tv The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon NBC December 27, 2019 11:34pm-12:38am PST
remembers when the paper was published seven days a week. before we go, a night of freezing temps. >> how about a game day forecast? >> yeah. sideways rain last time. >> the game will start with rain. showers tapering off and cool temperatures. if you're not like ja knenelle anthony going to seattle. rain at times. you watch the game here, you will get a taste of the century link field weather. clearing skies on new year's eve. dry and a little warmer. >> great. we could see fireworks in san francisco. thanks, rob. thanks for joining us. have a great night and great weekend. [ cheers and applause ♪ >> steve: from studio 6b in rockefeller center in the heart of new york city, it's "the tonight show starring jimmy fallon." tonight, join jimmy and his
guests - jon hamm keri russell musical guest gary clark jr, and featuring the legendary roots crew >> questlove: 1175 >> steve: and now, here he is, jimmy fallon [ cheers and applause ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: oh, my goodness. hello, everybody [ cheers and applause thank you. thank you very much. welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome to "the tonight show." this is it
[ cheers and applause you're here. thank you for being here we got a great show here tonight. guys, it seems like there's so much going on right now. the house began debating impeachment today. santa-con is this weekend. [ cheers ] [ light laughter ] [ applause ] the patriots are caught up in another cheating scandal [ audience ohhs and kfc is selling fried chicken scented firewood [ laughter ] there's a lot to go over so, let's just jump in and cover it at once it's time for a "news smash. [ cheers and applause ♪ >> jimmy: first up, today house democrats began debating the articles of impeachment against trump. if approved, they could vote on impeachment as early as next week both parties are getting ready for a fight just, like everyone going to santa-con up to -- [ laughter ] -- 30,000 drunk partyers are expected to dress up as santa for the annual pub crawl this weekend. [ light laughter ] so, if you're planning on going, don't drink in the streets or you'll get busted [ laughter ]
the new england patriots are being accused of filming the sidelines of a bengals game earlier this season. officials are still investigating, but bengals fans think something stinks kind of like kfc's fried chicken scented firewood [ laughter and applause now your whole house can smell, like kentucky fried chicken. just, like the white house [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause which says -- they just want to get the impeachment vote over with, which is also how new yorkers feel about santa-con. [ laughter ] let's get it over with please don't do anything inappropriate because there's cameras everywhere if you don't believe me just ask the cincinnati bengals - [ laughter ] -- who were taped by the patriots for eight full minutes. it's a bad look for the team who was fined for a similar scandal back in 2007 nobody wants another deflate gate or another watergate. [ laughter ] [ audience oohs of course, nixon resigned before he was impeached, because things were heating up, and his whole administration smelled fishy. sort of, like this whole thing with the patriots. [ laughter ] look, just admit you're wrong and pay your fines, 'cause
cheating makes everyone look bad. and you know what else makes everyone look bad? santa-con. [ laughter ] sure, it starts out fun, but before you know it, it's 4:00 a.m. and you're standing over a trash can eating kfc firewood [ laughter and applause so, in conclusion, time to choose time to booze. do what you should finger lickin' wood. [ cheers and applause ♪ come on, dude. finger lickin' wood, man come on. [ laughter ] that's a two for four special. well, earlier tonight trump and melania hosted two hanukkah parties at the white house yep, the parties were actually a little awkward, especially when trump walked by a menorah and he blew out the candles and made a wish. >> steve: oh [ laughter ] >> jimmy: trump was planning on tweeting about the party, but after the 50th attempt at spelling hanukkah, his iphone threw itself into a punch bowl [ laughter ] trump is busy. last night he and mike pence held a campaign rally in hershey, pennsylvania. hershey loved having trump and
pence, 'cause together, they look like an ad for their white chocolate peanut butter cups [ laughter and applause but, all things considered, trump's speech was a success i mean, it definitely went better than the last time he was in the state and tried to say pennsylvania >> we've ended the war on clean, beautiful, pennsyl-vanal. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: pennsly-vanal? [ laughter ] today a justice department official testified about how the fbi handled the russia investigation. and lindsey graham read texts between former fbi agents about trump. let's see how that went. >> oh, he's, trump, abysmal. god, trump is a loathsome human. he is an idiot donald trump is an enormous douche [ laughter ] >> jimmy: meanwhile every democrat was like, "i allot my time to lindsay graham just keep going. just keep going.
