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tv   Jimmy Kimmel Live  ABC  January 4, 2011 1:05am-2:05am PDT

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and it's time now for tonight's "closing arguments." the u.s. navy announced this evening that captain owen honors would be temporarily relieved of his command of the "uss enterprise" carrier pending the investigation of lewd videos he's said to have produced in 2006 and 2007. the videos contained references to homosexuals, some profanity and pretty crude behavior.
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sailors jumped to his defense. saying it provided comic relief during long deployments in a time of war. the navy call those videos inappropriate. tonight we wanted to ask you, should honors have been suspended? or worse? does the punishment fit the alleged crime here? what do you think? we've already heard from many of you on facebook and twitter tonight. tell us what you think of the "nightline" facebook page or at abcnews.c that's our report for tonight. for all of us at abc news, good night, america. jimmy: hi, i'm jimmy kimmel, with my festive friend guillermo and a message from applebee's neighborhood grill and bar which has some delicious new additions to their unbelievably great tasting and under 550 calorie menu. >> guillermo: that's good news jimmy, because my new year's resolution is to eat better and lose weight. >> jimmy: well, then you're going to love the new teriyaki
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chicken pasta. >> guillermo: wow, that's good! and there's so much food! >> jimmy: there's also the new signature sirloin with garlic herb shrimp. >> guillermo: that's good. i will eat this one too. >> jimmy: you're going to eat both? >> guillermo: yes. i will eat this too. >> jimmy: what does it say on the cue cards? >> guillermo: don't worry. they are under 550 calories, jimmy. >> jimmy: so is the asiago peppercorn steak and the grilled chicken dijon and portobello. >> guillermo: dijon chicken? i will eat them all right now and lose lots of weight. and next year, i will be pipple magazine's sexiest man alive! >> jimmy: pipple?
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>> dicky: applebee's unbelievably great tasting and under 550 calorie menu. all of the taste, none of the trade-offs. >> jimmy: jimmy kimmel live is back in two minutes with the bachelor brad womack, music from josh groban and patricia heaton. okay. new year, new me. got to cut back. i love cutting back. [ male announcer ] it's all the taste and none of the tradeoffs. it's applebee's unbelievably great tasting and under 550 calories menu. great tasting generous new dishes starting at $8.99. only at applebee's. open until midnight or later. great tasting generous new dishes starting at $8.99. i can't reach the remote. ♪ [ male announcer ] thankfully, it even works on the man-cold.
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not as good as chocolate filled with caramel. introducing milky way simply caramel. life's better the milky way. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- from "the middle," patricia heaton. the bachelor brad womack. and music from josh groban. with cleto and the cletones. ♪ it's jimmy kimmel live and now, once again, here's jimmy kimmel!
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♪ >> jimmy: thank you very much. i'm jimmy. thanks for coming. thank you for watching. and allow me to be the first to wish you a happy new year. [ cheers and applause ] my new year's resolution this year, same as last year, which is eat more gluten. that's right. [ laughter ] what even is gluten? why is people so against it? [ laughter ] the first two weeks of january, typically when people try to lose weight. and it's a golden time of the year for me because the line at sizzler is much shorter. [ laughter ] all the chick peas i want. but i don't understand why people resolve to lose weight? because when you do this, you always gain it back. you should resolve to lose something more realistic like
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keys. [ laughter ] this year, i'm going to lose 35 keys. [ laughter ] it's been raining here in l.a. hard for the past couple of weeks. which is unacceptable. on behalf of the chamber of commerce, i apologize to those of you visiting. but it's cold -- the whole city smells like moist uggs. it's not -- [ laughter ] and we are very, very much against weather here in southern california. i was forced to scrape rain off my windshield this morning. [ laughter ] i don't like it. but we're lucky compared to most of the country. new york city got hit with 20 inches of snow over the break. flights were canceled. this is a kid in long island who was hoping to get to florida to enjoy his winter vacation. >> thousands of passengers across the east coast of course had to ator the ealter their pl. we spoke to one kid coping with the delay. >> i'm just sitting there on my i-pod. it's just so frustrating. i want to be in florida getting a tan on my back. [ laughter ]
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>> jimmy: some broads around me and maybe a mojito in my hand. i blame snooki for that, by the way. the bad weather on the west coast cleared up in time for the roetz parade in pasadena. any of you go to this rose para parade? really? personally are i can't imagine waking up at 4:00 in the morning after new year's eve to watch flowers walk down the road. but the rose parade's been going on for 122 years. it's the longest running rose parade in all of pasadena. [ laughter ] it aired live on television here on our ktla. bob eubanks hosted with stephanie edwards. stephanie edwards provided us with 2011's first unintentional joke of the day. enjoy. >> i was reading the other day about the fact that faces used to be done with flower petals but flower petals decay. jim came up with the crushed walnuts and other ideas of using
