tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC November 19, 2010 12:05am-1:05am PST
time now for tonight's closing arguments. 17 months after filing for bankruptcy, general motors made a splashy return to the stock market today with executives ringing the opening bell on the new york stock exchange. gm shares closed at just above $34. the obama administration hailed the occasion as evidence that its $49 billion bailout of the company last year was working. so, tonight, we ask you, did the bailout work? was it worth it? tell us what you think at the "nightline" facebook page or on the "nightline" page at abcnews.com. and finally tonight, a tragic update from authorities in the search for three missing people in knox county, ohio,
today. >> we have discovered and recovered the remains of kody maynard, stephanie sprang and tina herrmann. >> the deceased included the mother and brother of sarah maynard, the 13-year-old girl who was found tied up in a basement on sunday. police said the man arrested in the case, matthew hoffman, had told them where to search. he's being held on a $1 million bail. that's our report for tonight. from all of us at abc news, good night, america. >> jimmy: hi, i'm jimmy kimmel with a word about wonderful pistachios. you know, if i've said it once, i've said it a billion times, opening a pistachio is just as much fun as eating them. everyone opens a pistachio in their own way. take guillermo, for instance -- guillermo, why are you on el roof? >> because jimmy i am about to
open a wonderful pistachio. watch. >> jimmy: okay. sometimes they preopen the bags on these sorts of things. >> attention people hollywood, i'm about to open a pistachio. stand clear! >> jimmy: all right. and -- >> do not eat the wonderful pistachio. it is mine. okay? >> jimmy: they probably won't. there he goes. isn't he adorable? i mean, just look at him. that's the front of our theater. >> wow! delicioso! i think i'll have one more. >> jimmy: oh, look, there he goes again. yeah. they -- i don't know if you're aware, but -- they call that running.
yeah. that's what that is. and i guess he'll get to the roof eventually. there, oh, there he is. >> attention people of hollywood! i am about to open another pistachio. stand clear! >> jimmy: not what you'd necessarily call practical but it keeps him in shape. >> i'm coming pistachio! >> dicky: wonderful pistachios. get crackin'. >> jimmy: "jimmy kimmel live," back in two minutes with bill carter, music from my chemical romance and robin quivers. [ male announcer ] at&t introduces a new windows phone...
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open until midnight or later. how smart is the new ford edge? well, it can show you the most fuel-efficient route to where you're going. it can find the best price on gas. show fuel prices. and now its v6 gets the best highway fuel economy in its class. say hello to the new ford edge. quite possibly the world's smartest crossover. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight -- from "the howard stern show," robin quivers. author bill carter.
and music from my chemical romance. with cleto and the cletones. ♪ it's "jimmy kimmel live" >> dicky: and now, for the most part, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you, cleto. thank you very muff. i'm jimmy. thanks for joining us. thanks for watching. i want to thank all of you who participated in national unfriend day yesterday. the numbers are in and thanks to our efforts, facebook users unfriended more than 60 million unwanted friends yesterday.
[ applause ] and how do i know that? i don't know that. i made that up. but it sounds good, right? sounds successful. national unfriend day was a big success. no one has any friends anymore. and that's what i wanted. my dream is that some day people will only be friends with their friends. i dream of a world where i don't have any idea what cities the guy i shared a junior high school locker with has visited in his adulthood. much like dr. martin looulter kimmel jr. the good news is, i've come up with a new social networking tool that you can use with your friends. it's called the telephone, and it amazing. i do feel bald for people who lost more friends than they unfriended. i've been hearing from some of them on twitter. losing friends, even fake facebook friends who aren't really your friends at all can come as a bit of a shock, so, i called a friend, a real friend, who is good with this sort of thing to help those who need it during this difficult time. >> hi, i'm dr. drew. being unfriended can be painful
and even disorienting. if you need help, don't be afraid to ask for it. >> how can i get past this and make new friends? >> when will the humiliation of being unfriended go away? >> why do i feel like such a loser? >> you can't, it won't and because you are, bitch. for national unfriend day, i'm dr. drew. >> jimmy: that's dr. drew. he has the guts to say the things that other doctors won't. [ applause ] unfriending is good for you. you know that feeling you get when you finally get around to cleaning out your garage and then it's clean for three weeks before you start filling it with crap again? this is the emotional version of that. the weemdweeds have been pulled. tonight, we say good-bye to the unfriended.
