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tv   The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon  NBC  September 28, 2021 11:34pm-12:37am PDT

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okay. get ready to really eat well. the michelin guide announced the 2021 winners today and some 50 bay area restaurants made the cut. ten newly starred. six restaurants got three stars. these are the heavy hitters. singlethread in healdsburg. two star restaurants. campton place. saison. both in san francisco. and what's this one, raj? adega in san jose, rasa, chez tj. a full list at nbcbayarea.com or just ask raj. he's been to all of them. i don't know. you tell me. >> good night. see you tomorrow. [ cheers and applause ♪ >> steve: from studio 6b in rockefeller center in the heart of new york city, it's "the tonight show starring jimmy fallon."
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tonight, join jimmy and his guests - jake gyllenhall, karamo musical guest, g-eazy featuring demi lovato, and the legendary roots crew >> questlove: 1524 >> steve: and now, here he is, jimmy fallon [ cheers and applause ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: thank you very much. welcome everybody. welcome. [ cheers and applause welcome to "the tonight show." you are here you made it. thank you very much. have a seat. enjoy yourself well, guys, earlier today, amazon held a big event where it announced a ton of new products
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but this is the one that everybody's talking about. it's a $999 robot named astro that roams around your house check this thing out yeah it looks like an ipad and hp printer and a roomba had a a threesome. [ laughter ] it's called astro, as in, "remember grandpa? he broke his hip when he tripped over astro." [ laughter ] amazon also said you can ask astro to do silly things like dance. which is fun until astro is like, "now you dance or i'll leak your search history." [ laughter ] here is a video of astro in action take a look. ♪ >> what? [ laughter ] >> steve: is that a beer >> jimmy: yep, for $1,000 they made a cup holder with wheels. it's amazing [ laughter ] what >> steve: what
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what is that >> jimmy: that's your reaction >> steve: yeah, what >> jimmy: what it's very simple all you have to do is go in the kitchen, get a beer and put it on the robot [ laughter ] go back on the couch, wait 30 seconds for the robot to roll over with your beer and then go -- >> both: what? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: well, get this i saw that the u.s. post office announced that its mail delivery is about to get slower and more expensive >> steve: what [ laughter ] [ rim shot ] >> jimmy: it seem like the changes have already gone in to affect 'cause they mailed out that announcement two months ago. [ laughter ] meanwhile, at&t is furious they're like, "hey slower and more expensive is our slogan." [ laughter ] yeah the post office is implementing new service standards for first class mail and periodicals that's how you know the post office is antiquated they call magazines periodicals. [ laughter ] well guys, there's a lot of drama in washington d.c. right now, because if congress doesn't pass a funding bill by midnight thursday, the government will shut down.
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you can tell biden's stressed. today, astro was bringing him shots of jameson [ laughter ] what [ light laughter ] if there's a shut down, that means tsa agents will probably have to work without pay it will be weird when the tsa agent is patting you down like, "i'm not in it for the money." [ laughter ] i saw that tomorrow congress is drafting a bill to legalize marijuana. yep. that is how bad the country needs money right now. we're like, "i guess we gotta start selling drugs. [ laughter ] did you guys hear about this there's a new tell-all book about president trump. it's a new one now it's written by his former press secretary stephanie grisham, and it's full of weird revelations. like apparently back in 2019, trump's secret trip to the hospital was so that he can get a colonoscopy. [ light laughter ] yeah colonoscopy was no big deal. they only found three polyps and rudy giuliani.