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nuts to keep the faces looking good. >> well look at that. >> i'm going to apply some nuts to my face this year. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: well, that's a heck of a resolution. [ applause ] may i see, your husband is a lucky man. [ laughter ] as of today, we have a new governor in california. former governor jerry brown replaces arnold schwarzenegger. i don't know if i'm comfortable with a governor who's never done steroids. i don't feel as safe. and who can pronounce things. the experts have been very critical of arnold schwarzenegger for the job he did but i don't necessarily agree. this is a tough situation. maybe he didn't solve any of the major problems. in fact, things have gotten even worse. when you consider the fact that for the last seven years arnold schwarzenegger has been the governor of our state, things could be a lot worse. no major earthquakes on his
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watch. that's something, right? arnold said he might go back to acting. he might write a memoir. and if he does, i think i have a good title for it. i'll be book. right? i'm gonna miss the governor. he was the funniest governor anyone could ever realistically hope for. tonight, we say a fond farewell to a man who provided us with more entertainment than any of us deserve really. >> we're going to deliver a victory for california. california. california. california. california. i have lived in the fantasy world and i was terminator. i did what the terminator was supposed to do. terminate the lawsuit. terminator keeps his promises. you are the true terminator. i will be the collect-inator. speaking of acting, one of my movies was called true lies. conan the barbarian. twins. commando. 70% just never forgave me for my movie herculeses in new york.
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the other 20% just never forgave me for my movie herculeses in new york. 30% just want to have their money back for my movie jingle all the way. today i'm here to pump you up. i had a chance to pump them up. got to pump up. i'm all pumped up. a pump isser with than coming. is a bump better than coming. central valley, the abs. i always say that whenever there's smoke, there's fire. i've never grabbed anyone. >> you deny all those stories about grabbing? >> no, not at all. californians always say i'll be back. i'll be back. i'll be back. i'll be back. i'll be back. i'll be back. i'll be back. i'll be back. and i said, i'll be back. so we're here back again and it's nice to be back here. for those that were gaming the system, i say hasta la vista. hasta la vista to prejudice. hasta la vista to the dance. hasta la vista, baby.
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hasta la vista, baby. i changed my mind. i want to go back to acting. baby. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: see you in the white house, big guy. i'm gonna miss him. i always teared up. also leaving us to start the new year, quarterback brett favre. after 20 years in the nfl, favre sat out minnesota's season in the loss to the lions yesterday with a concussion. after the gape, announced his retirement for the third time. this is his re-re-reretirement. he said his body just can't take all the retiring anymore. so, you know, when you retire from the vikings, they make you drift out in a boat and then they shoot it with a flaming arrow so this retirement should stick. brett favre looks a lot like the new bachelor. has anyone else noticed that? new season of the bachelor began tonight. the guy they selected is, dare i say, the most dramatic the
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bachelor selection ever. >> last season, we brought you abc's the bachelor on the wings of love. >> will you marry me? >> yes. >> this season, say hello to the most provocative bachelor yet. >> ladies, your bachelor runs his own multimillion-dollar business empire. get ready for the most fabulous bachelor ever. >> hello, ladies! >> perez hilton is the bachelor. >> you all look so [ bleep ] tonight. i've never had any trouble attracting women. but for some reason, things just haven't clicked. ow. careful with my hair, bitches. >> on the inside, has the soul of an artist. >> all done. >> it's amazing. >> he has this raw animal passion that is totally
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irresistible. >> i know the woman of my dreams is out there. if i don't take this opportunity to reach out and grab her, i probably never will. i want it all. and i intend to find it. >> perez, it's time to make a decision. who will it be? [ laughter ] and your hand is on my ass. >> abc's the bachelor. and this summer perez hilton is the bachelorette. only on abc. >> ahh! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i hear he gets two women pregnant so. no, no, no, we're just being foolish. perez hilton is not the new batch already. the new bachelor is brad womack who already was the bachelor in season 11. 15 seasons of this show? no marriages, right? they say recycling bachelors is good for the environment.
