tv The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon NBC July 27, 2020 11:34pm-12:36am PDT
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there is no question school will look a little different this year, but that doesn't mean kids don't need supplies. sunnyvale community services put on this backpack giveaway today. it's the first of two drive-through giveaways for low income families. the packs were filled with school supplies and a $45 gift card for new shoes. another giveaway is set for next monday. thanks so much for joining us this evening. our next newscast is "today in the bay." that of course starts at 4:30 in the morning. have a terrific night.
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♪ from rockefeller center, in the heart of new york city, it's the tonight show starring jimmy fallon tonight join jimmy and his guests mike tyson, adam devine, musical guest chronixx, and featuring the legendary roots crew, and now here's your host... jimmy fallon ♪ >> thank you very much, everybody and welcome to "the tonight show." i'm jimmy fallon today is july 27th and you know what that means >> 99 days.
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>> 99 days >> 99 days away from the presidential election. >> that's right. we are just 99 days away from election and just 100 days away from president trump declaring the results invalid. just 99 days, or as one person put so much hacking, so little time trump thinks 99 days and plenty of time to get his campaign in shape. he's like someone looking in the mirror going i still have time to get ready for swim suit season that's like an entire baseball season plus 96 days. yeah, 99 days doesn't seem like that much. then again the last 99 days have felt like 900 years.
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the clock is ticking on trump's chances to turn around he spent the morning screaming into his mypillow, which has 99 days left, it looks like joe biden is close to choosing -- i got screwed because no one laughed at that last joke. maybe if you hear it at home -- the mypillow guy is his biggest supporter is mypillow. keep it in there >> no, no. >> oh, good. >> it's not worth it well w just 99 days left t looks like joe biden is close to choosing a running mate this week and he's personally interviewing all the candidates. he said i'm going to ask you the
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same question obama asked me, do you know how to play the quiet game he's asking the hard-hitting questions like do you have organize experience organizing pills? and where do you see yourself in five years and the candidates are like, president. while discussing trump's response to the pandemic, pelosi said her new nickname for trump is mr. make matters worse. for more, i'm joined by the person who writes the clever nicknames nancy pelosi uses. how did you come up with the nickname, mr. make matters worse? >> well, first i started with trump's agenda, which is man and i thought what is trump doing that's upsetting so many people right now and that's obvious. it's the way he handles matters, right? well, he makes them worse and that's how the famous nickname was born now everyone calls trump mr. make matters worse >> i don't think anyone but pelosi is calling him that no offense but people are saying it's not the best nickname ever. >> it's not my proudest work
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i came up with a nickname for betsy devos that is devastating. my nickname for her, the secretary of miseducation of the american people. >> i think you're hitting the same wall there. nicknames are usually catchy >> i usually only have to answer to speaker pelosi. these names are very funny to an 80-year-old woman who is extremely stressed >> dwayne johnson's nickname was the rock, not the big man good at punching and acting >> i'll come clean i know these names aren't good, i get it but nancy loves them she told me the key to a good nickname is long and impossible to remember. being the nickname writer is my dream job. don't ruin this for me >> i'm sorry i didn't mean to upset you >> maybe you can tell me if you think speaker pelosi would like them >> sure. it seems like you and i would have different tastes but, sure, let's give it a shot
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>> this is for steve kilis a member of the house. more like member of the house and the house is a house of cards that is tumbling down. >> that's all one nickname >> loud and clear, jimmy but this next is a perfect burn for mike pence the vice president don't of the ununited states of ameri-don't mitch mcconnell, captain of the ss all aboard toot toot. >> look, it seems like the other ones pelosi likes kind of, so i won't say tilts it's good, but maybe she'll like that one >> now i can go back to helping the democrats fight the trump administration the best way we