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[ laughter and applause coming right up. the book also says a white house official known as "the music man" would play trump his favorite show tunes like "memory" from "cats" to pull him from the brink of rage [ laughter ] it makes sense 'cause trump's presidency is exactly like "cats. awkward, bizarre and no one had any idea what the hell was going on [ laughter ] yep, trump listened to "cats" to cheer himself up while the rest of the staff remained "les miserables." [ laughter ] some entertainment news. according to new data released by netflix, people spent 625 million hours watching "bridgerton" in the first month it was released. [ cheers ] what's even crazier is one aunt in dayton, ohio accounted for 600 million of those hours by herself. [ laughter ] and finally, a man in the uk looked so much like ed sheerhan, he has to go around in disguise to escape fans
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here's a photo of the man on the right. [ audience oohs one thing you can do, not style your hair exactly like ed sheerhan. [ laughter ] right now, that guy's girlfriend of two years is like, "wait, you're not ed sheeran? [ laughter ] we have a great show, give it up for the roots, ladies and gentlemen. [ cheers and applause ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: what a show we have for you tonight. one of our favorites, he stars in the new movie "the guilty." jake gyllenhaal is here! [ cheers and applause a classic actor. plus, you can see him in the final season of "dear white people" on netflix he's also one of the stars of "queer eye." karamo is here [ cheers and applause and we have an in-studio
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performance tonight, unbelievable performance tonight. two of our pals. two of the greatest out there. >> steve: ever >> jimmy: g-eazy and demi lovato are here tonight [ cheers and applause we are so psyched, that is all i'm so excited i love fall tv season 'cause there's so many great new shows to check out >> questlove: what are you watching right now, man? >> jimmy: lately i've been enjoying "only murders in the building." >> questlove: ooh. ahh, that's good yeah >> jimmy: yeah i also like "reservation dogs. that's very funny, very original >> questlove: ahh, all right got to check it out. >> jimmy: then there's the show called "squid game." [ light laughter ] it's this super-violent korean show on netflix. [ laughter ] it's good, it just -- it just gets under your skin sort of a "hunger games" thing, about people forced to play deadly children's games in order to get out of debt none of them really want to be there, but they can't bring
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themselves to leave either that makes you wonder, maybe the greatest monster of all is man. [ suspenseful music anyway, quest, what are you watching [ laughter ] >> questlove: uh, let's see, the new season of "survivor. >> jimmy: i love that show you know i love jeff probst. that's my man. >> questlove: yeah, yeah oh, "wu-tang." i like "wu-tang: american saga." >> jimmy: yeah, yeah that's nice. that's good stuff. >> questlove: and of course, i too have been watching "squid game." [ light laughter ] it's like if "america ninja warrior" was a "saw" movie and i keep having nightmares about guys in pink pajamas with squares on their faces i wake up sweating then i start thinking that the nightmare is real and we'll never wake up. >> jimmy: cool [ laughter ] higgins, what about you? what you watching? >> steve: well, that marvel show "what if" is very cool. >> jimmy: oh yeah, that is nice i like it. >> and i've been watching this foreign show >> jimmy: "squid games."
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>> no. "the great british baking show." [ laughter ] the new season just started. all those cookies, cakes, tarts and tortes, even if they got a a soggy bottom, i don't mind they're beautiful. [ laughter ] meanwhile, my doctor says i need to lay off the pastries [ laughter ] and that may truly be the greatest terror of all [ cheers and applause but that squid show -- that squid show sounds fun. it's in korean you said? >> jimmy: uh, yeah, it's korean yeah >> steve: does it got subtitles? >> jimmy: yep. >> steve: then i will have to learn how to read. [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: ladies and gentlemen, it is time for "bad signs. here we go [ cheers and applause ♪
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>> jimmy: now, these are pictures of funny or weird signs that you saw and sent in to us. but these are all real signs the first one was sent in by jackie avery in holliston, massachusetts. hey, we love massachusetts she was trying to find a quiet place to eat her lunch at work >> steve: oh, okay >> jimmy: and spotted this sign here it says, "notice: this break room is currently not open because it's closed. [ laughter ] >> steve: there you go >> jimmy: could have said, "it's closed." >> steve: yeah >> jimmy: this next one was sent in by bob riggins in boise, idaho he spotted this great deal at his local gas station here "fresh cooked breakfast sandwiches, contains 10% ethanol. [ laughter ] it's not bad >> steve: that's not bad, just 10%. >> jimmy: it's only 10%. yeah >> steve: 90% good [ laughter ] >> jimmy: next is from robin rosenthal in stamford, connecticut. stamford >> steve: yeah hey, what's up >> jimmy: she was shopping for halloween decorations and spotted this i think this is funny.
