they have nothing the robot could provide that kind of companionship. why would you deprive them of that? >> i don't doubt that a robot could provide certain
7:32 pm
companionship of some sort that you get pleasure of looking at this thing that always says yes or no to you depending on what you want. two people say oh my gosh you are looking at me like i said something wrong. it is a very different thing two people have free will to say i am going to love you in good times and dad i am about to officiate a wedding now good times and in health. a robot can't do that. >> it could happen. let's get the liberal panel on this. where do you stand on robot human marriage? >> we are for all marriage you have not had a booty call you put the moves on your rumba. >> i don't think we have seen a documentary called blade runner but i love daryl hannah and she is a robot. >> you know what?
7:33 pm
sean young was quite possibly the most beautiful creature robot or human. >> she is a replica. >> who could not love rutger howard. >> you couldn't father because you don't like robots. >> i don't know who that is. >> father, thank you for putting up with me. i know you are officiating late. the wedding is over. >> yes. >> the robot was -- it is complicated. >> time to take a break. stick around if you like fun things and good stuff.
7:34 pm
>> we will sweep through your embarrassing mistakes. it won't prevent you from getting that new job. and your new girlfriend will have no idea that you used to be a mass saggist. >> 500 additional dollars we will unfriend your mom before you. they always said friendliness is cleanliness. >> order now. >> call now. plaque psoriasis. isn't it time to let the real you shine through? introducing otezla, apremilast. otezla is not an injection, or a cream. it's a pill that treats plaque psoriasis differently. some people who took otezla saw 75% clearer skin after 4 months. and otezla's prescribing information has no requirement for routine lab monitoring. don't take otezla if you are allergic to any of its ingredients.
7:35 pm
otezla may increase the risk of depression. tell your doctor if you have a history of depression or suicidal thoughts, or if these feelings develop. some people taking otezla reported weight loss. your doctor should monitor your weight and may stop treatment. side effects may include diarrhea, nausea, upper respiratory tract infection, and headache. tell your doctor about all the medicines you take, and if you're pregnant or planning to be. ask your doctor about otezla today. otezla. show more of you. as we age, certain nutrients... longer than ever. ...become especially important. from the makers of one a day fifty-plus. new one a day proactive sixty-five plus. with high potency vitamin b12... ...and more vitamin d.
7:36 pm
7:37 pm
i'm why? because it's red lobster's crabfest. and there's so much crab, so many ways. and with dishes like this luscious crab lover's dream or savory snow crab bake. i'm just getting started so hurry in and get crackin' myand a partly sunny and an outside to inside mode. transitions® lenses automatically filter just the right amount of light. ask for transitions xtractive lenses. extra protection from light... outdoors, indoors and in the car. morning ted! scott!
7:38 pm
ready to hit some balls? ooh! hey buddy, what's up? this is what it can be like to have shingles. oh, man. a painful, blistering rash. if you had chickenpox, the shingles virus is already inside you. 1 in 3 people will get shingles in their lifetime. ah. after almost 3 weeks, i just really wanted to give it a shot. you know, i'm not feeling it today. talk to your doctor or pharmacist about your risk. >> they made the river the color of joanne's liver. they were supposed to treat and pump out contaminated water in a toxic mine. they accidentally ripped a hole in the mine. the result a 3 million gallon spill containing heavy metal. turns out it turned it bright yellow and made life hell for thousands of people to depend on
7:39 pm
the river water. took six days for the epa to publically acknowledge this spill and apologize for it. the white house wouldn't comment and directed questions to the epa. it's the subject of a new segment i am calling... no worries a liberal did it. didn't the good news toxic skills create deep complex heros. >> you look at marlon those are all nuclear related. a super hero come out of disgusting yellow waste. >> that's true. >> i have cancer man. >> due diligence copies of that. >> what is this waste? >> mercury and led, greg. and samples 33 times higher than the limit and one with arsenic
7:40 pm
more than 800 times the limit. everybody knows that. >> that sounds bad. >> everybody knows that. it is affecting the kids. we need to make sure we are educated about the things that are affecting the kids. >> guy, if this were -- i hate to say it, if this were bush, this would be all over the place. he would be blamed for the death of fish, the death of children, the death of a river, the death of everything. >> taking a week to admit to it and cover up all of that. if this were a private sector our moral vetters of the epa would be swooping in to chastise and fine and vow rep percussions with this but these are the bureau krats that populate our federal government making the mistakes they are supposed to be regulating. oh, well our bad, sorry. we will try not to do it again. >> you are so smug, but this to me reveals -- i don't know why you started with that.