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know how, with sass. >> kevin chipriano, everybody. and get this, the other day trump said he'd be throwing out the first pitch at a yankees game next month. >> president trump says he won't be throwing out the first pitch august 15th afterall he tweeted he's focusing on coronavirus meetings and the economy and can't be there that day. >> although, thanks to his hand ling of the pandemic, he might be able to throw out the last pitch tomorrow i wish trump didn't cancel -- [ laughter >> -- mostly because i wanted to see him slowly walk down the pitcher's mound. >> the dirt is very slippery, very, very slippery and i'm wearing leather shoes. everyone knows when you wear leather shoes and slippers, pitcher's mounds, it's hard to get down off the mound >> it's kind of sad trump
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cancelled throwing the ball. don jr. was like you get used to it well, trump skipping the first pitch isn't the news baseball fans are upset about today already there's trouble. >> espn reporting the miami marlins home opener tonight has been cancelled eight more players and two coaches have tested positive for coronavirus. in all 14 people in the clubhouse have tested positive >> 14 players and coaches on one team have already tested positive just days into the season but let's reopen schools that's a tough break for the marlins and major league baseball besides that, who saw this coming who knew a sport where they spit and high five would put people at risk. half the marlins tested positive
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even worse, the team is replacing those players with dr. fauci. [ symbol >> and if dr. fauci isn't available, they could try to get quest love ♪ >> not funny >> hey >> oh, check this out. i saw that bugatti is selling a car for kids and i guarantee every other parent is here and tiktok and 10,000 new jobs over the next three years and i saw this commercial on tv. >> finding the right career can be tough
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at tiktok career college, we give you the resources and training we need to build the tiktok industry. whether you're pointing at text dot screen or pointing at people pointing at text dot screen, we have you covered it's growing >> now tiktok career college, i have no idea how to rip that low, or make my grandpa lip sink a baby song. thanks tiktok career college >> they're the best in their field. i can't believe i got to study add the feet of sandy deveto >> i used to work in retail but i realized i could earn a lot more from a degree at tiktok career college now i have my dream job of doing
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one-person reenactments of "house hunters." i don't get paid and i work in retail but i do have nearly 2,000 followers. >> what are you waiting for? enroll today >> he's going to get back into the boxing ring. mike tyson is here this evening. adam divine is here. he's got a new quibi, quibi, and we have great music all the way from jamaica chronixx is on the show. hey, everyone, this past weekend we lost an absolute legend. tv host and our good friend regis philbin passed away at 88 years old. regis got his start as an nbc page here at "the tonight show" when steve allen was the host, but the big break for him was in 1967 when he became famous as the sidekick on the joey bishop
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show he could do everything. he could sing, he was funny, like really funny. and he was an entertainer. he was always game to do a bit, dress up, he would do anything for a laugh. i loved him, my grandparents loved him, my mom and dad loved him. between his early career and his time on "regis and kathie lee" and "regis and kelly," he was part of all of our lives. he would tell funny stories about his night out in manhattan the night before and tell them with such humor and class and grace. i loved that he never forgot his irish roots, and as someone who grew up in an irish family, i could relate to all of his stories. when i started to become famous on "saturday night live" and people would ask, "what's it like when people recognize you on the street?" and i would reply, "i feel like regis" - and everyone understood that. there was no need for explanation, he was the king of new york
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i was lucky enough to be on his show as a guest and he was on my show numerous times. he'll be remembered as a genuinely nice person a funny human a good husband, father and grandfather. and he always had that smile when irish eyes are smiling, they'll steal your heart away. regis, we'll miss you. so we gave the world another look. and saw a future of differences celebrated. every voice heard and advocated. where everyone can show their pride. 'cause love should never have to hide. there's a world of possibility that can't exist with you versus me. it will take work, that's indisputable. but oh man it could be beautiful. this world where we are we. (♪ ) cheez-it snap'd. how does it taste? it's so thin, crispy and cheesy.
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♪ welcome back, everybody. hey, whenever i need a pick me up, i go to my main source of spiritual strength it's time for #blessed, #inspire >> and now #blessed #inspired. >> our first inspirational quote is sing like no one is listening, dance like nobody is watching, but i can't promise i won't post this on tiktok. i'm already starting to feel better how about this morsel? you have the best view there's ever been until tom hanks plays you in a bio pick, then tom hanks is the best you.