[ laughter ] later on the inquiry, senator john kennedy made some odd claims about how he felt while reading the report >> i haven't read the entire report i'm about 70% the way through, but i'm going to finish it after about 15% of the way through, it made me want to heave. after about 25% of the way through, i thought i dropped acid [ laughter ] >> steve: what [ laughter ] what >> jimmy: "at 40% i felt, like the peyote and the bath salts had kicked in, you know? [ laughter ] i'm sorry, what were we talking about again? where am i?" [ laughter ] >> jimmy: some 2020 news here. i read that joe biden has privately told staffers, if elected president, he would only serve one term, since he would be 82-years-old. he said, "at that point, i'll hand things over to my young vice president, bernie sanders." [ laughter ] well, "time" magazine just announced their 2019 person of the year, and they chose 16 -year-old climate activist greta thunberg [ cheers and applause
greta -- greta famously sailed across the atlantic ocean on a a boat with no kitchen, no showers and no toilets and anyone who's ever been on a carnival cruise was, like "hey, i did that where is my award? [ laughter ] some big sports news, the new york yankees just signed pitcher garrett cole to a record-breaking, 9-year, $324 million contract. [ cheers and applause he's so rich, now he can pay a a butler to come out to the mound and adjust his crotch for him. [ laughter ] "yes, would you like some gold bond, sir? [ laughter ] some tech news [ laughter ] slapped. >> steve: he snapped it. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: some tech news, apple -- [ laughter ] like, he took off his glove and like - [ laughter ] >> seth: yeah. >> jimmy: "would you like some gold bond, sir?" [ laughter ] [ slapping noise ] [ laughter and applause good game, good game [ laughter ] >> steve: wow. [ laughter ] two balls, no strikes. >> jimmy: all right, there you go [ laughter and applause >> jimmy: no, i'm sorry.
two balls, one strike. [ laughter ] one, two [ slapping noise ] >> steve: there you go >> jimmy: some tech news [ light laughter ] some tech news, apple has a new mac pro computer and i heard that if you order it with every available feature, it costs $52,000. >> steve: whoa >> jimmy: when he heard that, even garret cole was like, "oh, hell no. [ laughter ] [ slapping noise ] [ laughter ] oh, well i saw that alaska airlines is offering priority seating to passengers in ugly christmas sweaters [ light laughter ] it's nice, until you're wearing a regular sweater and the attendant is, like "oh, you can board. you can definitely board [ laughter ] you can board first. and finally, a man in idaho just set a guinness world record for juggling balloons with his head. the man called it "thrilling," while the judge holding a timer called it, "the saddest day of my life. [ laughter ] we have a great show everybody give it up for the roots [ cheers and applause ♪
♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: oh, we have got a fun show tonight jon hamm is here >> steve: come on! [ cheers and applause i love me some hamm. >> jimmy: keri russell is here >> steve: oh [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: and got some scoop on the new -- on the new "star wars" film from keri >> seth: hmm >> jimmy: yeah and we got great music from my man, gary clark jr is here tonight. [ cheers and applause i want to give a quick shout out to our friends over at warby parker so, i collaborated with them i had this silly idea for an invention called "spinnies." all right, now check these out these are sunglasses just regular normal sunglasses, but they're called "spinnies" right? you take them off and it has a a little contraption here, if you can see that it bends so you can get a good whip to it [ light laughter ] >> steve: ooh. [ applause ] >> jimmy: so, it's like a fidget spinner >> steve: come on. >> jimmy: it's, like a fidget spinner and a sunglass so, you can just get a good a good whip. you're waiting around, you know, whatever so anyways, the best thing
is 100% of every "spinnies" purchase goes to pupils project, which is a program that warby parker founded that provides free eye exams and glasses to school children in the u.s. through public and private partnership. [ cheers and applause that's amazing so, they went on sale. they went on sale last week. you can get them at warby parker stores and at warbyparker.com. they are limited edition only 4,000 were made, and we've already sold over 3,000 pairs. so, right now -- [ cheers and applause it's pretty cool we've raised close to $300,000 for the pupils project already. so, get your "spinnies" quick. they're going fast [ cheers and applause thank you very much, everybody guy, we have exactly seven shows left before we go on christmas break. that's it. so, which means it's time for that beloved "the tonight show" tradition. it's time for "12 days of christmas sweaters." [ cheers and applause ♪ 12 days of christma sweaters seven days left ♪ >> jimmy: how's it going
nice to see you. >> good, how are you >> jimmy: i'm great. that's right every show between now and christmas, we'll be giving one lucky audience member a sensational christmas sweater from the countdown to christmas calendar [ cheers and applause now, since there are seven shows left, let's open door number seven [ drum roll oh, wow. oh, my goodness. ♪ [ cheers and applause wow. [ cheers and applause [ cheers and applause six -- oh, six geese a laying. right there. [ light laughter ] let's see who is going home with tonight's sweater everyone look at your seat number if i call your number, i need you to jump up, let me know where you are. quest, can i get a drum roll, please [ drum roll who wants me to pick their number it's a good one.
