tv Late Night With Jimmy Fallon NBC November 30, 2013 12:35am-1:36am PST
that you had in mind but you could learn to love me given time ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: thank you, guys! sting, nice job! thank you. good job. i want to thank you my guests, anthony hopkins and of course sting. tomorrow night liam hemsworth will be here. but jimmy fallon happening right now. jimmy! ♪
>> jimmy: oh, that feels good! that is what i'm talking about right there! a great, great new york city crowd. welcome to "late night," everybody. thank you so much for being here. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon." oh, my gosh. [ cheers ] that's a great feeling. thank you. welcome. welcome, everybody. hey, guys, just a reminder that this weekend is the end of daylight savings time. so to put it another way, your microwave is about to have the right time on it again. [ cheers ] everybody who waited it out -- everybody have a good halloween? [ cheers ] it seemed like everybody got into the spirit this year, even the white house. i read that last night the obamas gave out dried fruit to more than 5,000 trick-or-treaters. [ laughter ] in a related story, today workers outside the white house had to sweep up a bunch of dried fruit. [ laughter and applause ]
this isn't good. i just saw that kim kardashian and kanye west are now suing the co-founder of youtube for leaking the video of kanye's proposal last week. of course, kim was like, "eh, not the worst video i've had leaked on the internet." [ laughter and applause ] i mean, i don't really get that. i mean, if you don't want the video of your proposal to end up online, maybe you shouldn't let the co-founder of youtube come watch your proposal. just saying. a little advice. [ cheers and applause ] maybe i'm wrong. what? it's what he does. it's what he does. this is kind of a big deal, actually. they're saying that washington, d.c. will soon consider a bill to legalize small amounts of marijuana. [ cheers and applause ] marijuana. >> steve: marijuana. >> jimmy: mary jane. >> steve: m.j.? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: and if you want to know what d.c. would look like
with legalized weed, take a look at this. ♪ [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: here's some good news. a new study found that more americans recently started making healthier food choices. then it was halloween, then it was thanksgiving, then it was christmas, and then americans were back to square one. that's the way it happens. but we tried. we tried. the same study also found that fruit has become the second most popular food in the u.s. the first most popular food in the u.s.? not fruit. anything. of course -- anything but fruit. yeah, yeah, yeah. i'll take it. >> steve: it's not fruit. >> jimmy: not fruit.
yeah. can i eat that? no, that's a shirt. all right. of course, another big story this week has been the nsa spying scandal. now, a lot of americans are starting to think more about their own personal security. so we hit the streets to ask people their thoughts on the nsa. but -- this is true -- the only catch was, they had to talk in the highest pitched voice they could possibly do. it's all real. check it out. >> what do you think of the nsa monitoring phone calls and e-mails? >> i don't really care. i don't have anything to hide. so, if they want to listen to my calls they can. >> i think the government has no place in people's private lives. >> for many years there have been no expectation of privacy in this country. >> i think it sucks. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: dude, for real. that's how great new york city is. they were like, can you guys do it in a high voice? and no one said no. it's like, sure, what? i love this city so much. yeah, that sounds normal to me. i don't care. did you guys hear about this?
there's a new beer that this brewery in scotland came up with. they say it's the world's strongest beer. it's 67% alcohol. [ audience oohs ] yep, apparently, it's part of the brewery's plan to make scottish people even harder to understand. [ impersonating a thick scottish accent ] >> steve: donkey! >> jimmy: donkey! donkey! hey, if you're like me, you're a big fan of "how i met your mother." you love that show? [ cheers and applause ] me too. now, there are reports that a spinoff of "how i met your mother" is in the works. it's called "how i met your father." yeah, i think i've already seen that show. it's called "maury." [ laughter ] you are not the father. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] hey, guys, it's week nine of the nfl season.
and this sunday we've got the indianapolis colts and the houston texans here on nbc. should be a good match-up. [ cheers and applause ] loving football. now every year at the end of the season, they give out awards like most valuable player. but they also give out awards during the season, sort of like ones in high school yearbooks. like most likely to succeed, class clown, stuff like that. so with that in mind, it's time for "late night superlatives." here we go. ♪ late night superlatives ♪ >> jimmy: our first player is jeff linkenbach. he's a strong offensive tackle for the indianapolis colts. he was voted most likely to have just read a wikipedia article on how to smile. [ laughter ] >> steve: purse lips, show teeth. don't cry. >> jimmy: am i doing it now? no. next is colts right tackle, gosder cherilus.
