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tv   Jimmy Kimmel Live  ABC  March 10, 2016 11:35pm-12:38am EST

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and now, abc's "jimmy kimmel live." >> dicky: from hollywood it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight, viola davis, from "the brothers grimsby," isla fisher, "this week in unnecessary censorship" -- and music from the suffers with cleto and the cletones. and now, if i'm not mistaken, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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>> jimmy: hi, i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for coming. i want to let you know, every night i take a look at the audience and i decide, we've got a bunch of lunatics in this group. and you're happy about it, i guess, huh? hey, december wguess who turned old? barbie the doll is 57. she looks great, holding up well. the original barbie was created in 1959. the first african-american barbie came out in 1968. in 1984 barbie got married to larry king. [ laughter ] and the rest is history. since 1959, more than 800 million barbie dolls have been sold. some have been subjected to the
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imaginable. armed broken off. children chewing on their feet. horrible things. over the years barbie has evolved. now we have a full-figured barbie, short barbie, tall barbie. a new barbie who finally acts her age. >> you love barbie for 57 years. and this year for her birthday, mattel is introducing a brand-new barber. barb! >> she looks like my aunt nancy. >> barbie's 57 and her bone density is low, feed her a calcium chew. >> i miss regular barbie. >> oh, honey, i haven't been regular in years! >> i don't get it. >> barb struggles with constipation. >> oh. >> barb's husband of 36 years, kenneth. >> get away from me, go run around with your little whore skipper. >> there's nothing going on with
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penis. >> barb! now with real estate license and matching bench. caution, hot flashes. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: happy birthday, barb. speaking of great strides for women, hillary clinton last night continued on her mission to become the first female president of the united states. she debated bernie sanders last night in miami. they talked about a number of subjects including immigration reform, health care, wall street bailouts. what got most people's attention, weirdly, was this. it was the color of bernie sanders' suit. now online people said it looked brown. some people said it looked blue. a few lunatics said eggplant. even his spokesperson at first said it was blue, then corrected himself, saying it was black. clearly, i don't know if we can look at it again, clearly the suit is brown. i mean, that suit is so brown, donald trump wants to have it deported. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ]
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the suit has resulted in a big argument on twitter. there's a debate about the debate. it was like election "inception" or something. here's the thing, i wish we could stop. as a country we could stop focusing on things like the color of bernie sanders' suit and start focusing on the fact that he was able to successfully dress himself. [ cheers and applause ] this is my favorite moment from the debate last night. a woman asked a question in spanish. [ speaking spanish ] >> the guy holding the mike is the translator. you may guess bernie sanders doesn't speak spanish. so he had to translate what bernie sanders was saying back to the woman. listen here. >> some people say he looks brown. but then all these other people are twitter are say
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blue or even black. anyway. want to have sex after this? >> jimmy: sometimes you find love where you least expect it, it's true. the. s tonight had their own debate in miami. there have been more republican debates than seasons of "dancing with the stars." the chairman of the republican national committee said he was hoping for a g-rated night tonight. i love that we've reached the point where the party has to remind a candidate not to discuss the size of his penis on television during the debate. [ cheers and applause ] the florida primary happens on tuesday. and they say it all comes down to florida. which i cannot think of a scarier sentence than "it all comes down to florida." of all the states, not the one you want it to all come down to. florida is jeb bush's home state. he was governor there. jeb met with marco rubio yesterday and kasich and cruz today. apparently the meetings went well, he i