[ cheers and applause 1-2-7! ♪ [ cheers and applause ♪ get over here. come on. nice to see you, buddy how are you? nice to meet you what is your name? >> justin linderman. >> jimmy: justin, where are you from >> well, i'm from memphis, tennessee but live in st. louis, missouri now. >> jimmy: hey, well, welcome i'm happy to be -- i'm happy that you're here and i like your sweater right there >> yeah. >> jimmy: it's almost like a a chris evans "knives out" type of thing [ laughter ] everybody talking about that's the new fashion, but - >> that's what i was going for >> jimmy: this is what chris evans would have worn in that movie if he had one [ light laughter ] >> yeah. >> jimmy: do you have anything like this? >> um, no. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: do you know anyone who's ever had anything like this >> not -- no [ laughter ] >> jimmy: could you -- could you try it on? >> i -- yes. [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: don't worry, buddy this is going to be great. ♪
that's a good color. it goes with everything. it goes with everything. it's really fits right in. no one would even realize that you're wearing it. [ laughter ] they just know that you're warm yeah no, they won't even see it they won't even -- oh, already it's great [ cheers and applause oh, my goodness. this is great, man oh, my god look at that isn't that amazing [ cheers and applause congratulations, buddy stick around we'll be right back with jon hamm, everybody. happy holidays [ cheers and applause ♪ get ready for the insurance-themed experience of a lifetime. it's "progressive on ice." everything you love about car insurance -- the discounts... the rate comparisons... and flo in a boat. ♪
insurance adventure awaits at "progressive on ice." tickets not available now or ever. at "progressive on ice." oreo for santa...a, you don't know how this works, do you? it's-my first day. it's the after-christmas st and the more, the merrier! find amazing deals on denim. home items. and bogo free bras! plus take an extra 20% off with your jcpenney credit card. stock up and save big! jcpenney.
(paul(sprintern) the hspeaking of magic, are ti turned my iphone 6s into the new iphone 11. (paul) it's true, trade in an iphone 6s or newer -in any condition- and you'll get the powerful new iphone 11 for just $0 a month when you switch to sprint. (sprintern) yeah, an iphone 6s for an iphone 11. or trade in your beloved iphone 7, trusty iphone 8, amazing iphone x... (paul) ...take them all to 11. (sprintern) see, i told you, magic. for people with hearing loss, visit sprintrelay.com
>> jimmy: jon hamm that is a stud that is -- that is your -- that's what we all want. that's what we want is the jon hamm come on. welcome back to the show [ cheers and applause you stud >> you guys. >> jimmy: i heard -- i heard that you were -- i heard that you are a big "star wars" fan. >> i, like most folks in our generation - >> jimmy: yeah >> am not a big "star wars" fan, i'm a huge "star wars" fan. >> jimmy: really >> yes [ cheers ] >> jimmy: a giant -- >> i was a collector of figurines. i was -- i had the poster. my -- my wall in my childhood bedroom, instead of wallpaper, my mother was very creative. she stapled "star wars" sheets to my wall [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: is that right? >> so, not only were there "star wars" pictures, it had a a little texture [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's very good tip, right there. welcome back to -- >> life hack >> jimmy: hgtv, yeah here we go, we have more coming up no, way. would you ever consider doing
a role or doing a cameo? >> the thousands of times that they've asked me to do, i've just not -- it's not worked out. >> jimmy: but would you do, like -- would you be a a stormtrooper >> i mean, is there a better person to play hamm solo than me >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. [ light laughter ] >> it writes itself, jimmy >> jimmy: hamm solo! >> it writes itself. >> jimmy: it writes itself come on, j.j >> he's dead there's a new guy. it's his brother, hamm han and hamm >> jimmy: han and hamm >> they look enough alike. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: it's not bad come on. i do want to talk about if i can -- i don't know if i'm allowed to do this, because you are in a cool sequel that i'm freaking out about you're in the "top gun" sequel >> yes, i am yes, i am. [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: is it "maverick" is that what it's called >> "top gun: maverick. >> jimmy: "maverick. this is tom cruise coming back "top gun." i heard rumors val kilmer in the house. i heard -- >> we're all basically getting on the on-ramp to the highway to the danger zone >> jimmy: wow. [ cheers and applause wow, wow >> that's where it's happening >> jimmy: you're getting on the on-ramp. so, right now.