he was voted most likely to have a word jumble as a name. gosder cher -- next up is houston texan safety shiloh keo he was voted oldest gosselin kid. they're cute. they're cute kids. the one with the glasses -- the one with the glasses is really cute. >> steve: they grow up so fast. they grow up so fast. >> jimmy: it's the one with the glasses. >> steve: he's wearing ed hardy. >> jimmy: next from the colts, we have griff whalen. he was voted most likely to do jazz hands after scoring a touchdown. ♪ [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: and five, six, seven, eight. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: terrell mcclain, he was voted the most likely to be saying "damn." [ laughter and applause ] ♪
next is randy bullock from the texans. he was voted most likely to play football in khakis. that's right. [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: got my new dockers. these are pleated. >> jimmy: next up from the texans is danieal manning. he was voted most likely to stick out at the manning family reunion. [ laughter and applause ] this is eli, and that is peyton. and that's danny over there. let's just eat dinner. everyone just eat dinner. didn't we go to jamaica that one summer? shut up! shut up! eat your food! he's your brother! he's your brother! [ laughter ] >> steve: you shut your mouth. >> jimmy: you shut up! i'm just saying -- just -- lost my appetite. also from the texans is brooks reed. he was voted most likely to call your sister a "prime piece." [ audience oohs ] rude. >> steve: rude. >> jimmy: rude.
from the colts, matt overton was voted most likely to be the love child of vince vaughn, johnny knoxville and the guy from "flipping out." next from the texans, wade smith was voted most likely to say "i know" if you tell him there is a crumb on his face. i know. it's been there for two days. and finally, from the colts, we have montori hughes. he was voted least likely to care that the jonas brothers broke up. [ laughter and applause ] there you go. that is our nfl superlatives. we have a great show tonight! give it up for the roots! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we have a fun show tonight. he is a giant, giant movie star. oh, man. he's the most -- he's like one of the manliest dudes ever, too. >> steve: in the world. >> jimmy: cool and tough. i looked at him and he was like -- [ laughter ]
he's got a giant new movie out. it's going to be the number one movie this weekend. it's great. it's a good sci-fi movie. "ender's game" is in theaters today. harrison ford! [ cheers and applause ] harrison ford is here! cool dude, man. plus, we love this girl. she's the host of "top chef." padma lakshmi is stopping by! padma! [ cheers and applause ] and we've got good music from big sean featuring kid cudi tonight! what a show! a lot of show! guys, today's friday, and that's usually when i catch up with some personal stuff. i check my inbox, return some e-mails and, of course, i send out thank you notes. [ cheers and applause ] and i was running a bit behind today. so, i thought, if you wouldn't mind, i'd like to write out my weekly thank you notes right now. is that cool? please? [ cheers and applause ] thank you. you guys are my best friends. hey, roots?
can i get some thank you note writing music, please? ♪ >> steve: that was very agreeable. [ laughter ] that's bobble head james. that's not real james. >> jimmy: you can get him at the nbc gift store, if you want. yeah. you can go to the nbc gift store. they're staying open late tonight. yeah, get the james bobble head. yeah, he's cool. ♪ thank you, "last vegas" -- starring michael douglas, robert de niro, morgan freeman, and kevin kilne -- for being like the love child of "the hangover" and a flomax ad. [ laughter ] ♪ thank you, the new york city marathon, for letting marathon runners do the one thing they love most, tell people they ran a marathon. [ laughter ] we get it. we heard you. we heard you, larry! now shut up! he's your brother! >> steve: quiet!
i have a full mouth! i didn't say nothing. shut it! >> jimmy: thank you, new study that found that people aren't naturally good at math. like i've always said, math is 50% hard work and 60% luck. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] whatever. ♪ thank you, r. kelly, for reportedly hiring an impersonator to perform in your place. aren't kelly. aren't kelly performs. who is it you thought you were seeing? [ talking over each other ] >> steve: it's aren't kelly. >> jimmy: i thought i was seeing r. kelly. >> steve: yeah, i'm going to go see ain't kelly later on. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. that's good enough. either way. ♪ thank you, asking for help in hardware stores, for being the equivalent of saying, "excuse me, i'm not really sure how to be a man." [ laughter ]
>> steve: oh, i guess so. ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, the boston red sox, for winning the world series at home for the first time in 95 years. and i think if the boston red sox from 95 years ago could see the boston red sox today, they'd say something racist. [ laughter and applause ] it wouldn't be that special. yeah. >> steve: yeah, that's not good. >> jimmy: you don't want that. you don't want that. >> steve: oh, turn the time machine off. we're good, we're good. >> jimmy: no. we're good, we're good. ♪ thank you, chocolate mousse, for being chocolate pudding that spent a semester in france and came back all fancy pants. [ laughter and applause ] there you guys have it. those are my thank you notes. we'll be back with more "late night." and remember, at "late night," when you're here, you're family! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ it's your son! mom, can you hear me?