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an endorsement from jeb bush, it's big, could boost your poll numbers by as much as 1%, possibly 2%. so bush did not meet with donald trump. donald trump has made a lot of enmeals the last several months but he also, as he has been known to mention, has a lot of friends. >> you know, that's like muhammad ali. he was a friend of mine. michael jackson was actually a very good friend of mine. tom brady is a very good friend of my opinion. bob kraft, tom brady, bill belichick, great friends of mine. ted cruz is a friend of mine. chris christie's a friend of ca. i remember tim russert, he was a friend of mine. herman cain, my friend. my friend elton john. a rich guy from new york city, a friend of mine. a friend of mine who's one of the biggest and richest people in china. chinese, they're friends of mine. i have friends that aren't christian. i have many friends that are muslims. i have friends that are muslims. i have so many jewish
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are reof have friends in ohio. i have friends. i have friend. friends of mine. a friend of mine. friends of mine. friend of mine. friend of mine. friend of mine. friend of mine. friend of mine. friend of mine. friend of mine. friend of mine. i have no friends as far as i'm concerned. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i don't know what to believe now. meanwhile, this is something donald trump could probably work into a campaign ad. because our local fox 11 news in l.a. caught up with a couple that's been camped out in front of a shoe store since friday waiting to buy a pair of these kanye west adidas that might not come out for another two weeks. >> i can't wait. been here since friday. >> these brown adidas supposed to roll out in two weeks. one sneaker head couple has started camping outside shoe palace on melrose, they want to be the first in line when the shoes come in. shoe palace
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putting up a notice saying, there are no guarantees they'll be there. >> hopefully we get them, but for sure we might not be getting them. >> jimmy: wait, for sure you might not be getting them? or you might not be getting them for sure? either way it's time well spent. imagine having three weeks to sit out in front of a shoe store to get a pair? thursday nights we bleep and blur the big tv moments of the week whether they need it or not. it's time for "this week in unnecessary censorship." >> your body's been through some stuff. >> yeah, yeah. and it's currently still going through it. >> i'll show you my [ bleep ] later when the cameras get turned off. >> okay. >> do you support [ bleep ]ing? >> no, i do not support [ bleep ]ing. >> when we come back, ben is going to [ bleep ] kayla and all these women. >> on the show tonight our
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donald fix and the republican party's big swinging [ bleep ]s. >> i'm going to say on behalf of our fans [ bleep ] you. >> your leaders have [ bleep ]ed you, the media has [ bleep ]ed you, universities and colleges have [ bleep ]ed us, except the university of florida. >> first of all i was [ bleep ]ing his [ bleep ] while he was [ bleep ]ing mine. >> everybody wants to hear, yeah, i'd [ bleep ] a man. >> i've never been knocked down or i've never been [ bleep ], [ bleep ]. well, you know what? maybe you should have. you might learn a few things about yourself. >> he also says it's steph curry's world and we're all just sucking his [ bleep ]. >> so i actually [ bleep ]ed girls, i don't know if you knew this, i am the celebrity goat [ bleep ]ing champion, i've never [ bleep ]ed a pig, do you think i could try it? >> there is something different about you today. you seem more evil bodied. >> it must be the long [ bleep ]. >> jimmy: we'll take a break.
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on the roof, ready to drop prizes on pedestrians. you catch it, you keep it when we return. we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ whatcha gonna do when you get outta here? ♪ ♪ i'm gonna have some fun! ♪ what do you consider fun? ♪ fun, natural fun! ow! ♪ i'm in heaven ♪ with my boyfriend, my laughing boyfriend. ♪ ♪ steppin' in a rhythm to a funky flow. ♪ ♪ who needs to think when your feet just go? ♪ ♪ whatcha gonna do when you get outta here? ♪ ♪ i'm gonna have some fun! ♪ fun, natural fun! baby! ...we believe your tax refund should last. all. year. long. don't waste it on a pricey wireless plan. lose the contracts, mystery fees and overages.
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all there's dancing and music in the dark. people are younger and better looking in the dark. see? people wear their most stylish and glamorous clothes in the dark. people gain an irrational sense of invincibility in the dark. in the dark, bowling is less sad, food is more expensive, and making out is much more likely. so if all this good stuff happens in the dark, wouldn't you want a camera that can capture things...