>> we're ramping very slowly but once we're going to be -- we're going to be on the highway. and the zone will be dangerous [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: i mean that's -- honestly, that's like the "star wars" theme a little bit when i hear -- ♪ and shoving int overdrive ♪ >> forget about it everything - ♪ highway to th danger zon i'm gonna take you right into the danger zone ♪ >> jimmy: when that comes on, i'm gonna go nuts. i mean this is going to be fantastic. >> all right, well, we got one ticket sold. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: all right, good, no, yeah i want to talk about this other big movie you have here. "richard jewell. >> yes >> jimmy: directed clint eastwood >> yeah. >> jimmy: another legend >> not so bad. >> jimmy: i mean, he is a cool character. i mean, i love that guy. >> he is a one of a kind >> jimmy: he really is >> they don't make them like that anymore >> jimmy: how does he direct >> he's, like -- he's the most, like -- you think -- this is what you think when you first walk on set. he's going to look at you and he's going to stare at you until your face catches on fire and you want to run away >> jimmy: yeah, exactly right. >> and, instead, he goes, "how's it going? hey, come on over here what we thought we would do is
one of this and one of those and then maybe you do that sound good okay, whenever you're ready. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: really >> and he's the nicest guy he's the gentlest soul and -- >> jimmy: wow. that's so fun to be directed - >> and he just doesn't -- you know, he's almost 90-years-old he doesn't waste a lot of time >> jimmy: no, yeah absolutely, yeah >> i mean -- >> jimmy: but the richard jewell story, i'm trying to remember if i remember correctly >> well, a lot of people misremember it because, in fact, when we were shooting, we were shooting it in atlanta and for those who don't know, it's the story of the man who found the bomb in centennial park in 1996 at the olympics >> jimmy: yeah >> and he found it and then - >> jimmy: it was bag full of pipe bomb. >> yeah, pipe bomb and he got everybody away, and he saved a bunch of people's lives. the media narrative that then happened, because everybody was in a rush to judgment, and it was in the hometown of cnn, and all these people were trying to get the story first. >> jimmy: yeah >> was that they decided that, "oh, maybe he set the bomb." but they didn't have any proof >> jimmy: that's right >> so still to this day people think, "oh, that was the guy
that bombed the olympics." and it's like, "no, no, no that's the guy that saved a bunch of people from the guy that bombed the olympics." >> jimmy: yeah, this guy was - that's right >> the thing that happened was they ended up catching the guy that actually did it but they caught him in 2002. and then 9/11 happened and people had forgotten and moved on >> jimmy: who do you play in this - >> i play a terrible person. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: really >> yeah, i play -- well, not a a terrible -- misunderstood. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's another good way to put a spin on it. >> well meaning. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah >> well meaning. no, i play the lead fbi guy who basically ran with the profile of what he thought was the guilty party and was totally wrong. >> jimmy: ah >> so, a big part of why this guy was wrongfully accused >> jimmy: oh, it's going to be fantastic. i want to show everyone a clip here's jon hamm in "richard jewell. take a look. >> i'm going to hand you this phone. and when i do, you're going to wait till the beep, and then you're going to say into it, "there's a bomb in centennial park, you have 30 minutes. >> i'm sorry what -- why? >> might be the only way to
clear your name. >> i do want to help you all i'm -- i'm law enforcement too so - >> well, yeah, then you should know how evidentiary this is, right? >> after the beep? >> yeah, uh-huh. [ beep ] >> there is a bomb in centennial park. you have 30 minutes. >> okay, that's great. can you do it one more time? and maybe, let's do a series we'll do a couple of in a row. >> there is a bomb in centennial park. >> are you kidding me? no, no, no, no, no you don't talk to him. >> it's standard procedure >> no, hell it is. >> mr. bryant -- >> in russia - >> listen, listen -- listen, listen, your client volunteered this >> oh, maybe you can do this, maybe you can't. not doing it today >> jimmy: "richard jewell" is in theaters friday [ cheers and applause jon and i are doing something fun when we come back. stick around, everybody. [ cheers and applause ♪ ♪
hurry in for up to seventy-five percent off storewide... ...and all jeans on sale, with adults from fifteen dollars and kids from ten dollars. only at old navy! (thud) (crash) (grunting) (whistle) play it cool and escape heartburn fast with tums chewy bites cooling sensation. ♪ tum tu-tu-tum tums coolslow laptop?n. shhhh. [whispering] how about one that boots up fast? it's switching time. ♪ how's that for fast?
switch to booting up as fast as six seconds. switch to chromebook. we need a solution.ut their phones down. introducing... smartdogs. the first dogs trained to train humans. stopping drivers from: liking. selfie-ing. and whatever this is. available to the public... never. smartdogs are not the answer. but geico has a simple tip. turn on "do not disturb while driving" mode. brought to you by geico. we all care about amazing taste. that's why we've been making the best mayonnaise for over 100 years.