sounds like cookout. like having a hooray for herpes day. this is a day where smokers are encouraged to quit smoking. my cousin sal is very pro soaking people with a fire extinguisher and anti-smoking. he combined his passions to do his part to stop smoking once and for all. >> hey kevin? happy great american smokeout. do something about that hair, too. happy national smokeout. supposed to be a super hero for god sakes. set a good example. >> you definitely put me out. >> shut up. happy -- i'm saving your life, for crying out loud. >> [ bleep ]. get out of here. all right, enough is enough. stop it. stop it.
i'm not kidding around now. >> [ bleep ], stop it, okay? >> jimmy: thank you. [ applause ] thank you, cousin sal. why would he call a man baby? weird. you know? in other health-related news, it's asian people in face mask season again. that's right. in hong kong they just reported the first case of bird flu in seven years. and it not just any old bird flu, this one knows kung fu. we haven't had a good animal-themed flu pan nick almost a year now in response, the centers for disease control is recommending that americans avoid traveling to high risk areas and also, for the time being, refrain from having sex with chickens, so -- [ laughter ] done. the new "harry potter" movie, part one, opened at midnight tonight. and harry is a little bit older in this one. he's wiser. he has a love interest. three kids, a mini van, a
mortgage. it's not as much fun as the others, but you want to drive a little kid nuts? keep calling it larry potter over and over again. they hate it. this is the seventh of eight harry potter movies. they changed this a little from the book but there's no question that the villain in this film is harry's most formidable opponent yet. >> face nod greater threat than it does today. but you can't fight this war on your own, mr. potter. it's too strong. ♪ baby ♪ baby ♪ baby oh ♪ baby ♪ baby ♪ baby oh >> kill it! ♪ thought you'd always be mine >> the longer we stay here, the stronger he gets.
>> never say never! [ applause ] >> jimmy: well, that's a great way to see both movies at once. tonight, the classic peanuts special, "a charlie brown thanksgiving" aired here on abc, a week early for some reason. i don't mean any disrespect to pea nuts, i love the specials, but we've been seeing the same thing since 1973, so, we decided to spice them up a little bit by replacing the dialogue with the dialogue from this week's episode of "hell's killetchen." >> what's wrong with you? >> i'm trying to work, chef. >> look in my eyes when i'm talking to you. >> i might seem like a little dumby on the outside, but on the inside, i'm a cooking machine. >> wake up. you need to cook the rice longer in the stock. it's undercooked! >> i have never seen such chaos. >> what's wrong with you?
i'm not here to wipe your little butt. let's get out right. >> jimmy: it's better, right? [ applause ] more contemporary. hey, we got some great news here in hollywood this week. yesterday, a federal judge lifted the lapd's band on the costume characters who roam around outside our building, posing for pictures, to get money to buy liquor. they had been banned for a few months, but now they're back and infor one cannot be happier. i missed the smell of never washed chewbacca costumes around here. so, if you would please join me in officially welcoming back the hollywood bul varld costume characters. here they are. superman. superman. good to see you. the hulk. hulk, how are you? wonder woman. captain america.
cat woman. a transformer. the joker and spongebob squarepants. we salute you. welcome back. and we look forward to many years of companionship with you. is it -- is the door locked? oh, the door is locked. um -- if only they had some kind of superpowers to open it with. hulk, tear the door off the hinges. superman -- doors are his kryptonite. you know what, come back, just come back the way you came in, super heroes. [ applause ] or stay there, i don't -- there they are. the hollywood boulevard costume characters. thank you. great to see everyone. welcome back.