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here's a treasure. it takes more muscles to frown than it does to smile. so, frown more and use that peloton i got you for christmas, babe here's a little blessing the journey of a thousand miles begins with the single step and the words making my way downtown oh man oh man. ♪ not a big vanessa carlton fan? here's a spot of -- a spot of clear tea. don't cry start smiling and everyone will be jealous or cry and smile at the same time it's terrifying. how about another touch of
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inspiration? true beauty is on the inside well, unless you're an old avocado, then you're just brown mush come to think of it you're not so pretty on the outside either. here's a used birkenstock that has the outline of your foot in it i used to think that both dragons and dinosaurs were real and i like them both a lot then when i got older, i realized dinosaurs were real and dragons were imaginary, so i
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liked dinosaurs more and when i got older, i started reading fantasy books, so i liked dragons more then the final season of "game of thrones" game, and i didn't like dragons anymore i thought the "jurassic "films were a fun romp. is that a word romp that happens when you stay too much it's called semantics association. the last seize often game of thrones ruined dragons for me. let's crack open this last little geode live, laugh, love. person, woman, man, camera, tv that's all the time we have for #blessed, #inspired. stick around, we'll be right
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call 1.877.only.att ♪ my first guest is a boxing legend and the creator of "legends only league." he's making his return to the ring to take on roy jones jr. on september 12th -- you can catch that on pay-per-view and triller. and on august 9th, you can check out "tyson vs. jaws: rumble on the reef" as part of discovery channel's shark week. here's mike tyson! man it has been a while since the first time i told you i saw you was at my high school in socrates. >> it was like a golden glove or
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something.castore sold you a pair of boxing shoes mike tyson got his boxing shoes from montanas. it was the coolest thing ever and now here you are, mike tyson is back. iron mike. >> yeah, i'm so happy. it's going to be so awesome. i'm so happy to be coming to the ring and facing roy jones. it's going to be awesome and i'm launching being a prototype of it, i'm launching my "legends only league. leagues from all over -- i don't care pool shark, all the ex-legends who want to play and still able to play and still beautiful, like myself, they can come with us, call me.
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like before i was saying we have metta world peace, one on one and have wayne gretsky go up against the guy one on one >> that's a great idea >> oh, man, we're going to help various charities. of course, i can still do it, of course this is what i want to do. really looking forward to it >> and did you pick roy jones >> i don't know. it's a whole bunch of guys i got from rob sapp to roy jones. i think he's the greatest fighter of my joaneration and he's the greatest of his generation and no brainer we
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should clash together. >> you've never fought together? >> >> we planned on fighting but it didn't happen and this is the opportunity now. >> i saw the training footage of you on instagram and oh, my gosh, you've got it, man unbelievable >> i don't know how come it came back i started training i'm back in shape, 228 i've been boxing i can't believe the season i don't believe in the founlt fountain of youth bu something came over me man, i'm back. >> how does it feel training from 54 compared to when you were 24? >> well, it's really painful really painful and from this experience right now, i'll never call another fighter a bum because anyone who attempts to do this is no bum. >> it's tough. what do your kids think? >> they think i should sit my old as down. but what do they know? neither one of my kids can beat
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me in a fight. so, what are they talking about? >> wait until they see what dad does >> absolutely. >> i know you're going to win because i know you you're mike tyson. how long is a round? three minutes? >> three minutes >> i think in your head, you're going to want to go five rounds. but i think once you get in there and you get tagged once, the hurricane is going to come out, the iron mike is going to come out i'm going to say fourth round. and that's being nice. >> why don't we just do a lottery and find out >> definitely. i'll fly to you. >> absolutely. it's going to be so awesome. >> iron mike, where did that come from? custom auto? >> someone started calling me