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everywhere, every single day. so ask yourself, what's in your wallet? ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our first guest this evening has one of the most impressive and enduring careers of any movie star ever. we love him so much. his new movie is great. it's called "ender's game." it's in theaters everywhere today. please welcome to our show harrison ford! ♪
[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: harrison ford. it's great to have you here on the show! we love you! we love you! can't get enough of you. we love you. [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you. >> jimmy: before we get started. >> thank you. >> jimmy: i wanted to just compliment you on -- not on "ender's game." we'll talk about "ender's game." but you were in the movie "42," the jackie robinson movie, and you were fantastic in that movie. [ cheers and applause ] you're getting some awards buzz for that, and i think you -- it's very well -- well deserved. [ laughter ] i think it was a good movie, but i think it was more than a baseball movie.
>> i think it's more than a baseball movie, too. i don't know how many people saw it. >> jimmy: yeah. [ cheers and applause ] you've got to see it. "42," jackie robinson, brooklyn dodgers. it was great. i thought it was a great thing. i just wanted to compliment you. >> yeah, i think you know what -- i think bringing jackie robinson into white baseball probably accelerated the civil rights movement by at least a decade. >> jimmy: i was amazing. and to watch the movie, it's very moving. it's a moving movie. [ light laughter ] oh, boy. [ laughter ] when you look at me -- when you look at me -- >> yes. >> jimmy: do you see -- do you see a manly man? [ laughter ] do you see a mirror image of yourself? [ laughter ] >> no. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: hey, come on! can't you lie? [ laughter and applause ] come on! >> no, i'm obviously much better looking than you. [ laughter ]
>> jimmy: i've had some work done. i was much better looking when i was younger. >> i used to be. >> jimmy: here's what we kind of have in common. you have a ranch. don't you have a ranch in wyoming? >> i do. i do. >> jimmy: i've been to a ranch. >> you have? >> jimmy: yes. >> what did you do while you were there? did you ranch? >> jimmy: i ranched around. i became a man. >> you became a man? >> jimmy: i became a man. i went to a bar a ranch in encampment, wyoming. that's me riding a horse with my then fiancee. >> what do you mean your then fiancee? >> jimmy: she was my fiancee, now she's my wife. >> oh, congratulations. >> jimmy: yeah. thank you very much. isn't that nice? i look pretty tough there, yeah? >> yeah. >> jimmy: yeah. so then i went there and then -- >> is that a full-size horse? [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: give me that thing! yeah, it's a full-size horse! i was much bigger. i think they gave me an enlarged horse. [ laughter ]
she's definitely on a full-sized horse. >> that's you with a beard. >> jimmy: that's me with a beard. >> and a cowboy costume. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it's not a cowboy costume. it's what people wear when they go to the ranch, like me right here. that's my outfit. me and my friend john shaw there. that's a nice bolo tie that i was wearing there. i was trying to fit in with the locals. [ laughter ] >> that's what they told you cowboys wear? >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. i was thrown out of wyoming. [ laughter ] i was thrown out of wyoming. it's very, very sad. but i wanted to show you in case, you know, you ever invite me up to your ranch, i can -- >> yeah. i'd love to have you come. yes. >> jimmy: is that right? >> yeah. >> jimmy: cool. >> just ask anybody where i live. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's how i find you? okay. >> down the road. >> jimmy: anybody, all right.