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they invited brad back because he didn't pick either of the final two girls. but this time around, he has more women to choose from, like this young lady with vampire teeth. >> my conversation with madison is interesting. there's something that i really like about this girl. she has these very sexy unique look. but on the same hand, the girl has fangs. >> jimmy: well, that is a consideration to be made. she has fangs. [ laughter ] brad spent most of the show apologizing. which i think is ridiculous. i'm going to scold him for it when he gets out here later. i don't understand what he's apologizing for. you're supposed to pretend you want to marry the girl and quietly break up with her in three months? that's not how it -- oh, yeah, that is how it works. brad will be here later for some deprogramming and hard-core womacking while we're at it too. this is weird. in arkansas, thousand, of birds suddenly fell dead from the sky. they estimate between 4,000 and
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5,000 blackbirds and starlings studdenly just fell and they're not sure why. i think it's pretty obvious. god is also addicted to angry birds but -- he's sling shotting them to try to kill the little -- the pigs. this comes on the heels of 100,000 fish suddenly washing up dead in arkansas. what a fun vacation spot, you know? needless to say, this is what they call cause for concern. >> the new year is off to a bizarre beginning in arkansas. 100,000 drumfish washed up along the arkansas river. scientists say disease is likely to blame. on their own, dead fish may not raise too many eyebrows. a little more than 100 miles away in beebe, there's another animal mystery. before the stroke of midnight on new year's eve, thousands of birds started falling from the sky. >> i thought it was out a albert hitch comb movie. [ laughter ] hitchcock movie. >> jimmy: albert?
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the guy's a regular alfred einstein there. so that might explain why they're having trouble figuring this out. [ laughter ] you know, we've got -- we have a good show for you tonight. i mentioned the bachelor is going to be here. patricia heaton will be here from "the middle." and josh groban. i want to mention josh groban has a new album out. he's been doing some interesting things. josh is actually taking words from another high-profile performer. not songs but words. he's made into lyrics and put to music. it's kind of the reverse of a cover album. it's hard to explain. he's promoting this album with a television commercial. i have a feeling -- i really think this is going to put him back in the grammy race for next year too. >> he sold more than 20 million albums worldwide. and now oscar and grammy nominee josh groban releases his most anticipated album yet. >> oh, hello there. i'm oscar and grammy nominated singer josh groban.
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if you love kanye west tweets as much as i do, you are going to love my new album. >> josh groban's the beast tweets of kanye west. ♪ can we please toast ♪ to the [ bleep ] dush bags ♪ do you know where to find ♪ marble con fence tables ♪ i'm looking to have a conference ♪ ♪ but not until i get the table ♪ >> at most, his tweets are 140 characters but the depth of his passion, is immeasurable. ♪ fur pillows ♪ are hard to actually sleep on ♪ ♪ man ♪ whatever happened to my
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antique fish tank ♪ >> you'll get all of your favorites. ♪ classical music is tight yo ♪ i make awesome decisions in bike stores ♪ ♪ french fries are the devil ♪ black is the new black >> and many, many more. josh groban's the best tweets of kanye west includes 752 original songs. and 48 cds. ♪ i love me ♪ eeeee >> in stores now. >> jimmy: we have a good show tonight. music from josh groban. the first ever two time bachelor brad womack. we'll be right back with patricia heaton so stick around. [ female announcer ] here comes oatmeal at mcdonald's.
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[ wife ] that's good. that's 3 hours. it says my freshman roommate's name is jake. she sounds nice. it says it's a self portrait. really? [ guy ] it says he's david paymer. oh, okay. yeah. [ kid ] it says you have 4 million hits. [ male announcer ] at&t feels every family should have access on the go. so we're introducing smartphone data plans for the family. now at a more affordable $15 per line. at&t. rethink possible. now get the motorola bravo for only $49.99. at&t. rethink possible. how's it going? good. have you seen this?? this is the best bike we have. - top spec gears, superlight frame. - i love it!