there you go. well -- it's like two pa raids for the price of one. [ applause ] let's get the applause down to nothing before they leave. and they're gone. that's right. [ applause ] it does smell in here now. only been back for a day. how can they already smell? i'm going to purell when we go to commercial. one more thing, it's thursday night, time for our weekly tribute to the fcc where we bleep and blur things whether they need it or not. it's "this week in unnecessary censorship." >> offensive line did keep you clean throughout the whole game. no sacks. why were they so effective? >> they're a bunch of tough guys and i try to [ bleep ] them well.
so -- hopefully that keeps them happy. >> i [ bleep ] about 2400 [ bleep ] and i couldn't thank people enough. >> national unfriend day, it's a day to weed through all the people you have brooep bloo[ bl facebook. >> during a recent concert, the band's guitarist zeently [ bleep ] a fan in the face. >> will be performing live on the american music awards this sunday night chlgt brew nope's [ bleep ] himself over there. >> let me tell you, spend ten minutes with me and i'll [ bleep ] your [ bleep ]. >> you still haven't [ bleep ] me. >> you never [ bleep ] me. >> wow. okay. >> like you haven't done that before, you [ bleep ] [ bleep ] somebody. >> never [ bleep ] [ bleep ] somebody. came close. >> carson, tell them what's coming up next. >> [ bleep ] school! >> that sounds great! >> hit the [ bleep ]. >> there you go. >> what did you learn on the street, because you talk about being 13 and [ bleep ]
[ bleep ]. did that teach you something? >> yes, of course. >> oh! i got something for thanksgiving table for you, me and wendy. >> jimmy: we have a good show for you tonight. from "the new york times," bill carter is here. we have music from my chemical romance, and we'll be right back with robin quivers, 0 stick around. dave(into the phone): the investors love the idea, but we have to tighten up the
business plan in two hours. yeah, we need everybody on this... all four: to the cloud. dave(vo): with the cloud, we share a synced folder that allows us to all work on the same documents. so now our chief marketing officer can tweak it. dave: ...our cfo can number-crunch it. dave(vo): ...our president can green-light it. dave: ...and our ceo ...can quit his day job. thank you, cloud. café server: can i come? dave(walking away): no! vo: to the cloud with windows live. to create and share. anywhere.
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>> jimmy: hi there. thank you for joining us. with us tonight, from "the new york times," author of this new book, "the war for late night: when leno went early and television went crazy" bill carter is here. among the many revelations in this book did you know jay leno once punched an old lady in the face for brushing up against his
desenberg? that's true. then later on, the kids have been lined up since early this morning. their first new album in four years. "danger days: the true lives of the fabulous killjoys" comes out monday. my chemical romance from the bud light outdoor stage. next week on the show, dave salm salmoni will be here with amazing animals. billy bob thornton will join us. we'll talk to the new champion from "dancing with the stars," who better not be bristol palin. "cast "castle's" stana katic will be here, dominick mon that than, as well. and music from metric, ke$ha, and train. for almost 30 years, our first guest has served as news anchor, co-conspirator, vegetable lover, and, on occasion, the voice of reason on "the howard stern show." listen to it every morning and all day long on sirius xm satellite radio and join her live and in person at an art exhibit and auction to benefit the 15 foundation at the villagio hotel in napa november 27th. please welcome robin quivers.