harrison, i'm excited about "ender's game." i think it's going to be the number one movie. it always is. every time we have anyone on our show, that's what happens. [ laughter ] >> yeah. >> jimmy: that's how powerful we are in the biz. "ender's game," based on the popular book, and it's a giant sci-fi book, a young adult book. >> the book was written, published 28 years ago. and it predicted the internet and predicted drone warfare. and there's -- there's a bit of a mind behind this thing. do you know what it's about? >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. [ applause ] tell us what it's about. >> you want to know what it's about? >> jimmy: yes, please. >> it's about -- [ laughter ] an alien invasion of earth. >> jimmy: mm-hmm. >> by a life form that once before came to earth and reaped devastation on the planet. >> jimmy: yep. >> so now all of the nations of earth have come together --
i'm making this sound maybe not like a comedy, but it isn't. it's exciting. >> jimmy: it's well done. >> yeah. but it's not real funny. >> jimmy: some charming moments. >> there are charming moments. >> jimmy: yeah. yeah, from you. >> mostly. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, but it's great. and i want to say the graphics and stuff and everything in the movie is fantastic, as well. >> yeah, the visuals are fantastic. >> jimmy: it's just like they're floating around. >> it's a great adventure, but it's also a very emotional kind of movie. and i think the best thing is to go in family groups. >> jimmy: yeah. go get a family. if you don't have one, rent one. [ laughter ] >> large family groups. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. you should go -- we have a clip. >> bus them in. >> jimmy: i want to show a clip. here's harrison ford in "ender's game." it's in theaters today. go see it. >> doing well. top test scores in class, highest battle room ratings, but you have a habit of upsetting your commander. >> i find it hard to respect someone just because they outrank me, sir. >> puts you in a difficult position, doesn't it? >> yes, sir.
>> you don't like taking orders from bonzo? >> no, sir. >> perhaps you'd prefer to give them yourself? >> sir? >> how'd you like to lead your own army? dragon army. >> sir, i've never heard of a dragon army. >> we discontinued the name four years ago. no dragon army ever won a battle. >> so why not a new name, sir? >> because we already have the uniforms. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: there you go. that's what i'm talking about. that's a movie star. you're a great movie star. [ applause ] >> jimmy: it's a fun, fun, fun movie. "ender's game." i have to ask you about your earring, your ear. >> my ear? >> jimmy: i like your earring, yes. how long have you had your ear pierced? do you mind me asking? >> no. it's been there for 15 years. >> jimmy: it's been there. you had it done, though, right? >> yeah, yeah. i had it done. [ laughter ] >> it was a friend of mine's birthday, and we had a kind of long lunch. [ laughter ]
>> jimmy: yeah, yeah. i've had a couple of those. >> and there were two of them and they were looking at me across the table. and they both had earrings. and i thought, what the hell. what's the matter with me? >> jimmy: yeah, why can't i -- >> why don't i have an earring? >> jimmy: yeah. >> and so i walked out from lunch, and i walked down to lennox avenue. and i walked to the first place that had a little thing in the window that said, "we pierce ears." and -- and -- >> jimmy: ever since. >> and i went home, and my kid looked at me -- he was about 9-years-old. he looked and he said, "is that real?" and i said, "yeah." he said, "can i get one?" and i said, "yeah, when you're 55, you can get --" [ laughter ] >> jimmy: see, i would never -- i would be so afraid to get my ear pierced. i never had any tattoos or my ear pierced or anything. >> oh, no, no. it's -- it doesn't hurt. [ laughter ] very much.
[ laughter ] >> jimmy: weirdly enough, i can't believe i'm saying this, but we have things here. i was just wondering if you would -- >> you don't need much. just an old knitting needle and -- [ laughter ] and a bottle of tequila and i can fix it for you right away. >> jimmy: would you do it? [ cheers and applause ] >> yeah. >> jimmy: stick around, everybody. harrison ford may or may not pierce my ear after the break! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ bird chirping ] ♪ ♪ ♪ [ male announcer ] build anything with the new toyota tundra.
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>> jimmy: hey everybody! we are back with the great harrison ford. his new movie, "ender's game," is in theaters everywhere today. we'll be right back. [ laughter ] no, i'm kidding. because he's one of the coolest people in history and i want to be like him, i've asked harrison ford to pierce my ear. i've never had my ear pierced. i'm very scared about this. have you ever -- >> not going to hurt. >> jimmy: okay. >> me. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: he just said "me." all right, what am i doing? >> sit down. sit down. >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. i can't believe this. oh, my gosh. already i'm freaking out. what's the worst -- [ laughter ] that was scary already. [ laughter ] what's the worst that could happen to me? could i get an infection? >> nah. >> jimmy: no. >> you could bleed to death. >> jimmy: god. >> this is just to catch the blood in case you -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what's that for? all right, wait a second. wait.