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iron mike a friend of mine, carlos santos. he said man, i'll buy a t-shirt that said iron mike and now everybody call said me iron mike >> see, i didn't know that and i just saw pictures of jaime fox, who is unbelievable i love that guy. he's so talented he's playing you in a movie called finding mike. we talked about it last time you were on the show and so now it's finally happening. >> and i'm looking forward to this it's going to be interesting observing myself >> but jaime said to me i have tons of mike's stories like, he was with you through the good times and the bad times. >> jaime might participate in the legends only league as well because i'm sure there are some comedians that want to kick hiss
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as and listen, for all athletes, anyone, ping pong players, handball players, all the legends of the pasts who are around for 45/50 years old, come with me. tell your agents to call me. get in shape i don't care who you are everybody. we have something for you. of course they're still beautiful, as myself and able to do what they do. so, why do they have to not do what they do you can still have a great football team, one on one tennis, ping pong, whatever, handball, whatever basketball, football whatever it is, we got it. >> just because you got older, doesn't mean you're not still an athlete? >> exactly how many people you know still out run jerry rice >> no. no one no one i know. >> exactly and i bet you he has more fan bases and more youtube followers
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than the guy who plays his position in the team he used to play for >> i think it's a great idea >> why does he have to die because they say he can't play no more? >> exactly i'm so excited about this. september 12th and if anyone needs anymore reason be to excited for the fight, take a look at this >> why do i want to be the baddest man in the planet? sometimes i wish i could quit having desires to go forward and be somebody because it's a lot of work. >> you got to be willing to get up every morning, 5:00, hit that rope, every day. hit that gym because there are other man is going to do anything he got to do necessary to win nobody ever went from dreaming and becoming heavyweight champion just like david and goliath, if he hits you, he can take your head off and i'm the little david who only has god on my
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side >> that's what i'm talking about. would you like to stick around because i want to talk to you about "sharks? >> let's do it >> more with mike tyson when we come back, everybody ♪ (neighbor) whatcha working on... (burke) just an app. it's called signal from farmers, and it could save you up to fifteen percent on your auto insurance. simply sign up, drive and save. ♪ we are farmers. bum-pa-dum, bum-bum-bum-bum ♪
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♪ we're back with iron mike tyson. mike, you look fantastic, buddy. >> you are too fantastic, man. can't wait for you to see me in the ring and do my thing >> i can't believe you did this thing on shark week. >> listen. my wife talked me into doing this said, hey, will smith did it and he didn't complain. why are you going to complain? and i said will smith is a different kind of guy. he's adventures. i'm not. she convinced me to go on this
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trip so, i'm in the bahamas and she accompanied me in the bahamas and man, first i was in the cage with the shark and now it's kind of claustrophobic. it wasn't fun and exciting and then i did the free dive and i was hanging out with some sharks >> no, no, no. people from brooklyn should not do that. >> hey, listen, i understand but my wife felt it was a way for me to overcome my fear and i did. she was right. >> it must have been amazing you must be happy you did it now that it's over >> i'm very satisfied that i did it and i survived. the most exciting thing is i looked up and man, it was like 50 feet up and i said how can i make it up mike tyson week i don't know
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if i'm not a water guy -- >> no. >> -- and i was happy to do it i over came so many fears, unbelievable >> tyson verses jaws a rumble in the reef since you're facing up against "jaws" and roy jones jr., i want to get your take and see if you can beat a few other legends you ready? >> i'm ready for anybody >> mike tyson verses rocky balboa >> i will kick rocky's but >> come on >> yeah, dude. >> he's an underdog, he came from nowhere >> no, dude, i would slaughter, slaughter, slaughter i win, i win, i win. >> stick with rocky movies, how about ivan drago from "rocky 4"? >> oh, man, too slow, too many muscles. >> yeah, yeah. how about this one this one could happen? mike tyson verses conor mcgregor >> wow
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look at that >> yeah. that dude's nuts >> yeah, but i'm going to kick his as anyway. [ laughter >> but he doesn't play by the rules. he's all mma and stuff >> then we don't play with boxing rules >> mike tyson verses the karate kid? >> whoa. wax off, wax on. this is pretty complicated i'm going to surrender to him on this one but then again it's me and roy jones, an eight-round exhibition and it's going to be magnificent and i'm going to look beautiful and fourth park and this is going to be awesome. let me say it one more time. this is the health sports center park this is where it's at. >> september 12th.