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>> jimmy: i want to look just perfect. thank you for having me in your home with us tonight. earlier tonight, he began his second tour of duty as the bachelor. the first time he was bachelor, he didn't pick anyone, and he's back to waste everyone's time again. the bachelor brad womack is here. then later, this is his fifth album, "illumination." tonight, he will be singing in my native language -- portuguese. josh groban from the bud light stage. josh groban. tomorrow night, matt leblanc and julie benz. and later this week simon baker, snooki, amy adams. and music from lloyd banks. join us all this week, if you'll be so kind. our first guest knows her way around a family. she has her own and two from tv. her big hit show "the middle" airs wednesday nights at 8:00 on abc.
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>> i have tripped over my last tennis ball. sat on my last joystick. you guys are going to start keeping all your crap in your room. dig in this pile for what's yours because anything left is going in the trash. >> oh, my gosh, what did you do to family room! what did you do to the family room! >> you like it? i've always wanted it this way. >> no, i don't like it. it's like you're trying to pretend you never had us! >> jimmy: please say hello to patricia heaton. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ you look fantastic. thank you for coming. >> you look thin. are you losing weight. >> jimmy: it's inmy new year's
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resolution. i'm plan to put it all back on by july. >> that's easier. >> jimmy: do you make resolutions? >> it's one of those things. it's like being a cleveland browns supporter. you kind of do it because you should but you know you're going to be disappointed. you know? so yeah, so, you know, i'm trying to make more lists so i get things done and i don't procrastinate. i did the classic hollywood thing of joining a gym. >> jimmy: oh, you did? >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: do you like going to the gym? no, it's terrible. >> this one, when i joined, there was a guy right by the table -- where the entrance is. and it said, check your fat. your fat percentage. see how fat you are. >> jimmy: not actually check it? just leave it there. >> you take a fat test. i was like, all right, i'll do it. you hold -- it looks like a controller for a video game. i guess apparently through your thumbs they can tell. they ask your height and weight and all this stuff. i seem to be 4% away from being
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low-end morbidly obese. >> jimmy: no. what? >> yeah. i was like really? >> jimmy: no way. really? maybe you have chubby thumbs. let me look at your thumbs. >> i don't know if it's sort of like a hollywood thing. i mean, it's funny that they do it right between christmas and new year's when you're pigging out and feeling guilty about it and you're just joining the gym. it's like, gee, would you like to sign up for a trainer? >> jimmy: that's criminal activity is what that is. >> i know. >> jimmy: wow. >> i'm going to try it. i've been spinning. going spinning and -- >> jimmy: spinning, yeah, that's terrific huh? everybody just rides a bike and no one moves. >> yeah. yeah, yeah. they really should attach all those bikes to generators because we could solve the energy crisis for that spinning class alone. >> jimmy: it's hard -- well you're working full time and you have -- how many kids, four kids, right? >> four. >> jimmy: all boys. >> 11, 13, 15 and 17, yeah. >> jimmy: how do you keep them from murdering each other? >> well, like this -- you know how rainy it's been this
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christmas. >> jimmy: yeah. >> and so we -- we were supposed to go to england to see my husband's family. and we got -- all our flights got canceled because they had these big ice storms in england. >> jimmy: oh, right. >> so we had to stay home. and we pretty much let them play video games 24/7. >> jimmy: you did? >> for two weeks straight. >> jimmy: really? >> yeah. >> jimmy: so did they go have their thumbs tested? >> yeah, yeah. but you know what was interesting, on new year's eve day, we all went skeet shooting for the first time out in -- >> jimmy: oh, up north on the 405, right? >> yes. >> jimmy: i go there with my son sometimes. >> more and more? >> jimmy: we've killed many a skeet up there. >> first time. so we went. they'd never done it before. and they're up there. the guy shows them the rudimentary things to do. and they're like, pull. boom, boom, boom. and they got everyone. they were blowing things out of the sky. >> jimmy: that's exactly what happened with my son. i've got a trained killer in my house.