7:41 pm
you are not that smug. but you are seemingly smug. doesn't this whole story reveal when the media and the government are created from the same cloth, it is no different than suppression of free speech? nobody is policing each other. the government is okay with it the media is okay with it because they are comies. >> you are created richard next on dick aids later republicans hate you. they are more efficient. they are like the dog food that makes their own gravy. now they make their natural disasters and they clean it up. this is more efficient. >> it is like a snake creating its own tail as opposed to eating it. perhaps i should have moved on to joanne. joanne could you summarize what's going on here? >> yeah. a whole lot of awfulness.
7:42 pm
everybody is so upset about the chemical that is used and got the color right. you can't eat this it is bad for you. look at this. who knows down the road. >> by the way, it does look like pumpkin. >> liberal panel i am sure you have some kind of positive way to spin this. >> of course we do. we wanted to bright ten the river so the mexicans could cross it easier at night. that's why we wanted to do that. >> that is an interesting solution. >> time to take a break. when we come back it tells us about the court but first a word from our sponsor. >> it is brought to you by hot tub sal. follow follow the rules and get the heck out. thanks hot tub sal.
7:43 pm
hat maker vincent brimble prospered in the town of hattington. never flashy, he only made the classic bowler. then suddenly the day's trend became preposterously tall. his raymond james financial advisor reminded him that focusing on the long term is always fashionable. the fad was indeed a passing one. his patience paid off, allowing him to one-day hang up his hat with confidence. life well planned. see what a raymond james advisor can do for you.
7:44 pm
hi mi'm raph. tom. my name is anne. i'm one of the real live attorneys you can talk to through legalzoom. don't let unanswered legal questions hold you up, because we're here, we're here, and we've got your back. legalzoom. legal help is here. ♪ [music] jackie's heart attack didn't come with a warning. today her doctor has her on a bayer aspirin regimen to help reduce the risk of another one. if you've had a heart attack be sure to talk to your doctor before you begin an aspirin regimen.
7:45 pm
7:46 pm
oh, thank you,i like your place. make yourself at home i'll be right back. hm. she's got x1. alright. huh, hm, ohh... monster? she seemed so nice at dinner. i'm back! ahh! uhh... whatcha doing? ohh, just... watchin' law & order. awww, you're nervous. that's so cute. call and upgrade to get x1 today. ♪ >> this week's book, you noah. i don't know if i am pronounces it korpthly by canadian poet christian bach. each focuses on one vow it is
7:47 pm
written with words making that vow. the dawn that can watch can can girl cha-cha-cha as brass bands razz ma at thats. what a mast class act. sounds like a dream i had with cherry gatorade. ben gillette was here yesterday and i asked him what the book meant to him. >> explain what the book is. >> the book is a ship in a bottle. the reason you build a ship in the bottle is to build a ship in the bottle. then all of the beauty comes out from the fact that you are a nut who built a ship in the mott el. when i say chapter in a voil that uses only the voil. there is an a chapter that the only voil in the entire chapter is a, there's e, i, o and u.
7:48 pm
>> can i read? this is my favorite sentence from the e chapter. it goes on for pages. the sleek green eels feed themselves the excrement, the ex treated dregs that the surface breed themselves. all es. what you find is the voils themselves have a tone. the u chapter is butter rale. it has a lot of obscenities. if it took him ten years he made lists of words with voils in them. he had a file or es and oeshgs and in ten years he sat down and said i am going to write a book going from here. >> he tries to use each word that has just those voils in it once. there are certain words.
7:49 pm
>> this is a performance. >> there are certain words he must jump with joy. (speaking foreign language) >> he is sitting around with his friends going (speaking foreign language) this is great. >> he said voils have personality. somebody thinks tim they think skinny and pat they are over weight. >> bob. bob is budgey. >> when you really want to blow your mind. >> read it backwards? >> yeah. there is an audio book of this. >> i must get that. >> where christian bach reasons. open to a random page in here and try to read four sentences in a row at a good clip. >> it is like a precious metal that is so heavy and it is like
7:50 pm
the pewter censer spews the peppered set she feels perfected and fresh. >> give us a u. >> i am not going to do the us. i will lose my job. >> only two words you have to enjoy. >> boo-boo hugs ruth thus ruth purs. i believe ruth is a cat or a -- never mind. >> i find that when i am in kind of a nervous mood or something sitting in the bathtub reading this all of a sudden my mind is clear thinking there's somebody who had more anxiety than me. someone whose only joy is nightmare. >> this guy is wandering through the city. he is angry. it makes him upset.
7:51 pm
how can this be? this is natural? these voils are not over. >> it is adam and eve. >> it is the gay marriage issue. >> tell everybody where you can watch it. >> fool us and magicians come out and do their best tricks. if they can fool us they win if they can't fool us go away. we were asked by many people, did you notice the trophy you give them just said fu in big letters? i said, yeah, we did. >> nothing to do with the book. >> there you go. >> if you spell out you. >> none of the lower thirds were right by the way. mixing the voils like a wild orgy in san francisco. >> time to take a break.