>> there were supposed to be two of these. this is -- a topical anesthetic. there's supposed to be two of them, but -- [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: wait! why aren't there two of those? >> let me concentrate, will you? >> jimmy: oh, my god. >> let me concentrate. >> jimmy: i said straight tequila, my man. oh, my god all right, wait. wait, wait. we have a gun, and we have a needle. which one would you use? >> i'd use the gun because it's pink and it looks like it's a lot more fun. >> jimmy: yeah. [ laughter ] >> but i think you can only do the right ear with this. you want right or left? >> jimmy: i want you. [ laughter ] give me the harrison ford. >> left is right. >> jimmy: left is right, okay, gotcha. very good. okay, here we go. now, you have to put gloves on. yes, be very sanitary. i never ever thought about getting my ears pierced or anything or anything pierced. or tattoos. do you have a tattoo?
[ harrison chuckles ] [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what does that mean? i don't know what that means. i don't know what to say. >> remember, you know, "welcome to jamaica, have a nice day?" that one? >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. >> i got one of those. >> jimmy: yeah, good. good for you. gosh. oh, my goodness. this is unbelievable. my wife's going to love this. my wife is going to love this. >> you sure about that? >> jimmy: no, not at all. she's going to be so mad. she's going to be mad. >> is she watching this show on television? >> jimmy: yeah. she's watching the show. she tivoed. i'm going to call her right after the show and just tell her what's going on. do i have to do anything to numb it up? do we do an ice cube? >> no, no, no. don't worry about anything. [ laughter ] hold that a second, will you? >> jimmy: sure. >> thanks. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you don't even have
20/20 vision. this is like an awful idea. [ laughter ] oh, my gosh. >> so where do you think it ought to be? sort of dead center? you want me to just make a choice for you? >> jimmy: i don't know what's going on. [ laughter ] oh, my gosh. >> i'm going to choose a place for the -- >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. is it happening? [ laughter ] is it happening now? >> no, it's not happening. >> jimmy: ahh! >> no, you'll know when it's happening. wait, wait, wait, relax. i'm just marking the spot. >> jimmy: oww! ow! [ laughter ] ow! >> it's a pen. it's a sharpie. >> jimmy: oww! >> it's a sharpie. jimmy? >> jimmy: yeah? >> relax. >> jimmy: oh. >> what a puss. >> jimmy: shut up. don't say that. questlove! is it bad?
>> this was your first choice? >> jimmy: that's my earring? [ laughter ] >> how does it feel? >> jimmy: it hurts. >> no, it doesn't hurt yet. this is going to hurt. are you shaking or is that me? >> jimmy: it's me. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: it's all cleaned up, let's see the final thing. ready? [ cheers and applause ] ♪
>> there's a pair. you want to go for the other side? >> jimmy: no! no, no, no, no. you want to put that one on? just put that guy in that guy? we have matching earrings? >> it does go with my outfit. >> jimmy: yeah. [ laughter ] we have to do that and get a photo. harrison ford just pierced my ear, you guys. this is great. [ cheers and applause ] >> usually, my wife does this part. >> jimmy: yeah. >> is there any blood? >> jimmy: no, not like mine. why are you laughing at that? we've got to get a photo. laura, you've got to get a photo of me and harrison ford. [ cheers and applause ] harrison ford! go see "ender's game" this
weekend! padma lakshmi joins us after the break! stick around, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [phone ringing] hello? two years is too long to wait. introducing jump from t-mobile. upgrade when you want, not when you're told. get our latest samsung galaxy phones for $0 down at participating t-mobile stores now.
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back. welcome back. i'm trying -- i can't look at it because i think i'll pass out. [ light laughter ] our next guest is a best-selling author and the host of the emmy award winning "top chef." we love her so much. please welcome back to our show padma lakshmi, everybody! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: padma! >> hi. >> jimmy: padma, we love you. what do you think? is it me? >> oh, my god.