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[ laughter ] this is like the only benefit of video games. >> i know. i'm like -- my eye/hand coordination and my response time is so slow. there's like -- skeets are all over the place. i was just trying to find it. >> jimmy: if the taliban had any idea that we have a nation of trained 12-year-old killers, we would never hear from them again. >> sharpshooters, yes. i actually for the first time thought, we should keep loaded rifles under our beds. >> jimmy: sure, of course you should. especially with four boys in the house. they'll never touch them. it will be fine. >> i used to be scared of guns. now it's like, hey, this is kind of cool. >> jimmy: it is fun to go skeet shooting. did you bruise yourself? >> it wasn't too bad. ooh, sorry. wait, what is the smaller gun? the higher the number, the smaller the thing, right? i had like a 20-gauge and they had like a 12. is that right? >> jimmy: i don't really know. i wish i was more -- >> -- clear things that i don't know what i'm talking about. >> jimmy: cleto's dad when we were growing up had a gun in the closet that cleto and i would
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help ourselves to while he was at work. if there were kites in the neighborhood, we would shoot them. >> kite shooting? >> jimmy: because we never really thought about the fact that the bbs come down at some point. >> yeah. take it to the beach. >> jimmy: yeah, that's a fun thing too. seagulls instead of kites. >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: so your husband's family is from england. which makes him english, complete lie, right? >> he's completely english, he has the accent. we tried to do -- he wanted to go to england to have a real english christmas. we weren't able to go. they do things -- like they have figgy puddings. >> jimmy: i've always wanted a figgy pudding. >> they have another dessert, you know what it's called, spotted dick. >> jimmy: i've heard of that. that i don't want as much. figgy pudding sounds more delightful. do your kids appreciate, like, other cultures or are they -- >> well, they really -- you know, we watch a lot of the british comedies and stuff like that. >> jimmy: okay. >> but i feel like i -- i wanted
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them to learn to be like more hospitable and get kind of outside of themselves. and so i kind of insisted that we host a foreign exchange student at our house last year in order to expose them to different cultures, to be kind of hosty and stuff like that. >> jimmy: you did that on the show also. >> well, it was inspired by -- >> jimmy: oh, by this real-life event? where was the kid from? >> japan. >> jimmy: okay. >> they're very polite. they are so lovely and polite. you just feel like the biggest loudest ugliest slobs when you're around these lovely japanese people, you know? he was very polite, very shy. so -- we just -- the boys wouldn't talk to him and he didn't talk to them. but he stared at us a lot. i'm trying to get them doing stuff and saying, hey, come on. it was right around easter too. i had them over at the farmer's market. i said, you know it's easter. he was like no. i said easter. i said, jesus. and he's like no. he's try to do his thing.
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i'm like jesus. i was by a candy shop. chocolate crosses. jesus. like, what are you talking about? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's the best way to explain jesus is with a chocolate cross. >> i was trying this. i'm going jesus. no, he didn't get that. so like bunnies and -- >> jimmy: like when you were a kid, is is this something your parents would do? >> well, you know, this is the thing. you probably recognize this when you take your son shooting. you realize as a parent your whole job is to create memory, so that when you're gone your kids can talk about all these fun things they did. you want to be remembered for being -- that you did these things. because i remember growing up, we had the fun neighbors across the street who one day picked up four italian guys from a church potluck and said -- >> jimmy: what? >> they were students that were visiting, you know, the united states. and they said, hey, come and stay at our house for a few days. >> jimmy: these are not neighbors, these are swingers. [ laughter ]
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>> so they brought these four guys who were like 19 years old. we were like 14. we had a lot of girls in the neighborhood. their names were marco, marco, marco and bepe. >> jimmy: what? >> yeah, yeah. they were hitting -- they were getting into my friend's bed. she said, i was in bed and one of the marcos came in and tried to get into bed with me. >> jimmy: what? >> yes, yes. my father was like -- who are those guys across the street? sally would come over and go, the marcos and bepe want to take us to dairy queen, can you come. my dad's like, you're not going. >> jimmy: really? >> yeah. i was really scared of them. i was like 14 and they were like these italian guys who were really -- >> jimmy: did they have mustaches and go around with a hammer? >> they were, you know -- and, but it was the most exciting thing that happened in our little suburb of ohio. i've obviously never forgotten it. by the way, my boy's names, marco, marco, marco and bepe.