7:52 pm
with he will check in with america's friendliest correspondent. if you leave now you will no longer receive a card from me. why do so many people choose aleve? it's the brand more doctors recommend for minor arthritis pain. plus, just two aleve can last all day. you'd need 6 tylenol arthritis to do that. aleve. all day strong. (vo)cars for crash survival,ning subaru has developed our most revolutionary feature yet. a car that can see trouble... ...and stop itself to avoid it. when the insurance institute for highway safety tested front crash prevention
7:53 pm
nobody beat subaru models with eyesight. not honda. not ford or any other brand. subaru eyesight. an extra set of eyes, every time you drive.
7:54 pm
so you're a small business expert from at&t? yeah, give me a problem and i've got the solution. well, we have 30 years of customer records. our cloud can keep them safe and accessible anywhere. my drivers don't have time to fill out forms. tablets. keep them all digital. we're looking to double our deliveries. our fleet apps will find the fastest route. oh, and your boysenberyy apple scones smell about done. ahh, you're good. i like to bake. with at&t get up to $400 dollars in total savings on tools to manage your business. sure! i offer multi-car, safe driver, and so many other discounts that people think i'm a big deal. and boy, are they right. ladies, i can share hundreds in savings with all of you! just visit today. but right now, it's choosing time.
7:55 pm
ooh! we have a winner. all: what? [chuckles] he's supposed to pick one of us. this is a joke, right? that was the whole point of us being here.
7:56 pm
>> you may know it as florida's friendliest home town. could it be the greatest place on earth. orlando was america's fastest growing city for the second year in a row. it is high time for a villages correspondent. because it isn't so busy, i got two. joining me is roger and ann. thank you for being here. let's get right to it. i have been hearing a lot about this game called pickle ball. what is going on in the villages? what is pickle ball? >> pickle ball is the greatest thing since sliced bread if you talk to a lot of people here. >> it is not some weird sex game? >> it is not a racket. it is a paddle.
7:57 pm
here is the ball. that is the noise it makes. >> that's quite interesting. does it take a special skill to play this game? >> well, some people say it's a skill of idea os see. other people say wanting to go out and have a great time and make good friends. >> is there any number one ranked player is there an andre agassi of pickle ball? >> if there is, i don't know who it is. i do know it is part of the senior games. national even joer games and the village has done very good with those. the game got started out west in seattle. >> enough about pickle ball. i have a question for you, what is the minimum age like when you move to the villages, what is the -- can you be 50? >> 55. >> 55. so when somebody is 50 -- >> somebody has to be 55 in the house. if a 55-year-old moves in he is married to a 35-year-old, how is that? >> that would work.
7:58 pm
>> as long as one person is 55. >> the man immediately goes that would work. >> it doesn't matter whether it's the he or the she that is 55. >> i have been in the villages three times i have always had a great time. you are getting a new performing arts center. >> it is here already. >> who is performing? >> it is absolutely awesome. >> we have met abobeen about fo five times. it is great. we are going in tomorrow night as a matter of fact. >> who do you see? >> we are going to see the orlando philharmonic orchestra. >> you know what with a would be great if it was fronted by the tony orlando. so tony orlando philharmonic. >> they have had -- it has only been open for about 3 and a half months and they have already had 8 sold out shows.
7:59 pm
michael bolton was coming to town -- came to town and his show, two of them sold out in four hours. >> wow. the he's coming back again i don't know what the date is. he's coming back again. i am sure he will do just as well. >> he's an american treasure and so are you two and so are the villages. we have to take off. excellent updateupdates. we know about pickle ball and performing arts center. i was going to ask you about any crime problems but we ran out of time. does the village have the town drunk? i would like to be the town drunk. we will talk about that next time. thank you roger and ann. always a pleasure. i just met them. i say that now. always a pleasure. >> always a pleasure to meet you, greg. >> just remember it's always a beautiful day here in the village. >> i think that's what they force you to say. but that's okay.
8:00 pm
>> thanks to gavin. john gab bore. father jonathan morris, marc cuban, katherine, joanne, the liberal panel. boy this show is packed. i am greg gutfeld. i love you america. a special edition of the o'reilly factor is on. tonight: >> mexico will pay for the wall. bill, bill? >> what are you going to do to nieto. what are you going to say to him? you have to pay for the wall to the tune of $2 billion? he is going to say hey. >> donald trump never afraid to enter the no spin zone and make must-see tv. we have the best of his head-to-head matches with with with bill on the factor. >> i am confident that i never sent nor received any information that was classified at the time it was sent and received. >> new polling shows just how much damage hillary clinton's email scandal is doing to her presidential campaign. and, she has plenty of reasons to worry. we will analyze the numbers tonight. >> the big names in the republican presidential race all making their


info Stream Only

Uploaded by TV Archive on