[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you look fantastic. >> why thank you. >> jimmy: you really look grade. i know you changed your life. you ran the new york city marath marathon. >> i did. >> jimmy: the whole thing. [ applause ] >> all 26.2 miles of it. yes. >> jimmy: it's funny, because i honestly, i always think about, it's 26 miles and i think, the .2 would be enough of a problem for me. you can't forget that. >> why do they tack on the .2? >> jimmy: it seems unnecessary. >> 26 miles is enough. >> jimmy: that's more than enough. you trained -- did you train for a long time? >> about six months. >> jimmy: is that typical or is that -- >> that's what they told me you needed to do. >> jimmy: you had a guy, like, helping you? >> i had a coach who was running with me several times a week and inhad some long runs on my own
but they said, yeah, six months is a good amount of time to train for a marathon. >> jimmy: did your coach run with you at the marathon? >> he did. he's one of the crazy triathletes and getting ready for an ironman competition so this was just a little run for him. >> jimmy: easy for him? >> he was -- when i was struggling and i would have to stop to walk, he was dancing. they would have bands on the side of the road, and he would be -- do you like to dance? >> jimmy: that's annoying. that's very annoying. >> absolutely. >> jimmy: did you stop at all? >> i did. in fact, you know, you have to -- when you get up to running several hours, you have to eat while, you know, you have to take care of your daily -- >> jimmy: i would eat a whole roast beef on the way. >> on the road, as you're running. and i was trying to survive on these crazy gels which are just these syrupy sweet sticky things and it wasn't doing me any good. i said, i need real food. i need a bagel. and they don't have, you know,
there's no food. >> jimmy: no one handing those out on the course? >> so, i left the race course. we're in manhattan. we figured, just walk out the barricade, you are find a bagel and we'll get back in. we found the one block in new york where there was no bagel store. so i walked a couple of blocks before i could -- >> jimmy: you went and found a bagel -- >> i had to. i would have never finished the race. i was at mile 15 -- >> jimmy: wait a minute. is that -- did you technically run the marathon? by the way, that's -- >> everybody keeps says, you know, that was illegal -- they weren't expecting me to win the race, so, i didn't -- >> jimmy: you didn't win, right? the kenyans win because they never stop. >> they don't stop for anything. they -- what took me six hours and 13 minutes to do, the winning runner, he did it in two hours and eight minutes. >> jimmy: unbelievable. >> crazy. >> jimmy: they don't have cars in kenya, so they have to -- their feet are their form of
transportation. >> they really have to do that. i don't know why we're doing that. >> jimmy: you are a vegan now. how long have you been -- >> about four years. >> jimmy: four years. [ applause ] >> thank you, thank you. >> jimmy: that guy clapping is not a vegan, by the way. i don't know -- you're not a vegan. >> he was slapping two pieces of meat together. >> jimmy: technically, i guess he was. but do you feel like, i mean, that has made you more energetic -- >> everybody has this imagination that if they are not eating this substantial food that they normally eat that they're going to die. and that's not the case. i do, i have more energy, i love the way i eat, i don't even like that puffy full feeling anymore. >> jimmy: i love it. >> i know. that's what everybody is going for when they sit down. i don't even like that. >> jimmy: my colon feels like it's filled with insulation. it's incredible. little pieces of glass in there. >> all kinds of things in there. >> jimmy: you've been on a lot
of diets. we have a list. the master cleanse. juice diet. martha's vineyard diet detox. the 21-day fast. fat burning beads taped to the ears. >> that was an experiment. i was just checking that out. >> jimmy: coffee enemas. >> of course. i went to guatemala -- and they grow coffee there. and they kept trying to offer me cups, i said, that's not what i do with it. >> jimmy: i need it in a hose. >> absolutely. >> jimmy: you were on the riker's island diet. >> the riker's island diet? >> jimmy: the kitten diet, which is nothing but milk and yarn. that was not -- >> that was not me. >> jimmy: but this is the one. this, for you -- >> i love the way i eat. i never want to go back. i, you know, i've had people say to me, what do you miss, and i only miss something occasionally if i actually see -- >> jimmy: bacon. >> i never liked bacon even when