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it says, "real skulls, $3.94 faux skulls are also $3.94." [ laughter ] >> steve: i want to get the real skulls. >> jimmy: no, no, you want the faux skulls. >> steve: yeah, those the faux ones >> jimmy: yeah, they're the same price >> steve: yeah >> jimmy: this one lasts you longer than the real - >> steve: yeah, 'cause the real one is deteriorating >> jimmy: reason for was for like -- this one is for like "hamlet" or something. >> steve: right. >> jimmy: if you're doing shakespeare. >> steve: yeah, this one's for like goofy kids stuff. >> jimmy: yeah, then you put like candy in this one >> steve: right. >> jimmy: look, it's selling more than the real skull >> steve: wow, it's almost all gone it's a real human skull in there. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: this next one is from jason riley in anaheim, california he spotted this while driving. it says, "hot n' juicy crawfish massage. that's not bad [ laughter ] that's the best kind of massage. >> steve: i love the crawfish massage. >> jimmy: i guarantee it >> steve: yeah, i guarantee it [ laughter ] it's hot and juicy >> jimmy: this next one is from ruby jones in phoenix. that's a good name >> steve: yeah, ruby jones >> jimmy: ruby jones, phoenix arizona. she parked her car in a parking garage and was trying to find a way out and she found -- look
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at this. "elevator. >> steve: oh, close. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, close enough >> steve: close enough >> jimmy: close enough >> steve: stairs, elevator >> jimmy: stairs, elevator, what the big difference? >> steve: want a skull [ laughter ] >> jimmy: this next one is from joe collins in biloxi, mississippi. he was out for a walk and spotted this sign here it says -- can we zoom in on the sign there "invisible fence." >> steve: oh [ laughter ] >> jimmy: looks pretty visible to me. but i'm glad the sign is there >> jimmy: next one is from beth jackson in washington, d.c. she was going to pick something up and spotted this sign here. "notice this is the backdoor the front door is around the back." [ laughter and applause >> jimmy: where do we find this sign >> steve: that had should be special made right? nobody has that sign in stock. >> jimmy: it looks like -- yeah, no one made this this is a sign that you can buy. >> steve: i need a sign that says "the front door is around the back door.
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>> jimmy: yeah no the back door is the front. >> steve: oh >> jimmy: this is the back door the front door is around the back [ laughter ] invisible fence. >> steve: yeah >> jimmy: so just be careful [ laughter ] >> steve: i can't see the fen -- oh wait, it's right there. >> jimmy: oh, there's a floating sign that says "invisible fence." what is it -- it's floating? [ laughter ] >> steve: wait, there's a fence here >> jimmy: oh, this one's awesome. this is great. i always like looking at the technology new toilet technology. >> steve: you love new toilet technology >> jimmy: that's right this is from cindy klein in naperville, illinois she was shopping for a toilet in home depot. >> steve: oh >> jimmy: and saw this sign. look at this "flushes seven billiard balls in a single flush. [ laughter ] what situation - >> steve: i don't -- >> jimmy: wait, wait, wait the boss can't find out. >> steve: swallow all the billiard balls >> jimmy: don't swallow the billiard balls flush them >> steve: i got to swallow seven of them, no toilet can handle that. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what are we gonna do with cue ball?
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can't handle the cue ball. >> steve: yeah can't get the eight ball either. >> jimmy: no >> steve: it's only seven. [ laughter ] [ rim shot ] >> jimmy: flushes seven billiard balls >> steve: yeah, seven billiard balls. >> jimmy: you got to choose which one, man >> steve: yeah --- ball, i don't know >> jimmy: that "squid game" dude >> steve: stripe, solid? whatever you want. >> jimmy: you flush them down the toilet >> steve: you better hope it's a solid. >> jimmy: yeah [ laughter and applause ♪ >> steve: oh, man, i ate a a billiard ball. i feel like an idiot >> jimmy: no >> steve: i ate seven of them. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: all right, now you should feel like an idiot. what is the first number ball that came out? >> steve: oh, let's see, oh, lottery. [ laughter ] number six >> jimmy: number two hey! >> steve: number two came out. >> jimmy: it's a lottery [ popping >> steve: seven, six 49 >> jimmy: don't touch it don't touch it
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>> steve: wait a second, 53. sorry. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it's an eight. >> steve: sorry. i apologize, it's a three. >> steve: yeah [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i know, sorry, i went too far. >> steve: awful. >> jimmy: went too far that's disgusting. >> steve: awful. awful. awful. >> jimmy: type of humor, i apologize. that is beneath me >> steve: oh, my gosh and above you. >> jimmy: and above me as well [ laughter ] last one is from rodney ames in white plains, new york he stopped at his favorite coffee shop to get some lunch and saw this in the window "open daily, closed tuesdays." there you go [ cheers and applause that's all the time we have for "bad signs." if you see a funny sign, e-mail us to at badsigns@tonightshow.com and we might put it on the show stick around we will be right back with jake gyllenhaal. yeah come on back [ cheers and applause ♪ [sfx: radio being tuned]
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♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: our first guest is an on oscar-nominated actor who stars in the new movie "the
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guilty," which is in select theaters now and on netflix this friday. please welcome jake gyllenhaal, ladies and gentlemen [ cheers and applause ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: jake gyllenhaal! jake gyllenhaal. it's good to see you, buddy. you seem kind of down. everything all right >> yeah, no, everything is okay [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: wow. oh, my goodness. >> it's kind of been a tough week >> jimmy: really >> had to cut my dog's balls off. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you, you -- you,