everybody. i'm hanging out with jon hamm. his new movie -- [ cheers and applause he's in the new movie, "richard jewell. it's in theaters december 13th now, jon, i wanted to try something fun with you i thought maybe we could act out a dramatic scene together. >> well, jimmy, i love fun >> jimmy: all right, great [ light laughter ] but first we have to fill in the blanks it's time for "mad lib theater. that's right [ cheers and applause ♪ mad lib theater >> jimmy: and to help us out, she's a great actor who stars in "star wars: the rise of skywalker. everyone please welcome keri russell [ cheers and applause ♪ >> jimmy: it's our first time seeing - >> oh. >> jimmy: i love you come on. keri russell now, keri, jon, here's how this is gonna work. >> tell him. >> jimmy: i'm gonna ask you both for some silly words, nouns, verbs, adjectives, et cetera and then after we do that, they'll be written on the cue cards. and then we're gonna act out a a dramatic mad libs scene. ready for this >> ah, so ready. >> jimmy: all right. here we go ready jon? >> jon: yes. >> jimmy: jon, you first the sound a bird makes
[ screaming [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, my god >> jon: right? >> thanks for that >> jimmy: now how you write that in the cue card yes. >> jon: we'll figure it out. >> jimmy: keri keri, a number >> 8,072 >> jimmy: 8,072. all right, 8,072 >> don't judge me. don't judge me >> jimmy: jon, fictional place >> jon: fictional place? >> jimmy: yes. >> jon: narnia >> jimmy: yeah [ cheers ] >> jimmy: silly word >> googly. [ light laughter ] >> jon: googly >> googly. >> jimmy: combination of syllables you think no one has ever said before >> jon: "ffff" with a "p." [ laughter ] [ grinding noises with a "zh." >> jimmy: all right. [ grinding noises okay >> jon: and a "k" at the end >> jimmy: and a "k" at the end all right. [ light laughter ] keri, first and last name of your weirdest teacher. >> weirdest teacher. >> jon: calling them out
>> i know. i'm just gonna say a teacher >> jimmy: okay, good >> jon: call them out. >> chuck yerger. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: no, like not chuck yeager >> yeager. >> jimmy: chuck yerger >> chuck yerger. you heard me >> jimmy: that's hilarious >> and that's what i live by >> jon: i think that's a series of syllables no one's ever used >> jimmy: chuck -- chuck yerger is an awesome name [ light laughter ] >> yeah. >> jimmy: jon, amount of time. >> jon: amount of time 14 nanoseconds [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: scariest insect you'd see at a zoo >> scariest insect >> jimmy: yeah >> ooh [ light laughter ] has to be an insect. >> jimmy: i guess so i guess scariest anything you see at the zoo >> i'd say gila monster, because i just saw one >> okay. >> jimmy: ooh. what is a gila monster >> what? >> jon: oh >> gila is a "g. >> jimmy: oh, of course. gila monster [ laughter ] verb ending in i-n-g >> jon: farting. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: adjective. >> quickly
>> jimmy: ooh. [ light laughter ] plural medical device that can save your life >> jon: plural >> jimmy: yes. >> plural? >> jon: mri's. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what kind of a mad libs -- is plural? >> i know. >> jimmy: that is great, mri's thing you wouldn't want to hear your waiter say. >> it's mariachi night [ laughter ] >> jimmy: the whole night? oh, yeah >> the whole night >> jimmy: oh, definitely real loud. another number >> jon: 12 1/2 [ laughter ] >> jimmy: chain restaurant >> chili's [ light laughter ] >> jon: smart. where it's always mariachi night. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: event that you celebrate. >> jon: event that you celebrate. santa-con. >> jimmy: oh, my god [ cheers and applause >> so intense. >> jimmy: keri -- keri, something you would hide if a guest came to your house [ light laughter ] >> dirty underwear
[ laughter ] >> jon: your own [ laughter ] >> jimmy: last thing you watched on your phone. >> jon: washed >> jimmy: watched. >> jon: watched. >> truthfully. >> jon: last thing i watched on my phone youtube. some youtube clip. >> jimmy: do you remember what it was a clip of what >> jon: no, it's - >> jimmy: did you bring your phone? >> this is gonna be intriguing >> jon: i always bring my phone. >> jimmy: do you >> jon: yeah [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: i never knew that. >> why don't you >> jimmy: i don't know most guests don't bring their phone out. >> jon: it was awkwafina's video for "my vag. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ♪ >> jimmy: all right. could have just said cats playing with a laser thing [ laughter ] that's awkwafina okay i've never - [ laughter ] awkwafina's video for -- >> jon: well, you asked. >> jimmy: i know that. you're right i did. celebrity name >> awkwafina >> jon: fair enough.
synergy. >> yes >> jimmy: okay let's go very fast verb >> okay. >> jon: verb, run. >> jimmy: last question you googled? please, this can't be -- [ laughter ] >> jon: what is "my vag? >> jimmy: yeah [ laughter ] >> jon: last question i googled? how long will it take me to get here from the airport? >> jimmy: how long will it get -- >> jon: i came right in from the airport, and it took longer than i thought >> jimmy: to get here from airport. >> yeah. >> jimmy: body part. >> belly button. >> jimmy: belly button birthday wish as a kid >> jon: to be in "star wars" when i grow up [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ♪ >> jimmy: keri, birthday wish as an adult. >> oh. to be in "star wars. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: nickname for a a motorcycle biker
>> jon: lil' steve [ laughter ] >> jimmy: lil' steve is hilarious. >> that guy's tough. >> jimmy: keri, best pickup line >> for real? >> jimmy: yeah >> wanna [ bleep ] [ laughter and applause ♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: i don't know if we can say that on tv >> can i come up with something else >> jimmy: want to just say "want to make whoopee? [ laughter ] is that better >> so i make -- should i do something else >> jimmy: no, i'll say -- let's "want to make whoopee. >> want -- >> jimmy: "wanna make whoopee? >> "wanna make whoopee?" >> jimmy: yeah, you're allowed to say that. yeah >> yeah. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, okay good. all right, we still got the
words for our scene. good luck to our cue card guys >> i know. >> jimmy: ready to perform the scene? all right. here we go let's go let's do this. >> jon: let's do this. [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen welcome aboard - [ screaming [ light laughter ] airlines flight 8,072 with nonstop service to narnia. [ light laughter ] i'm ron googly [ laughter ] >> and i'm ms. - [ grinding ] [ laughter ] >> jon: and i am mark. but you can call me chuck yerger [ laughter and applause now we do apologize for the 14 nanoseconds delay, because we are stalled because gila monsters are farting on the runway [ laughter and applause >> jimmy: but before we depart on this flight, we ask you to pay attention to this quickly safety announcement. >> jon: ensure all your mobile devices, including smart phones, tablets, and mri's are turned off and stowed.