it's so you. >> jimmy: did you watch it? did you see -- >> i watched the whole thing in horror. >> jimmy: did it freak you out? it's a little gross, right? >> no. well, it's the manner in which it was done. my god. [ light laughter ] how barbaric. >> jimmy: it was. it was. it was barbaric, yeah. it was a lot of blood. and yeah, we should've censored. >> it's okay. i want to tell you, you have a new baby. so when you lean in to pick up your daughter, do not have anything dangling or sparkly. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: i think i'll probably change this earring. >> don't scare winnie yeah. >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. winnie will be scared. pal, look how good -- "fitness" magazine. >> oh, yeah. >> jimmy: look at this. come on. [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you. >> jimmy: so pretty. padma, we love you on the show. congratulations, "top chef," 150 episodes. >> that's right. and counting. [ cheers and applause ] we're very proud of the show. we love doing it. we're in new orleans. >> jimmy: new orleans. >> new orleans. >> jimmy: you know, i love the
show so much. i've been a fan forever. >> you were on the show. >> jimmy: i was a judge. i was a bad judge, though. >> no, you were good. you were just too nice. >> jimmy: i was too nice. yeah, because i don't like to judge anyone. [ light laughter ] which is why i shouldn't have been a judge. >> no, you're judging their food. i'm sorry. i'm putting my feet on the -- >> jimmy: no, be comfy. yeah, i like this. please, i have an earring. [ laughter ] there's no rules. no rules tonight! >> questlove was on our show. he's on this season. >> jimmy: oh, really? >> questlove: yes. >> jimmy: what did he do? >> he was a great guest. he did a quick fire. he did, very appropriately, a fried chicken quick fire. >> jimmy: yes, because -- what is -- a high bird is -- >> questlove: high bird. >> jimmy: amazing fried chicken. >> he was amazing on the show. we had a fried chicken quick fire and his critiques were nuanced and thoughtful. i mean -- >> questlove: well, i don't want to be the bad guy, so -- >> jimmy: i don't want to be the bad guy either. >> questlove: i ain't killing no one's dreams. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i know right? >> jimmy: but, i just like to see -- even like the show -- it's a different show now. it's great. it's the best it's ever been. >> it's a little looser.
>> jimmy: everyone's growing. you have your own line of dinnerware now. >> yes, i do. thank you. >> jimmy: which is awesome. >> it's great. >> jimmy: how cool is that? where is that, like bloomingdales? >> yes. we debuted last month at bloomingdales and, like, within 72 hours, we had over eight reorders in there in all the stores. and they're excited. >> jimmy: do you ever go in and buy your own stuff? >> no! >> jimmy: i would. i thought i might have to, though. >> jimmy: i would totally do that. >> i was terrified that i would -- >> jimmy: if i had my own line -- like, can i get the jimmy fallon slow cooker, please? [ laughter ] >> you have one too? >> jimmy: no, i wish. >> my mother -- there were several relatives. we were all prepared to disseminate across all of the bloomingdales. >> jimmy: well, your mom was always on the show. >> she was on the show. she battles it out with gayle's mom in a quick fire. >> jimmy: no way. >> it's so funny. >> jimmy: i love this photo of your mom. because your mom, as you say, is very -- she's very proud of you and proud of the show, but she's very practical. >> she's unfazed, let me say. i always tell her, "mom, this season the ratings are up 45% from last season's premiere. and it's x-million people."
and she's like, "of course, it's millions of people. it's tv, right? everybody watches tv." [ light laughter ] it doesn't really translate. but then, like, she's -- the thing that makes her happy is to see visuals of her daughter. >> jimmy: so she saw a billboard in the subway for you. >> yeah. >> jimmy: this is your mom happy. >> this is my mother at -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what is -- why? >> that's her default expression. [ laughter ] that's why i have so many jobs because she's a hard -- you know. >> jimmy: she's a hard nut to crack. we love your mom. i can't wait to see that episode. pal, thank you for coming on the show. >> my pleasure. >> jimmy: we love you so much. [ cheers and applause ] padma lakshmi! "top chef" airs wednesdays at 10:00 p.m. on bravo. big sean featuring kid cudi performs next! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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[ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ coming from a city where bullets turn bro's into souls who knew from that concrete that a rose had arose ♪ ♪ good girls stopped being good when i turned em into hoes ♪ ♪ dreams stopped being dreams when i turned em into goals ♪ ♪ big was the first one that had it then i saw nas chain man, that was ill-matic ♪ ♪ then i saw kanye's hanging from his gold necklace then ye gave me mine that show you my work ethic ♪ ♪ mom had that hooptie that she ran in the dirt used to pick me up from school right after work ♪ ♪ now she rolling up in that caddy like she coming to church ♪ ♪ she's ask why i rock all this gold 'cause i'm coming in first ♪ ♪ got the streets behind me like i was staring in the rear-view ♪ ♪ used to have to take showers standing in the mildew ♪