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>> jimmy: how about that? >> so but that inspired me so that's why i wanted to do it. >> jimmy: i think the lesson is, if you're going to take exchange students in, go with the japanese. >> they're very sweet and polite. >> jimmy: they won't get in your 14-year-old daughter's bedroom. well, it's great to see you. i'm glad the show is doing so great. i know you have an online web series. [ cheers and applause ] with your husband. >> yeah. aside from the middle of the other project is called "ver saillies" coming on my damn channel in like probably february. >> jimmy: people are laughing but that's a real -- that's a website, mydamnchannel. >> my husband is producing and starring in and i have a cameo role in it that's really great. you'll be hearing -- but if you go to mydamnchannel in like a month or so. or you can follow me at patri a patriciaheaton on twitter or facebook. >> jimmy: you're starting your
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very own cult. patricia heaton, everybody. we'll be right back with brad womack. [ guy #1 ] ooh! i don't know about this. bro, you can't chicken out now. yeah. can't do it. uh! it's really high. look at that boat down there. those guys have a ton of bud light. here we go! oh! whoa! check it out. sweet! oh, aluminum bottles, anyone? mmm. deviled eggs, they're a little salty. bikini! [ laughs ] [ male announcer ] it's the sure sign of a good time. the just right taste of bud light. here we go. she wants it back. here we go. we always make time for just us cousins. like the other night at olive garden. this is like being back at the kids' table. try our two new scaloppini dishes. pan-seared chicken or sauteed pork. both served with asiago filled tortelloni. at olive garden. ♪ talking about nutrition
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>> jimmy: welcome back. earlier tonight, our next guest began the process of rewooing 30 beautiful women. he is a veteran of this process and, if necessary, he will crush their hearts again. please welcome the first-ever two-time "bachelor," brad womack. ♪ is for people who did not see what happened, tell everybody what happened. >> okay. so i have to explain it again i guess. >> jimmy: just quickly. >> all right, very quickly, i went on the show with true intentions, i promise, but i walked away a single man. so i left two women standing at the podium. wasn't the best decision of my life. >> jimmy: i disagree with you completely. >> thank you, thank you very much. >> jimmy: i can't believe you're apologizing for this.
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because here's the thing. >> okay. >> jimmy: you did the right thing. you didn't want to marry either one of those women. >> right. >> jimmy: so you told them instead of pretending you did and going on with it and picking whichever one you like better. >> right. >> jimmy: why are you apologizing for this? >> i heard you. you know what, thank you so much. thank you very much. >> jimmy: you did the only reasonable thing anyone has ever done on that show. >> i greatly -- my god, i needed to hear that. >> jimmy: you had to apologize for two hours tonight for it. >> you have no idea. i think i apologized more for not being more open to the experience. you know, in behihindsight i realized i wasn't. would i have made a different decision? probably not. but this time i was so much more open and it worked out. i'm a happy guy. >> jimmy: you're saying now you have picked someone or maybe two girls to make up for last time. >> no, no, zero to two. >> jimmy: that evens it out. >> no, no. but i have picked one woman.
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i feel lake a very lucky man. i'm a happy guy. i'm a very happy guy right now. >> jimmy: this woman was a contestant on the show? [ cheers and applause ] >> good question. it's so sad you have to ask that. yes, she was on the show. >> jimmy: i hope you picked the vampire because -- >> oh, madison. can i say something about madison? >> jimmy: yeah, sure. >> okay, truly unique woman. it just threw me off a little bit. i wanted to get to the bottom of madison. believe it or not, i really do take that show very seriously. whether people buy it or not. >> jimmy: i think you do take it seriously because you didn't enter into a frivious relationship. >> thank you very much. >> jimmy: you're welcome. >> once we got to the bottom of her fangs -- that's just who she is. she's unique. that's her deal. i know. i was laughing too. what did i get into, man? come on. >> jimmy: can you imagine bringing the girl with the fangs back home to the womack family?