[ light laughter ] if we see you using one, we'll kindly come up and say, "it's mariachi night." [ laughter and applause >> you're welcome. there are 12 1/2 exits on this plane. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: the half one is a hidden one [ laughter ] you got to find that one that's a good one. >> please take a moment to look around and find the nearest chili's. [ light laughter ] in the event of a santa-con, a a dirty underwear will drop down from your seat above. [ laughter and applause [ talking over each other >> jimmy: if you have a child, put it over the child first, then you >> jon: the child first. >> jimmy: and then you, yeah [ laughter ] >> jon: now, ladies and gentlemen, our in-flight entertainment today is a a youtube clip of awkwafina's video for "my vag. [ laughter and applause and also a bonus documentary about awkwafina learning how to run. >> jimmy: oh, i've seen that that's good. >> so good >> if you have any questions
like, "how long will it take to get to the airport," don't hesitate to take by raising your belly button and waving it [ light laughter ] >> jon: now, this holiday season we at - [ screaming airlines hope you get to be in "star wars." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: we also wish you get to be in "star wars. did you say that >> jon: i just said that [ laughter ] >> jimmy: did you say that >> jon: i think we said the same thing >> jimmy: i think we both the same thing [ cheers and applause >> yeah. thank you for flying with -- [ screaming airlines, and on behalf of captain lil steve and all of us - >> all: want to make whoopee [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: and, scene my thanks to jon hamm and keri russell we'll be right back with more of "the tonight show," everybody. [ cheers and applause ♪ if only there was a place nearby you could get one of these.
or these. good thing they're sold literally everywhere business is done. i'm pretty sure you could buy them at a bank. not sorry. reese's. not sorry. and i like to question your i'm yoevery move.n law. like this left turn. it's the next one. you always drive this slow? how did you make someone i love? that must be why you're always so late. i do not speed.
and that's saving me cash with drivewise. my son, he did say that you were the safe option. and that's the nicest thing you ever said to me. so get allstate. stop bossing. where good drivers save 40% for avoiding mayhem, like me. this is my son's favorite color, you should try it. [mayhem] you always drive like an old lady? [tina] you're an old lady. the holidays are here and so is t-mobile's newest, most powerful signal. and we want to keep you connected with the new iphone 11. so t-mobile is giving you an iphone 11 on us for each new line of unlimited. for yourself, your family or your small business. keep everyone connected and hurry into t-mobile today, to get up to 4 iphone 11s on us. only at t-mobile. i'us become just a littleyou part of your holiday. and we sincerely hope that jimmy dean sausage might make your holiday just a little bit brighter.
happy holiday to ya. it's time for the great winter clearance dash! by sam smith] get up to 70% off clearance apparel, shoes, and more. up to 50% off toy clearance. and up to 50% off seasonal clearance. save on thousands of items during the great winter clearance dash. only at target. (man and woman) [burst of t♪lking to animals] (vo) it feels good to give back. (attendant) thank you so much. (woman) oh, you are so welcome. (vo) you can choose the aspca to get two hundred and fifty dollars from subaru when you get a new subaru, like the all new outback. (vo 2) get 0.9% on a new outback during the subaru share the love event.
♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: our next guest is a fantastic actor who you can see in the new movie "star wars: the rise of skywalker" which is in theaters december 20th it's happening everyone, please welcome keri russell ♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: thank you for coming back >> thanks for having me. >> jimmy: thanks for coming back to the show this is so exciting. >> it's so exciting. >> jimmy: it's coming out so soon >> it's so exciting. >> jimmy: i know, right? how did you get involved with the "star wars" movies >> well, j.j. abrams, who is directing this one, who directed the first part of these trilogies, too >> jimmy: yeah >> who i know from a million years ago, literally emailed me and said, "do you want to be in 'star wars'"
and i probably, like, chucked a kid off of me. [ laughter ] emailed back, like, "yes, yes, and yes. >> jimmy: wow. [ light laughter ] this is so -- you are zorii bliss. this is you. >> that's me [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: and now you're also here you have to look right over here, is where - >> i'm a little small in that. but, you know -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you're there you're there, though >> that doesn't mean i'm not in it you know what i'm saying >> jimmy: no, no, no, not all. that means you are in it that's definitely -- but how do i know that this is you? [ laughter ] do you - >> that's a really good point. >> jimmy: do you take the helmet off ever? >> well, i can't answer that >> jimmy: oh, interesting. >> oh, if i did i probably would be, like, poison darted in the neck. >> jimmy: yeah >> instantaneously >> jimmy: you're not really allowed to say anything, right yeah >> but that is a really good point. like, it could be a really long-term joke that j.j. is playing on me. that he's like, "do you want to be in 'star wars'? >> jimmy: oh, maybe you're not even in it >> and maybe i'm not in it [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that would be a good burn now, i don't know anything
about zorii bliss. i love the name. do we know if she's good or bad? can we say any of this stuff >> well, i mean, is anyone all good or all bad? [ audience ohs ] >> jimmy: such a great answer. that is such a great answer. was there a moment that you were like, "i'm doing a 'star wars' movie" like, on set like - >> two things. number one, shooting it, there was a scene -- my character lives on a snowy planet. and we were, like, at night. and there were all these stormtroopers. and that -- i mean, walking in unison, just this huge - >> jimmy: army of stormtroopers. >> and i was like -- "oh, my god. >> jimmy: that's pretty cool, right? >> that was really cool. and then also, you know, i got to see it a few nights ago with the cast and the second that music comes on, you're just, like, in. it is so exciting. [ singing "star wars" theme >> jimmy: it's so much fun >> it's so good. it's so good >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. i'm freaking out already i'm not even in it i'm not in it. i'm freaking out [ laughter ] >> well, i might not be in it. >> jimmy: maybe i am in it
this is me i am zorii bliss [ laughter and applause that is my character wait 'til you see what i do in this movie >> it's crazy. >> jimmy: no, it's going to blow your minds. yeah, i love it. yeah, i should just tell everyone i'm zorii bliss >> i'm -- you could. >> jimmy: or a stormtrooper. >> you could >> jimmy: right? i could say, "look, it's 300 stromtroppers. i'm the 236th. >> "i'm that guy in the lead." >> jimmy: "yeah, i'm the first guy. >> yeah. >> jimmy: "yeah, watch my legs move." >> "yeah, check this out." >> jimmy: yeah "recognize this, dude? >> "recognize this [ laughter ] that was me. >> jimmy: "that was me." yeah, exactly. yeah i cannot wait for this i actually thought it would be a fun game maybe to play with you. 'cause there's so many characters, famous characters in "star wars. and i always kind of put you on the spot when you come on the show make you do something silly. >> oh, great >> jimmy: and i thought we could do a fun thing called -- >> glad i dressed up fo you. >> jimmy: -- "instant impressions. okay >> okay. >> jimmy: now, here's how this works. you have a stack of cards here on each card is the name of a "star wars" character. >> jeez. >> jimmy: you'll pick up a a card and the instant you see the name you'll do your best impression >> can't wait. >> jimmy: i'm not looking at anything i'm not cheating >> this is going to be embarrassing >> jimmy: here we go >> here we go, guys. >> jimmy: i'm ready.
right. [ cheers and applause >> do i flip it? >> jimmy: you flip it. and then do it i'm not even going to look at you. just go and do the impression. >> oh, crap. [ light laughter ] oh, brother. >> jimmy: are you doing it now [ laughter ] >> that's you in "star wars. >> jimmy: that is me that's my character, yeah. >> do or do not, there is no try. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it's an irish yoda [ laughter and applause [ ding ] ♪ i get it [ in irish accent "you never know. there is no try. do or do not, there is no try. [ light laughter ] >> no, that's my version that's my version. >> jimmy: irish yoda is fantastic. >> that's my version i love irish yoda. >> jimmy: baby yoda is one thing. irish yoda is a total another thing. >> i always saw him as irish >> jimmy: i love it. >> oh, crap. [ heavy breathing [ laughter ] >> jimmy: okay, oh, yeah, much better okay darth vader. [ ding ] at first i was like, "wait." ♪ [ cheers and applause >> you want jimmy to get medical help are you having a stroke? >> jimmy: i was like "ugh. okay, all right. all right, this is good. keri, you're fantastic at this >> oh, crap. you know what's coming
here we go, guys >> jimmy: oh, wait, yeah just do it >> um -- i can't do that. you have to do the roll in the back of your tongue. [ growling ] >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. [ cheers and applause [ dinging ♪ i got you to do it keri russell chewbacca. "star wars: the rise of skywalker" is in theaters december 20th. we'll be right back with a a performance from gary clark jr. i got you to do chewbacca. [ cheers and applause ♪ congrats, kim! you got your own car, with your own insurance. no more driving that old hand-me-down. did you trade it in? my parents handed it down to my little brother. - you ready? - yea. surprise! no. not beige betty! you guys can't do this to me, seriously!? that car is like a rite of passage. how do you expect me to drive this? just turn the key...and yea, it's just uh, automatic, dual cupholders. go with the one that's here to help life go right.