♪ now i'm in the penthouse look what a mill do looking in the mirror ♪ ♪ and i'm still you i'm still you ♪ ♪ got my first chain like i got my first chain i be stunting ♪ ♪ stunting like i got my first chain i be stunting ♪ ♪ stunting like i got my first chain ♪ ♪ big was the first one that had it now jacob the jeweler benefit from my habits ♪ ♪ i be stunting stunting like i got my first chain ♪ ♪ i be stunting stunting like i got my first chain ♪ ♪ on a highway to heaven look at all the tolls i paid i done gave my city drive all the roads i paved ♪ ♪ no matter what why i turn things go my way i'm rocking chains everyday so you know i slave ♪ ♪ even when i'm just walking round the crib -- to remind us of everything that we did ♪ ♪ i said i look up in the mirror chain only thing lyin' ♪ ♪ no heroes where i'm from bullets only thing flying ♪ ♪ i know the higher the goal the harder to climb ♪ ♪ but after that the bigger the muscle and smarter the mind ♪ ♪ police only work 12 hour shifts 'cause in detroit that's cheaper than the bailout bitch ♪ ♪ trap house built brick by brick paid dues on dues ♪
♪ ff good you know i'm reppin' crew on crews ♪ ♪ stack bills on bills till my backyards got pools on pools ♪ ♪ girls on girls lingerie and moulin rouge ♪ ♪ damn i think i'm gon' od off this asparagus and bread and pasta need a doctor ♪ ♪ i've been dodging shady hoes and rainy days it's like i got a built-in doppler ♪ ♪ and it's a shame a -- shame i don't remember my first lov ♪ ♪ or my first time prayin but remember my first ass and the first time she came ♪ ♪ it almost felt as good as when i got my first chain ♪ ♪ got my first chain when i got my first chain i be stunting ♪ ♪ stunting like i got my first chain i be stunting ♪ ♪ stunting like i got my first chain ♪ ♪ jay-z taught me money ain't a thing came from the streets headed to the hall of fame ♪ ♪ and i be stunting stunting like i got my first chain ♪ ♪ i be stunting stunting like i got my first chain ♪ ♪ it's such a wonderful thing to see the end of all things ♪ ♪ all of the people that hate you 'cause where you at ♪ ♪ i got my mind is on me a couple others and dreams
would've seen me and my homies up in this ♪ ♪ about two months in a week's time go from feelin hellish to godly ♪ ♪ with lemon lime shine now how the hell can i chill ♪ ♪ now people think i'm dope see this piece that i own now how sick is the rope ♪ ♪ taking life for what it is a troublesome chick who throws fists from time to time ♪ ♪ it's the weather things switch up people trip up ♪ ♪ the money come down then climb up but will it come again ♪ ♪ the girls creepin' deceivin' ♪ men are scheme schemin' saying that you love me you surely do ♪ ♪ and if you don't rappers get that sometimes ♪ ♪ so dead it shred it young boy's lost to the night i'm so ready to let it go my life is really awesome ♪ ♪ i could be really dead right now but i'm awesome ♪ ♪ some -- who's got bad thoughts don't know this god ♪ ♪ 'cause when i leave the world they all gon' wish they knew the god ♪ ♪ it'd be too late but the song will live on just know this fact you were all wrong ♪ ♪ now watch me do my silly dance not really a dance more like a prance ♪ ♪ i'm signing off with a crotch grab ♪ ♪ yeah, yeah stuntin' like i got my first chain i be stuntin ♪ ♪ stuntin like i got my first chain ♪ ♪ jay-z taught me money
ain't a thing came from the streets headed to the hall of fame ♪ ♪ and i be stuntin stuntin like i got my first chain ♪ ♪ i be stuntin stuntin like i got my first chain ♪ ♪ oohh oohh oohh oohh yo oh hey oohh right, right oohh ♪ >> thank you very much. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hey! good to see you, buddy. i know, i know, i know, i know. that was awesome. big sean and kid cudi! the roots! "hall of fame" is in stores right now! we'll be right back, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: my thanks to my buddy harrison ford, padma lakshmi, big sean, kid cudi! [ cheers and applause ] and the greatest band in late night, the roots, ladies and gentleman, right there. [ cheers and applause ] stay tuned for carson daly. thank you for watching. have a great weekend. see you soon! buh-bye, everybody! thank you! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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