i wasn't -- >> jimmy: oh -- i'm having my bacon heart attack right now. >> you know what, i got -- i was in this little place called lambertville, new jersey, once, we were at a reception, and they were passing bacon as an hors d'oeuvre. big piles of bacon walking around on silver platters and people were grabbing it -- >> jimmy: of course they were, it's bacon. i like that. nobody -- you don't need the lettuce and the tomato. right for the bacon. >> absolutely. >> jimmy: will you have an lt sandwich? >> sure. >> jimmy: that's terrible. >> no, that's wonderful. what kind of life is this? >> you know what, vegetables, they run the span of texture, taste -- >> jimmy: boyfriends. >> oh, gosh, you're terrible. >> jimmy: that's probably -- we probably shouldn't go into that. >> really. >> jimmy: nothing is sacred. >> i was very young. >> jimmy: your personal life
is -- everything you do is subject to examination. even your 15 foundation, which is a great thing you do, charity is very positive -- >> you love that. >> jimmy: i just think it's crazy. i listen to, you know, you're going to guatemala, the countries and helping people and all you get is abuse. >> yes, absolutely. because the people on my show have such big hearts. they really care. >> jimmy: and, well, i think they probably do, but it's beyond, you know, like, for instance, howard would probably not go to guatemala and live in a hut. >> oh, no. we went to the home of a guatemalan family and they served us food and i ate it. and howard said, are you out of your mind? what is that? >> jimmy: well, it seems to be keeping them alive. >> and they were so sweet and gracious. >> jimmy: but people don't understand that. what do you guys do, the 15 foundation? what is the primary -- >> we actually put the 15 foundation together to help
organizations that have targeted problems of children in this country right now -- >> jimmy: we have to get rid of the children. >> effective solutions -- not to get rid of them. it's to help them develop. >> jimmy: to help them develop. that's great. that's great. >> and so we actually target people who have wonderful ideas that are great solutions to some of the problems we see today and we try to shine a little light on them and raise the money for them. >> jimmy: and that's why you ran the marathon in the first place. >> for two organization, the sylvia center and family cook productions, who teach children about nutritious. >> jimmy: great. now, speaking of athletics, we had an incident here on the show a week ago today, well, here's what happened. let's show what happened. that's gary dell bat tee. it's a long story, but he's had some well publicized difficulties -- but you brought -- >> why did you stand in the audience when you had gary pitching? >> jimmy: just stupidity, i don't know. i thought -- i really thought he
would throw it to me. but you brought a glove -- is this yours? this is not my glove. >> jimmy: all right, well -- here you go. >> no, no, no, hold it, hold it -- >> why did you bring a glove? >> i was just going to make a joke. >> jimmy: oh, no, no, no. one time. >> i don't even know how to put on a glove. >> jimmy: you don't need the glove. there's the line right back there. >> i should just walk out. >> jimmy: if you left there's nothing we could do. all right. in high heels, by the way. i want to point out. robin is wearing high heels. >> i'll never get it that far. can i cheat a little bit? >> jimmy: yeah, you can move a little bit. that's fine. you're in heels for god's sake. wow. sorry, gary. robin quivers, everybody.
hey hey hey! let's stall 'em. i just found some bud light in the back. here we go. we demand a helicopter. [ policeman ] got it. ah, wha?! we demand a hovercraft. a pipe organ. [ organ music plays ] a siberian endangered lynx and my old high school track coach, mr. gill. [ roars ] hey, guys! aaww. they're good. [ male announcer ] it's the sure sign of a good time. the just right taste of bud light. here we go. this is the number to the hideout. just give me a call whenever, okay? [ female announcer ] scope outlast. it's about time for a mouthwash that lasts even longer. now that fresh breath feeling lasts up to 5 times longer. what will you outlast? give her a cozy throw for a comfortable price. give him a chambray shirt that's surely a steal. give her a beautiful bag that's a great buy. give him a watch he'll love for less than you think.
yeah! i thought we'd eat at hey, you ghome. save some money. $200 bucks? that's not saving! [jacks voice] at my place i'm bringing back the bonus jack. two patties, melting cheese and my secret sauce plus fries and a drink for only $3.99. i get it. you can eat lot cheaper atouar placthan y c]n at home. but do have this? i have dessert. what about this? ohhh. ohhhhhh. jack. that's for max.
>> jimmy: still to come, my chemical romance will be here. we're just getting some bad news from new york. baba booey just jumped off the ra-ra-roofy and he will be missed. when it comes to late night television, our next guest knows all and sees all and then he writes all. he is the author of the book that became a movie "the late shift." his follow up, 16 years later is called "the war for late night: when leno went early and television went crazy." from "the new york times," please welcome bill carter. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: good to see you. i'd like to begin with a passage from your book. >> i think i know the one.