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yourself you -- >> i would have liked to, probably >> jimmy: because you love your dog. >> i had a professional do it. >> jimmy: you had a professional do it >> yeah, no -- >> jimmy: that's a tough thing to do. >> yeah. sorry to bring it down it's just -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no, they were having a good time. they are laughing. [ laughter ] they're actually having a good time with it >> maybe some of you empathize -- i mean, with your dogs with your dogs >> jimmy: is it a puppy? >> no, he's actually 7 years old. yeah, i know i should explain you know, he had hip problems when he was a baby, so they told me instead of giving him surgery, and have him go through pain when he was a a little puppy, that i should keep him intact. and that the muscles that the testosterone would -- the muscle around his hips, the testosterone would help build stronger it's a holistic approach, right? >> jimmy: of course. >> and i said, "okay." so, but then, as he's gotten a a little bit older, he's 7 years old now, his prostate has become a problem
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so, they suggested that i get him neutered for health reasons. and so, i said, "okay, good. that needs to happen." >> jimmy: absolutely, you've got to take care of the dog. >> yeah, so, i was about to, and then i was looking at some photographs on the internet of neutered dogs of an older age. >> jimmy: you've done this for years. >> well, yeah, my doctor had suggested that maybe he should get neuticles. [ light laughter ] do you know what those are >> jimmy: no, i could guess, maybe. >> they're prosthetic testicles. [ light laughter ] so, i said, "no. >> jimmy: of course. >> of course and then i was like, "well, what do they look like?" [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you can get in trouble for googling that stuff. >> well, what i saw was, "what happens with a dog when they don't have them. and it's just an empty sack of - >> jimmy: all right, jake, thanks [ laughter ] >> so i ended up calling my doctor the night before surgery
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and saying, "can we get these things -- these neuticles. can we get 'em stat. like they say on "e.r. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you did not say stat >> i did i called her immediately i said, "can we get them stat. and she said, "you're going to have to wait." so i waited. >> jimmy: even though you used the correct medical term >> yeah. >> jimmy: you cannot get them stat >> stat. and i had to figure out what size they were >> jimmy: no, this is insane now. no, this is insane no [ laughter ] well you let the dog choose. >> the dog has -- he is a german shepherd, he has german shepherd size testicles [ laughter ] anyway, long story short, he has neuticles. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: and are the neuticles -- what dog -- what breed did you go with for the neuticles? >> well, obviously the chihuahua's. [ laughter ] no, come on. gorilla. gorilla. >> jimmy: gorilla. [ laughter ] unbelievable well, the dog is healthy
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>> he is great he is fine he is healthy. he is happy. he has no recollection whatsoever >> jimmy: that's all we wanted to hear. [ cheers and applause >> i'm just kidding. i'm sorry. i didn't mean to bring you all down [ laughter ] yeah yeah >> jimmy: i love seeing you. i do want to say before we get in to anything, because i was with my friend maybe about a a month ago, we were just playing song for song. just going song for -- you get a song, i get a song doesn't have to be anything. and he played me this song, "sunday in the park with george." i think the name of the song was "sunday. and he played it and i was like, "love this." i go, "who is this?" and he goes, "it's jake gyllenhaal. and i was like, dude, you are phenomenal in that play. >> oh, come on >> jimmy: you've got a voice oh, my gosh. not just good, great fantastic. and i know that you can sing, and we've done bits on the show so many times. but man, oh, man, you knocked that one out of the park >> well, it's a pretty incredible show. we did it on broadway, and then we were about to go do it in london, and then the worldwide pandemic hit you know, and then we had to
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cancel >> jimmy: does it feel good that you're on -- i mean, you're on spotify? i mean - >> yeah. >> jimmy: that's cool. >> no, it is super cool. my name doesn't even fit [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it scrolls past. >> it was a whole cast, they just, like -- let's just leave his name off >> jimmy: but i saw you at the tonys by the way you got nominated for a tony look at this come on, it's jake gyllenhaal. [ cheers and applause you look great everyone was talking about you, that you had a baby pink tux that people were talking about >> baby pink >> jimmy: baby pink. people loved it. >> it was a really, nice, soft thing. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: "gq" said you won the night. >> oh. >> jimmy: look at that that's what i'm talking about. [ cheers and applause >> that's nice >> jimmy: it's nice to see broadway is back >> oh, it's so great >> jimmy: how did it feel? what was the energy like >> it's so great it's wonderful i mean, it's like -- to think of everything that we've been through, particularly broadway, and everyone who works on broadway, to come back. to feel like we actually, probably, are going to last this through and stay and to see an audience here --
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just a live audience [ cheers and applause it's the best. >> jimmy: i want get into your new movie. i want to get into "the guilty." more with jake gyllenhaal when we come back, everybody. [ cheers and applause ♪ liberty mutual customizes car insurance so you only pay for what you need. how much money can liberty mutual save you? one! two! three! four! five! 72,807! 72,808... dollars. yep... everything hurts. only pay for what you need. ♪ liberty. liberty. liberty. liberty. ♪ ♪♪ got an amazing deal on this gourmet pepper mill at marshalls. its so fancy!