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best of luck, my friend. >> and listen, i love you and listen, man, try to come if not, go to pay-per-view on triller, innovation. we're kicking as, man. don't forget, eon's innovations, forgive me we're kicking as i love you guys. >> "tyson verses jaws rumble on the reef" august 12th on pay-per-view and triller we'll be right back. adam divine, everybody ♪ l these years it's the ones that got away that haunt me the most. [ squawks ] 'cause you're not like everybody else. that's why liberty mutual customizes your car insurance, so you only pay for what you need. what? oh, i said... uh, this is my floor. nooo! only pay for what you need. ♪ liberty. liberty. liberty. liberty. ♪
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to congratulate you, kind of, over zoom. congratulations on being engaged to be married. >> oh, thanks, jimmy >> did the quarantine put a stop the planning at all? >> well, neither of us are like huge planners. so, we kind of didn't start planning until the quarantine hit and we're like we should probably get on this and realized that everything is pushed like a solid year and a half so, i didn't wanted to be involved with any of the planning i wrote a post to chloe saying, look, we got engaged and in the post i wrote have fun planning the wedding. i'll see you at the cake testing
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and everyone is like that's cute i'm like, that's real. i plan on not being involved i'm just here. put on the tux i do and now there's no getting around it because she'll be like what do you think of these flowers and i can't be like i'm busy and she's like you're not buddy, you're watching season sirks of "the sopranos. which is good. >> which is great, by the way. i want to get into bad ideas has your confidence increased because of your show on quibi, "bad ideas." now that you're like a dare devil now? >> yeah. it's a weird thing definitely kind of stuff that in my normal regular life i would never do we went up the amazon and swam with piranas and things i normally wouldn't do there's definitely an element of danger in the show that, in hindsight, i was like maybe if we do a season two, i'm a little more cautious. >> i've never had a fried egg before that would be cool, right? that's a bad idea. >> it's a bad idea >> this is not going to be good
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at all if i eat two of these mcmuffins. >> i'm a wild man. kill me now. >> that's a different show >> yeah, how many fruit i can eat out of this fruit tray >> oh, man, he's nuts. no spoilers. >> this is wild, and he's dipping it in yogurt this guy's insane. >> can i show this on tv >> too much dairy. >> did you get hurt? >> yeah, so, i did one with blake anderson from "workaholics." and we did a demolition derby. that was nuts, jimmy they literally taught us how to drive stick before we did the demolition derby we did one with a double decker on two cars welded on top of each other and blake was in charge of the gas and brakes and i was in
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charge of the steering and we were doing great. were in first place and really, for whatever reason this just worked for the two of us, but you couldn't hear, so we're screaming. i'm like brake, brake and he's like gas and we took a corner too quickly. >> doesn't even rhyme with brake. >> and we flipped over and i was at the top so, came and a full on, surplap, surplap. i saw stars, i cracked a rib my neck was all messed up. and from there, they pulled us out and they're like are you good and i'm like i think so. and they're like can you do that and i'm like uh. and they're like you don't have a concussion next race. >> wow >> and that's just one of the
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episodes rebel wilson and i did an action stunt episode. >> reunited. >> and it feels so good. we talk about how we're known as comedy people but we want to be cool action heroes you know >> all comedians wanted to be james bond >> we all want to be something we're obviously not. and i'm like i'm a cool action hero and she's the same way. so, we were like we should do something we get in a ton of cool stunts. so, we're in wild western theme place. we get in a big bar fight and she shoots me and i run up the stairs and i'm looking for a way to escape and she comes outsid and shoots me from the street and i fall like four stories into some cardboard boxes and i told the stunt guys this idea and they're like cool, so when you get up there, we'll do a texas switch and you'll flip with a real stunt guy and he'll fall on boxes. i'm like, no, that's the whole point of the show is i'm going