state farm. go with the one that's here to help life go right. it's the after-christmas st and the more, the merrier! find amazing deals on denim. home items. and bogo free bras! plus take an extra 20% off with your jcpenney credit card. stock up and save big! jcpenney. i'm not picking it up. you pick it up! i'm not picking it up. well somebody's gotta pick it up! i'll pick it up! they're clean! ♪ 'cuz my hiney's clean. oh yeah i'm charmin clean. ♪ ♪ that's how i know they're clean. ♪ charmin ultra strong is woven like a washcloth and just cleans better. ♪ yeah, i'm charmin clean. that's right my hiney's clean. ♪ the kid does have a point! enjoy the go with charmin. and for an extra clean finish...
try charmin flushable wipes. for powerful relief from cold and flu symptoms without a prescription, try theraflu multi-symptom. theraflu dissolves in seconds, so it's ready to work before your first sip, and absorbs quickly to target and attack 8 cold and flu symptoms fast. try theraflu. (paul(sprintern) the hspeaking of magic, are ti turned my iphone 6s into the new iphone 11. (paul) it's true, trade in an iphone 6s or newer -in any condition- and you'll get the powerful new iphone 11 for just $0 a month when you switch to sprint. (sprintern) yeah, an iphone 6s for an iphone 11. or trade in your beloved iphone 7, trusty iphone 8, amazing iphone x... (paul) ...take them all to 11. (sprintern) see, i told you, magic. for people with hearing loss, visit sprintrelay.com puts care into everything he does. we asked him to put our hydrating body wash to the test. after a long day it's really important to have a body wash that's... ...cleansing and hydrating for my skin. dove men+care body wash...
...rinses clean and rehydrates. [ "turn around, look at me" dove m♪ there is someone . ♪ walking behind you ♪ turn around ♪ look at me ♪ there is someone ♪ look at me oreo for santa...a, you don't know how this works, do you? it's-my first day. hurry in for up to seventy-five percent off storewide... ...and all jeans on sale, with adults from fifteen dollars
a former army medic, made of the we maflexibility to handle members like kate. whatever monday has in store and tackle four things at once. so when her car got hit, she didn't worry. she simply filed a claim on her usaa app and said... i got this. usaa insurance is made the way kate needs it - easy. she can even pick her payment plan so it's easy on her budget and her life. usaa. what you're made of, we're made for. usaa
♪ ♪ ♪ paranoid and pissed off now that i got the money ♪ ♪ 50 acres and a model right in the middle ♪ of trump country ♪ ♪ i told you there goes the neighborhood now mr. williams ain't so funny ♪ ♪ i see you looking out your windo can't wait to call the police on me ♪ ♪ and i know you thin i'm up to somethin i'm just eating i wa still hungry ♪ ♪ and this is min now legit ♪ ♪ i ain't even an you can't take i from me ♪ ♪ i remember when you use' to tell me ♪ ♪ run run go back where you come fro run run go bac where you come from ♪ ♪ we don't want w don't want your kind we think you's a dumb bum ♪
♪ i'm america's son this is where i come from ♪ ♪ this land is mine hey ♪ this land is mine hey this land is min this land is mine ♪ ♪ up 'til the sun comes u no i can't stop grinding ♪ ♪ and i can't let 'em break me no i can't let 'em find me ♪ ♪ you can meet my frien the governor ♪ only if you wanna try me ♪ ♪ or you can meet m other friend the judge just in case you think i'm lying ♪ ♪ and i know you thin i'm up to somethin i'm just eating i wa still hungry ♪ ♪ and this is min now legit ♪ ♪ i ain't even and yo can't take it from m i remember when yo use to tell me ♪ ♪ run run go back
[ cheers and applause ♪ >> jimmy: my thanks to jon hamm, keri russell [ cheers and applause gary clark jr, once again! [ cheers and applause and the roots right there from philadelphia, pennsylvania [ cheers and applause stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers. thank you for watching have a great night i hope to see you tomorrow bye-bye everybody. [ cheers and applause ♪
[ cheers and applause ♪ >> announcer: from 30 rockefeller plaza in new york, it's "late night with seth meyers. tonight -- john mulaney star of "reprisal," actor rodrigo santoro, featuring the 8g band with fred armisen ♪ [ cheers and applause ladies and gentlemen, seth meyers. >> seth: good evening, everybody. i'm seth meyers. this is "late night. how's everybody doing tonight? [ cheers and applause that is fantastic to hear. in that case, let's get to the news well, the day trump's been dreading is finally here they're out of those cen