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[ cheers and applause ♪ >> jimmy: jake gyllenhaal, ladies and gentlemen he's here right now. [ cheers and applause we are talking about -- i want to talk about your new movie first of all, thank you for doing our show when we were stuck at home in the pandemic. we did -- you did a really funny bit with kristen wiig and
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will ferrel, and you were fantastic in it. thank you for doing that, it meant a lot to us. >> thank you so much for having me are you kidding? >> jimmy: you made your film "the guilty" during that, right? or right after that? >> yeah, it was just right after that october, 2020. >> jimmy: how hard is it to make a film during a pandemic? >> it was, like, you know, right in that, sort of, second wave of us. everyone trying go back on lockdown, and we were shooting in los angeles. when i had -- i developed the movie as an idea that i really loved. and i sent it to antoine fuqua, who directed it. we made this movie, "southpaw," together >> jimmy: yeah >> and i sent it to him, and i said, "we can shoot this movie in 48 hours. you know it takes place, pretty much, in one place. one character you follow the whole thing. and then, when i sent it to him, really, i said, "five days five days. shoot it in five days. cause no one knew at that point -- the shorter we shoot the safer it would be. you know >> jimmy: of course. >> and we ended up shooting the movie in 11 days >> jimmy: wow. that's unbelievably short amount of time to shoot a movie.
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>> but it was safe, you know as safe as it can be so, it was difficult in certain ways i mean, like, friday before the monday we were supposed to start shooting, someone near antoine tested positive for covid. >> jimmy: sure >> and he had to go in to quarantine and we only had an 11 day shoot. so it means 12 days he had to be away. which meant because it was so short -- we had all these great actors we have ethan hawke in it. we have paul dano, peter sarsgaard, riley keough -- all these incredible actors that meant they were doing a favor. they'd have to recast. it was going fall apart. and we basically found this van with monitors in it. and we hardwired the van to the stage, and antoine directed the entire movie from a van from a a block a way from the stage where we shot. yeah and the only time -- >> jimmy: this is insane >> so we would talk on the phone in between these takes and when we were changing set ups, and we had a little bit of time they put a ladder over the wall of the stage, and i would climb up the ladder, and he would come out of his van and we would talk to each other like romeo and juliet [ light laughter ]
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>> jimmy: he brought in this photo. here's you talking to antoine fuqua. look at this [ laughter ] jake, this is crazy. >> literally, i would climb a ladder, and we would just, like, yell at each other he would be like, "good take!" >> jimmy: here is antoine. his view from -- that's you talking to him [ laughter ] this is wild >> yeah. >> jimmy: i mean, this is crazy that you guys even pulled this off. >> it was so amazing i mean, we know each other well we're really good friends. so we were able to trust each other from afar, you know. but i've never made anything where i haven't been able to do be in physical proximity -- i mean, all the actors were all over the world basically the movie is calls coming in. so, all the actors were calling in, but they were all on zoom. in australia and new york, los angeles, and it was just -- our director in a van. down the block >> jimmy: what was he like was he freaking out like, "i have never directed from a van what do i do?" >> he's a champ. he's a champ >> jimmy: yeah, he's brilliant >> you look forward to those
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kind of things at a certain point -- that pressure and that tension. i mean, it was hard that he did it, but -- >> jimmy: i mean, you would have no clue watching the movie. it's fantastic it's like this is -- i mean, edge of your seat. i'm, like, going, "what? i would have no idea that you shot this in 11 days it's a crazy thriller. you play a 9-1-1 operator. can you set it up? >> yeah, i play a 9-1-1 operator his name is joe bailer and he gets this call, and basically -- i don't want to give too much away, because literally anything that you say about the movie gives something away >> jimmy: you kind of did. >> he gets this call, and it changes his entire night and ultimately changes his entire life. and it's just a crazy ride it's just like a - >> jimmy: yeah >> crazy 90 minute ride. >> jimmy: you do such a great job with it too. are you acting with the actors when you're acting, or just -- no talking to - >> oh, yeah, no, everything's live we would do -- we broke the movie up into five parts so, it's 20 minutes. we did 20 pages a day. 20 minute takes. we do 20, 30 minutes -- we do the whole thing.