>> jimmy: page 121. kimmel didn't fit the usual phys physical prerequisites of a tv star. not really overweight but slightly puffy. he looked less like a leading man and a relaxed fit jeans model. hooded eyes that made him look sleepy. jimmy didn't figure to win a lot of face roles from casting directors or style points from the fashion police. but he made up for those shortcoming with spirit. thanks, bill. >> well -- [ cheers and applause ] i like -- >> jimmy: is that necessary to describe what i look like? anyone buying this book has a decent idea of what i look like. >> yeah, but it's an artist's -- >> jimmy: yes. years from now people will know i was puffy. i was originally p-diddy and
then turned to puffy. thank you for that description. >> i said nice things about you. >> jimmy: there are many nice things. let me tell you, if you are interested in late night tv and i presume if people are watching, they've passed out or -- >> especially if they are watching with me on. >> jimmy: that's right. a lot of stuff that, even i didn't know and i know a lot of the stuff that goes on because sometimes it involves me. but you managed to -- did you talk to everybody that you wanted to talk to for this book? >> everybody but one. >> jimmy: who was the one? >> dave. >> jimmy: letterman. >> yeah. >> jimmy: he has no time for this kind of thing. >> he doesn't want to be involved. >> jimmy: did that surprise you? >> not really. >> jimmy: did you talk to him for "the late shift?" >> extensively. he liked it. but he's not cooperating with the press much anymore. >> jimmy: i guess it is kind of a no-win type of deal. the first book was about the struggle between letterman and leno. and this centers around the
struggle between conan o'brien and jay. and there seems to be a recurring theme there to me. >> there is a theme. it seems like one person plays a role in every one of these events. >> jimmy: is jay leno the devil? let's get right to that. >> no, he does seem to always be there. maybe a vampire. >> jimmy: i think -- well, i guess you probably wouldn't say who the villain is in the book. jeff zucker, who is the head of nbc, he -- >> he's cast that way. but i think -- it wasn't from evil intent, it was just kind of being bone headed, i guess. >> jimmy: yeah. you have heard from him since you wrote the book? >> his people. >> jimmy: his people. they liked it? >> they were okay with it. >> jimmy: they were? wow. >> they said, hard to read and relive but accurate and well told. >> jimmy: there you go. and jay leno, in the first book, i guess -- maybe the thing people remember the most is him hiding in the closet, listening to the nbc executives talk about him. he's not in the closet in this one. >> i don't know what that means,
but yeah, no. at least he didn't tell me that. he did talk to me at great length. >> jimmy: he did? >> as did most of the other players including yourself. >> jimmy: yes, we talked a lot. i love hearing all of this stuff. >> and he was, you know, certainly chastened by the experience. he was feeling it when i talked to jay. he was not happy. >> jimmy: what i came away from the book is i feel like conan was treated very badly by nbc. >> yeah. i think he was because they promised him the show. five years ago. they started this thing to say, five years will get "the tonight show" if you give up being on fox or somewhere else. he agreed to that and played by all the rules, did what they wanted and first they moved jay to 10:00 ahead of him and then -- >> jimmy: how did that go? >> that didn't go well at all. in fact, one of the things i learned myself in the reporting was, you know, it seemed like he had -- it faded in three months. but it was six weeks, the stations wanted him off the air, it was doing so badly. they decided to put him back at
11:30 and that was it. >> jimmy: that's when conan said good-bye. >> basically, yeah. >> jimmy: and, that's a decision that -- i can't tell if you agree with that or not from the book. >> i don't think we're going to know this for awhile. it's a hard one to say. is he better off staying at a network or moving to a new -- he feels good about it. he feels free and that's good. he's certainly feeling comfortable in his decision. >> jimmy: well, you know, the interesting thing, one of the interesting things about the book is, where do you end it? at a certain point, you have to turn it in but the story continues. >> it's television man, it's on every night. it never stops. >> jimmy: the book came out on the same night that conan's show went on. >> interesting kwinls dense. >> jimmy: will the paper back version will more things -- >> yes. there are going to be more things. we're going to see, how does conan affect the guys that are on already. first week, he did really well. is that going to continue, or maybe not? >> jimmy: you never know. >> no. what i like about it is that it is constantly changing and i can continue to write, as long as