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to fall on the boxes and they're like that's a really bad idea and i'm like exactly. >> that's the name of the show >> back to quibi now >> this is from the demolition derby episode. >> oh, cool. >> slow down when we get into the turns because this thing can tip. >> all gas, no brake >> what? >> all gas no brake. >> no. >> now we're cooking, baby >> let's make a run for the jewels >> hey, adam you good? >> i feel like i got hit in the
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head with a baseball bat we didn't die. >> we had it too >> my thanks to adam divine. check out "bad ideas" with adam divine on quibi. check out "bad ideas" with adam divine on quibi. chronixx performs for us next. check out "bad ideas" with adam when you think of a bank, you think of people in a place. but when you have the chase mobile app, your bank can be virtually any place. so, when you get a check... you can deposit it from here. and you can see your transactions
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♪ yeah yeah yeah ♪ ♪ roll out we coo as the breez wallet look like a science book ♪ ♪ swear a schoo mi ago teach rev the truck up t the mountain top ♪ ♪ and as soon as mi reach go get di skun kick the shoes off mi feet ♪ ♪ then me bless the cup 32 psalms mi rea give thanks fo di love mi receive ♪ ♪ mi work every day inna the stree and everyday end with nights like these ♪ ♪ when a holida wi touch pan di beac white t-shir and a cut off jeans ♪ ♪ and we nu need no sneakers sand grains massage mi feet ♪ ♪ blessing a flow like river girl drop aslee she steam the indica wake her an she ♪ ♪ the sun burning up til it re welcome to kingsto every day is a summer ♪ ♪ every night fee like a frida rev da bike til de swear is a hummer ♪ ♪ high grade make wi eye re still wi nah go re
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yiy fi nobody tings ♪ ♪ every night a frida oh yeah oh yea general a general an when wi touch di road ♪ ♪ mi an mi empres an mi bredda dem nuh roll wid nuh strange herbs pretty like ♪ ♪ a emerald no one poun a several in the chalice puff it up mek babylon see the vapour ♪ ♪ tell yuh dem nuh read feel di energy wi bringing every style weh dem a fall yes a we a di maker ♪ ♪ spending like a runne think a bolt whe wi come ya member everyday a ♪ ♪ summer when yuh deh a jamaic hold on nuh baby this place kinda crazy ♪ ♪ everybody a dance catch the energy babylon can' stop the music ♪ ♪ rastafari kee it groovin the whole world a pree fi touch down ♪ ♪ in the west indie the sun burnin up til it re welcome to kingston ♪ ♪ every day every night feel like a frida rev da bike til dem ♪ ♪ swear is a hummer high grade a make wi eye red still wi nah go re ya fi nobody tings ♪ ♪ every night a frida oh yeah oh yea mi work every da
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inna the street ♪ ♪ everyday end with nights like thes when a holiday we touch pan da beach ♪ ♪ a white t-shirt and a cut off jean and we nuh need no sneaker di warm sand grains ♪ ♪ a massage me feet mi locs long like jesus locs when mi steam the sativa u dancehall ♪ ♪ la la la la dancehal la la la l la la la la ♪ ♪ dancehall la la la l dancehal la la la la ♪ ♪ dancehall la la la l dancehal la la la la ♪ ♪ sun burning u til it red welcome to kingsto every day is a summer ♪ ♪ every night fee like a frida rev the bike til dem swear is a hummer ♪ ♪ high grade a make wi eye red still wi nah g red yiy fi nobody tings ♪ ♪ every night a frida oh yea oh yeah oh yea sun burning up ♪ ♪ til it re welcome to kingsto every day is a summe
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every night feel ♪ ♪ like a friday rev da bike til de swear is a humme high grade a make ♪ ♪ wi eye re still wi nah go re yiy fi nobody ting every night a friday ♪ ♪ oh yeah yea sun burning up till it red welcome to kingston everyday every night feel ♪ ♪ like a friday rev da bike til dem swea high grade a mak wi eye red ♪ ♪ sill wi nah g red yeah ♪ ♪ >> jimmy: thank you all for watching stay safe out there. wash you hands don't touch your face. we'll see you tomorrow good night, everybody. ♪ ♪
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♪ ♪ ♪ >> announcer: tonight on "late night with seth meyers." senator kamala harris. head coach of the seattle seahawks, pete carroll an all new "closer look. featuring the 8g band with fred armisen and now seth meyers. >> seth: welcome to "late night" everyone i hope you all had a good weekend, and i really hope that was the weekend. there is just no way to know let's get to the news. president trump announced yesterday he will not be able to throw out the ceremonial first pitch at a new york yankees game next month because of his,
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