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they'd all call in, and there would actually phone calls and everything you see in the movie is live. >> jimmy: i want to show everyone a clip. here's jake gyllenhaal in "the guilty." take a look at this. >> i need the color of the car okay, when i say the right one, say, "it's fine. red, blue, black, white. >> it's fine >> white >> yes >> is it a car >> no. >> truck >> van >> no, just yes or no answers, emily. >> i'm sorry, i have to hang up >> emily >> i have to hang up >> emily, don't hang up, okay? put the phone on the floor, or in your pocket anywhere that he can't see it, all right? just keep it on so we can track you, and if you can't just call me back. my name is joe, i'll be waiting emily, do you hear me? i will be waiting. >> okay, i'm sorry >> my name is -- [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: that's what i'm talking about. jake gyllenhaal, everybody "the guilty" is in select theaters now, and on netflix friday karamo joins us after the break. stick around, love you buddy
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or mix and match data options. available now for comcast business internet customers with no line-activation fees or term contract required. see if you can save by switching today. comcast business. powering possibilities. [ cheers and applause ♪ >> jimmy: well, you know my next guest as the culture expert on "queer eye," now you can see him in the final season of "dear white people" which is streaming on netflix, please welcome karamo [ cheers and applause ♪ [ cheers and applause
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>> how are you doing, brother? >> jimmy: welcome back >> thank you for having me look at this beautiful audience the energy >> jimmy: come on. you feel that? [ cheers and applause >> yes you all look good. >> jimmy: we need it, right? we need that -- the recharge our batteries. yes. >> feels nice to be around people again >> jimmy: i saw you, by the way, you did a great job at the emmys. you are on "e!'s on the red carpet" now. >> yeah, yeah, you know what i mean, i'm trying to get in my little ryan seacrest gig right quick, you know what i mean? [ light laughter ] step in. >> jimmy: you are fantastic at it do you enjoy doing it? >> listen, it was a dream of mine i used to work in social services and i lived in texas and i was a single father for anybody who doesn't know i could not afford hosting classes. and so, i would mute my tv and when ryan seacrest, joan rivers, giuliana rancic, you know, the e! hosts were on, and i would pretend, like, using captions that i was them and to be there now -- >> jimmy: like, reading? like a teleprompter? >> i was reading a a teleprompter it was like me being at home, the kids were doing homework and i'm like, "today on e!,
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we're gonna -- like -- and now here it is i tell this story, because anybody out there who has a dream, literally, you might be in a circumstance right now where you feel like you can't make it. just believe in yourself keep practicing. keep doing what you gotta to do and you can make it. it's the truth [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: i love that. >> it's the truth. yeah >> jimmy: that's a crazy story >> yeah, it is >> jimmy: did you bring anyone with you >> i did, i brought my best friend of 25 years, his name is tre. best friend tre. and it was really hard for me to get him but we have been homies since like 18 years old, college days and i was like, "if i'm having this experience, i want him to be there." you know what i mean >> jimmy: yeah >> and i brought him and got him and i said, "you got to look like you are doing something. so i'm giving you one job, take photos of me with these celebrities, these are some of the icons of the icons." >> jimmy: yeah >> "and i need you to stay close to me. >> jimmy: get to hang out, go to the emmys >> yeah. >> jimmy: all his job was to do, just take photos of you and the celebrities. >> take photos of me and the celebrities. >> jimmy: you brought us some photos >> i did i mean, amazing photos >> jimmy: taken by tre >> by tre. >> jimmy: yeah, this is a great picture of you with angela bassett >> angela bassett, the queen
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>> jimmy: yeah >> and if you can see, tre clearly did not understand the assignment [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's you, and that's angela bassett. >> the bald head >> jimmy: yep. >> angela bassett. >> jimmy: angela bassett and there is tre >> that is tre [ laughter ] >> jimmy: this is a good shot here that is you and cedric >> cedric the entertainer. y'all know cedric. >> jimmy: ced, he's the best >> the best. >> jimmy: you and cedric the entertainer. here's just a great photo of you. [ laughter ] and the entertainer. there you go [ applause ] >> i told tre, "all your job is, is to take photos of me and the celebrities. >> jimmy: this one is my favorite one because this is a a picture of you and taraji p. henson >> he didn't even get me [ laughter and applause there's literally, i appreciate that there's literally a point at the day, jimmy, that literally he just said, "forget it, i'm just going to start taking photos of myself and the celebrities. like, he had 98 photos, no joke, because i counted on his phone, and only two were of me in it. two.