there are more bone headed decisions. >> jimmy: did jay read the book? >> i believe he has. his people have contacted me. >> jimmy: did they like the depiction in the book? >> they were nice about it. >> jimmy: that's how they operate. >> that's true. what about you? what did you think? >> jimmy: i thought it was great. nothing seemed wrong to me. i think it's right on. there are a lot of very interesting things in the book and you certainly know late night television. when did you -- when did it light your young flame. were you a kid? >> well, i watched carson, i was into carson. not crazy, like, maybe some people were and then dave really changed the picture. i started at "the new york times" and somebody said to me, you know, this is a great story, you should pay attention to it. one of the producers from letterman, robert morton. you're going to find out stuff you didn't realize. i started digging, and i thought it was -- i loved it. i thought the daily aspect of
it, you get to know these guys. people think they know you, because you're on evernigy nigh. if you do anything that gets in the press, they go crazy about it. when this thing broke it was -- it was the talk of the nation. >> jimmy: when i had my sex change operation i didn't think anyone would care. but i couldn't have been more wrong. will there be a movie made of this one? >> there's no deal yet. >> jimmy: who will play me? can i request denzel washington? >> i was going to -- i was going to suggest -- [ applause ] that would be good. i was going to suggest matt damon for you. >> that would be good. if he could lose a few pounds he would be perfect. well, again, if you're interested in late night television this is the book to read. "the war for late night" is in stores now. bill carter, everybody. we'll be right back with my chemical romance.
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out monday, it's called "danger days: the true lives of the fabulous killjoys." here with the song "na na na," my chemical romance. ♪ ♪ na -na -na -na -na -na -na na-na-na-na-na na -na -na -na -na -na -na na-na-na-na-na ♪ ♪ na -na -na -na na na -na na-na-na-na-na na -na -na -na -na ♪ ♪ drugs gimme drugs gimme drugs i don't need it ♪ ♪ but i'll sell what you got take the cash and i'll keep it ♪ ♪ eight legs to the wall hit the gas kill em all and we crawl and we crawl and we crawl ♪ ♪ you be my detonator love give me love give me love i don't need it ♪ ♪ but i'll take what i want from your heart and i'll keep it in a bag ♪ ♪ in a box put an "x" on the floor give me more give me more ♪ ♪ give me more shut up and sing it with me na -na -na -na -na -na -na from mall security ♪ ♪ na -na -na -na -na -na -na
to every enemy na -na -na -na -na -na -na na -na -na -na -na-na we're on your property ♪ ♪ standing in "v" formation na -na -na -na -na -na -na let's blow an artery ♪ m na -na -na -na -na -na -na eat plastic surgery na -na -na -na -na -na -na keep your apology give us more ♪ ♪ detonation more give me more give me more did i ever tell you ♪ ♪ 'bout the sad man shut up and let me see your jazz hands remember when you were a madman mad mad mad mad ♪ ♪ thought you was batman and hit the party with a gas can kiss me you animal you run the company ♪ i think we'd rather be burning your information ♪ ♪ lets blow an artery eat plastic surgery keep your apology give us more ♪ ♪ detonation
right here ♪ ♪ right now ♪ all the way in battery city ♪ little children ♪ raise their open filthy palms ♪ ♪ like tiny daggers up to hea n heaven ♪ everybody wants to change the world everybody wants to change the world ♪ ♪ but no one no one wants to die wanna try wanna try ♪ ♪ within wana try wanna try wanna try i'll be your detonator ♪ ♪ make no apology its death or victory on my authority crash and burn ♪ ♪ young and loaded
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