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>> my brothers wouldn't have minded. my grandmother, she wouldn't have it. >> jimmy: she's onliy fangs? >> anti-vampire, yes, sir. >> jimmy: she's on what -- team edward, the other one? oh, sorry, i don't know "t "twilight." >> i don't know. i don't know jacob either. >> jimmy: she made the cut tonight. >> yes. >> jimmy: she did. it's hard for you because you got to remember where you are in the show. the gal that you picked, is she watching the show now? >> okay. yes, sir. >> jimmy: she is? good times. >> if i had a way to block abc network from her television, i would do that. >> jimmy: sign her up for a pottery class on monday nights or something. >> i would do anything it takes. but she's not having it. she already told me, hey, look, i'm watching the show. >> jimmy: aren't there ways you could accidentally squirt lemon juice in her eye before the show? >> that's a good idea.
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i'm only allowed to see her very limited amount of times. >> jimmy: really? >> yeah. it's a strange little scenario. >> jimmy: wow, conjugal visit type of thing? because they don't want people finding out you're together? >> exactly. >> jimmy: can't you just go hide somewhere? >> we do. we're pretty good at hiding. i'm very happy every time i'm with her. >> jimmy: how many of the women this season to whom did you make love? how many? [ applause ] >> oh, man. >> jimmy: because i want to know how uncomfortable this watch thing is going to be for you. >> you just made it real uncomfortable. >> jimmy: you might as well tell her now because -- >> no, i'm an honest guy. >> jimmy: you told her everything that happened already? >> oh, yeah. of course. >> jimmy: okay, good, yeah. >> if i'm in a relationship, of course, i'm 100% honest. you see how i'm trying to divert answering that question? no, no, no, no, actually,
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zero -- being honest. >> jimmy: you're saying yes? >> zero. >> jimmy: not even the one you're with? >> on the show, zero. [ applause ] that's a great answer. on the show. on the show. >> jimmy: are you dating someone from another show on abc? are you with, like, super nanny or something? >> oh, god. you know, believe it or not, there are some very, very good people out there. the women on the show in particular i was so fortunate, i was blessed. some good people. >> jimmy: some good looking -- i think this is -- lucky guy. >> jimmy: best looking crop of contestant. maybe they felt we better up the ante for brad. he's picky. >> you're tough on me. >> jimmy: i'm glad things worked out for you. i think you need to stop apologizing to people. you were honest. that's all you did. >> okay. i really appreciate it. >> jimmy: you didn't go on like some sort of sex spree, did you? unless maybe you did? >> no, no, no. in fact, after the show, i laid very low.
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>> jimmy: what? >> maybe four dates. okay, here we go, here we go. >> jimmy: perhaps we should end it right now while you still have a relationship. brad womack, everybody, the bachelor, monday nights on abc. be right back with josh groban. [ man ] on your mark... [ whistle blows ] [ squishing ] [ male announcer ] pool filled with caramel. not as good as chocolate filled with caramel. introducing milky way simply caramel.
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>> jimmy: and now, here with the song, "vocé existe em mim" from his new album "illuminations," singing in portuguese, josh groban.
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♪ ♪ ♪ vim amar você até o final da chuva que navega nosso corpo tropical ♪ ♪ espero amar você até durar
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a lua que esclarece esse sol sem descansar jamais ♪ ♪ amar o quanto precisar que ame e então recuse a escuridao te amo ♪ ♪ pra que chorar chorar é fim você existe em mim ♪ ♪ vim servir amor e aterrissar os anjos dos meus versos pra você não me deixar de amar ♪
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♪ será que em deus os versos nascem assim como em toda primavera nascem flores pra mimar jardim ♪ ♪ amar o quanto precisar que ame e então recuse a escuridao te amo ♪ pra que chorar chorar é fim você existe em mim ♪ ♪ a areia lambe o sal já passou o temporal e a solução
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só você e eu ♪ ♪ a alma bebe o mar que vazou do coração e você me faz me fazer feliz ♪ ♪ amar o quanto precisar que ame e então recuse a escuridao te amo ♪ ♪ pra que chorar chorar é fim você existe em mim ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ]
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