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>> jimmy: tre. >> that was it >> jimmy: he's got a sense of humor, he's funny, man >> yeah, he is, he is. >> jimmy: you have to give it to tre you brought something that i think is even a cooler thing which i appreciate you saved for our show because i was talking to you about the e! red carpet and you were hosting and you go, "yeah. i go, "when did you get started doing this?" and you got a weird opportunity, right you got in to, what? modeling >> yeah, so when i was leaving social services i started to model and try to host as well. and i got this call, and they were like, "you're working with, like, a big celebrity that's going to be, like, a big job. and i was, like, freaking out. they wouldn't tell me who it was. what it was. they were like, "you have to show up, and you know, just get hair and make up ready and you're going to work with this big celebrity," and i'm freaking out get there. they start putting make up on me and they're like, "you're a a zombie." and i was like, "seriously, a zombie?" [ laughter ] i was like, "i don't get it. what do you mean?" they're like, "don't worry, the celebrity wants you to be a zombie they want you to be a zombie." >> jimmy: like, "we need some good looking zombies." >> "we need some good looking zombies. and i was like -
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i'm looking at the girl with me, she was 5'10" and gorgeous, i'm like, "well, i guess we're gonna be cute zombies. okay, girl yeah we get there and it's literally joan rivers. the icon >> jimmy: this is you. >> no one has ever seen these photos i took selfies where i'm a a zombie with joan rivers -- [ laughter ] eating meat. >> jimmy: dude, that is insane >> this is one of my first hollywood jobs again >> jimmy: i love that you -- >> look at this, joan rivers [ laughter ] >> jimmy: and how was joan what was this for? >> i have to tell you, i had no idea what it was for, because i never saw it anywhere. >> jimmy: really >> like, literally we showed up at her house, we took photos, she gave me a couple of kisses on the mouth like, the best kiss ever, while looking like that. >> jimmy: yeah >> and i was like, "girl, are you sure you want to do this?" >> jimmy: a zombie, yeah >> yeah. and -- >> jimmy: did she talk to you or give you any advice >> she did she actually pulled me to the side and she was like, "for you to have a sense of humor to come here and do this, you have a humility about you, keep that, keep going people are going to try to break you down in this business do not let them break you down
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don't let 'no' stop you, let them propel you. i mean, she was just dropping knowledge after knowledge. >> jimmy: really >> yeah and i'm sitting there in zombie make up and i'm like, "okay, joan. >> jimmy: yeah, whatever you want >> yeah. >> jimmy: joan rivers, that's how you do it. >> you know what i mean? [ applause ] >> jimmy: i love her, man, i miss her >> i do too. >> jimmy: i do want to talk about your acting role in "dear white people." >> yeah. >> jimmy: you join the cast for the season -- the final season >> yeah. >> jimmy: how did you get the gig and did you always -- i mean, you're a good actor. i think this is -- >> mama, we made it! >> jimmy: no, no, no you will see soon, in the clip >> okay. >> jimmy: but that's great, i mean you just auditioned or -- >> no, you know what, i did audition, but it was something that in the back of my mind i wanted to do but i didn't tell anyone because sometimes people in our lives have this unconscious fear of stopping us -- >> jimmy: yeah >> from going after what we want because they are afraid to go after their own lives so i secretly studied, did what i needed to do and then, justin simien, who's the creator of "dear white
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people" was like, "if you want to audition and try it, here it goes." i auditioned just like everyone else and got the role and luckily it wasn't too far away from what i do naturally i'm playing a college counselor. so i'm still guiding people and counseling them. >> jimmy: yeah >> but, you know >> jimmy: dude, you're fantastic in it. i want to show everyone a clip here's karamo in "dear white people." take a look at this. >> harvard medical is well within your reach. >> pathobiology didn't ruin anything >> are you talking about the "a-", you kidding me right you brought the class average up to a -- a "d+." yeah, i got to get a lot more people to sign up for psych this year. >> yeah, well, i was thinking of adding something. >> joelle, you are familiar with the ancient art of sleeping >> yes, but i guess i just wish there was something on my schedule worth waking up for >> listen, you're no good to anyone else, especially yourself, if you're burned out if you have to add something, go ahead and add something that's fun we all have a lot of needs
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but joelle, being productive is just one of them >> jimmy: yeah, we need -- [ cheers and applause i need more karamo on my tv. i want karamo in the movie karamo, everybody! [ cheers and applause the final season of "dear white people" is streaming now on netflix. we'll be right back from a a performance from g-eazy featuring demi lovato. stick around [ cheers and applause ♪ life's kinda unpredictable. like when your groceries arrive the moment you remember everything you forgot. [dog barks] or when your kids says... there's a bake sale at school tomorrow. tomorrrow, tomorrow? or when you discover art-cuterie is a thing you have to try. like now. or when you could go to the store but you also need to walk the dog, pack the lunches, and uhhh... oh yeah take the kids to school. you have children! for anything today brings, fresh groceries and more. free same day delivery. walmart plus
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welcome to allstate. where you can pay a little less and enjoy the ride a little more. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ now, get new lower auto rates with allstate. because better protection costs a whole lot less. you're in good hands with allstate. click or call for a lower auto rate today. little caesars new crazy calzony. julienned pepperoni. so tasty. garlic white sauce. here comes the bite! here comes the... yummy! was i dreaming about the crazy calzony again? you also said some weird things about giraffes. we're not big pizza. we're little caesars. the new crazy calzony for $8.49. pizza! pizza!
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the new crazy calzony for $8.49. ♪ ♪ ♪ finding your new favorite spot? piece of no-you-really-have-to-try-this cake. get exclusive access to sought after restaurants. one of the many reasons you're with amex platinum. ♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: two of the best in the business performing "breakdown," featuring demi lovato, from his
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new album, "these things happen too," give it up for g-eazy! [ cheers and applause ♪ ♪ i got big plans but none of them feel like mine and i miss days ♪ ♪ where i used to feel like me 'cause i've been trapped in all the freedom ♪ ♪ throw my hear up at the ceilin i take another drink so i can kill ♪ ♪ the voice of reason i got big plan but none of them feel like mine ♪ ♪ you know uh been fightin' my demon but they ain't fightin' fair but i keep saying that ♪ ♪ everything is alright i swea all alone in a dark spac ain't no light in there ♪ ♪ what's messed up is i might actually like it there pouring everything on this paper my pen is on ♪ ♪ feel like i'm breakin' in places they pu the pressure o i'm the one in my circle ♪ ♪ they all dependin' on to do it thoug i need some stuf i've become dependent on ♪ ♪ someone tried t confront me no we don't get along in my business they ♪ ♪ trippin' on wha i'm sippin' on reach the
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pedestal that ♪ ♪ my head is on but truthfully i'v been breaking down just finally lettin' on ♪ ♪ oh i'm in the middl of a breakdown bab i need you i need yo oh i'm in the middle ♪ ♪ of a storm now baby i need you i need yo to come over tell me this'll be over ♪ ♪ over soon now oh i'm in the middle of a breakdown bab i need you i need you ♪ ♪ crowded space but i feel alone eyes on me at all time in the judgement zone ♪ ♪ somewhere on the road messed u but i'm missin' home no rest for the wicked ♪ ♪ where could i put a pillow o anywhere feel misunderstoo they try to patronize ♪ ♪ they judging my way but won't empathiz you couldn't wal in my shoes ♪ ♪ i'm not telling lie since 21 i've been running whole enterprise ♪ ♪ provide for too many peopl i can't jeopardize but i've been breaking ♪ ♪ in half t two separate lives mr. hyde just died looking in jekyll's eyes ♪ ♪ i start becomin somebody i can't recognize ♪ oh i'm in the middl
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of a breakdown bab i need you i need yo oh i'm in the middle ♪ ♪ of a storm now baby i need you i need yo to come over tell me this'll be over ♪ ♪ over soon now oh i'm in the middle of a breakdown bab i need you i need you ♪ ♪ woah, oh-woah-a oh-woah oh-woah-ah breakdow i got big plans ♪ ♪ but none of the feel like mine and i miss days wher i used to feel like me ♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: come on, now how do you do it
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come on. >> i love you. >> jimmy: how? that's what i'm talking about. g-eazy, demi lovato! there you go, that's right "these things happen too" is out now. we'll be right back, ladies and gentlemen. [ cheers and applause ♪
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♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: my thanks to jake gyllenhaal, karamo, g-eazy, demi lovato, once again.
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[ cheers and applause and the roots right there from philadelphia, pennsylvania [ cheers and applause thank you for watching stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers. good night, everybody. thank you. ♪
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♪ >> announcer: tonight on "late night with seth meyers," ray liotta "what we do in the shadows," actress natasia demetriou, author spencer ackerman, featuring the 8g band with nick baglio, and now seth meyers. >> seth: good evening, i'm seth meyers and this is "late night. we hope you're doing well. and let's get to the news. president biden received his coronavirus vaccine booster shot yesterday, or as fox news reported, heroin [ laughter ] while receiving his coronavirus

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