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hi, welcome back. viola davis, isla fisher and music from the sufferers is on the way. it's time to throw things off the roof, "you catch it, you keep it." guillermo, how you doing? >> guillermo: doing great. >> jimmy: what are you wearing guillermo? >> guillermo: this is a harness so i won't fall down. >> jimmy: boy, it really is. i mean, it's on your legs, on yo
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you're not kidding around. >> guillermo: safety first, jimmy. >> jimmy: thank you, guillermo. here's how this will work. guillermo is going to drop a prize off the roof, gravity will take hold, and a contestant waiting below will attempt to catch it. if they catch it they keep it. hence the name of the game. you understand, right, guillermo? >> guillermo: yes, jimmy. >> jimmy: let's go to street level, cousin sal is on hollywood boulevard. >> sal: what's going on? >> jimmy: doing very well. you understand how the game works? >> sal: yes, jimmy, i do. >> jimmy: bring in a pedestrian. this is somebody who was wandering on the street moments ago. if $you have the catch ever's gear or did we loan that to you? >> i brought it. >> jimmy: what is your name? >> halley. >> jimmy: where are you from? >> i'm from toledo, ohio. >> jimmy: toledo, ohio. are you here on vacation? >> yes, i am, spring break. >> jimmy: spring break, wow. who are you here with? >> with some girlfriends. >> how many girlfriends? >> four. >> jimmy: all staying in the same room? >> yeah, actually. >> jimmy: what have you been doing here on spring
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and pretty much everywhere else we can find. >> jimmy: i see. are you 21? >> i'm 20. >> jimmy: you're 20. but you've been getting drunk, true or false? >> false. >> jimmy: false? all right, i don't know if your parents are watching. go ahead and put that face mask on. cousin sal will help you because we do not want to blind anyone. or kill anyone or really do anything to anyone other than give them a prize. we're going to turn the sound off in halley's helmet so she does not know what's about to come down. what is the first item you will be tossing over the ledge? >> guillermo: top of the line, jimmy. this is a chunky drop necklace with four diamonds. >> jimmy: attached to what? >> guillermo: attached to -- blue things over here. >> jimmy: no, attached to a blowup doll? >> guillermo: oh yeah, yeah. yeah. >> jimmy: all right, very good. they're getting better over the
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[ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: all right, don't jump over after her. but here we go. are you ready on the ground? >> sal: ready. >> ready. >> jimmy: they are ready on the ground. guillermo, set the inflatable lady free. >> guillermo: three, two, one -- >> jimmy: here it comes. here she comes. i'm going to blame guillermo for that one. we're going to give you -- go ahead and keep that. you'll have another roommate for the trip. there you go. enjoy. sal, grab somebody else. we have another item. what is your name, sir? >> drew. >> jimmy: where are you from, drew? >> from chicago. >> jimmy: are you good at catching things? >> that's the plan. >> jimmy: very good. go ahead and put that mask on. we want to
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here. guillermo, what do you have to drop on drew? >> guillermo: an order of thai food. >> jimmy: an order of thai food. what is in the order? >> guillermo: shrimp, fried rice, chicken kung pao, mu shu pork. >> jimmy: that doesn't sound thai at all. >> guillermo: that's what it say right here. >> jimmy: none of those items are thai. >> guillermo: mu shu pork. >> jimmy: that's thai, yeah. all right, guillermo. are you ready? >> guillermo: i'm ready. >> jimmy: let's find out if drew is ready. are you ready if. >> i'm ready. >> jimmy: all right, drew. wow. what a great prize you're about to get. here we go. let's count it down, guillermo. >> guillermo: three, two, one -- >> jimmy: oh! oh, drew. let's look at that again in slow
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he was right under it. oh, he was right under it. drew, you were right under it. >> i almost had it. >> jimmy: you did a good job. unfortunately, you did not catch it. you don't get to keep it. >> sal: thai goes to the catcher, right? >> jimmy: very good. thank you, drew. one more. hi, what's your name? >> yvonne. >> jimmy: where are you from? >> florida. >> jimmy: do you think you can do this? so far no success at all. >> i hope to be the third one to do it. >> jimmy: very good. go ahead and put that helmet on, put the mask on. we'll go up to guillermo on the roof. guillermo, you have what? >> guillermo: i have a ball full of money. >> jimmy: a yoga ball full of money? >> guillermo: that's right. >> jimmy: wow, we've loaded it with one dollar bills. there must be $40 in there. >> guillermo: $55. >> jimmy: all right. make sure to shake that up,
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guillermo. >> guillermo: okay. >> jimmy: why are you shaking it? this is not a lottery drawing we're doing here. >> guillermo: so it can look a lot. >> jimmy: all right, okay. let's check back down on the ground. are you ready for this? >> i'm ready. >> jimmy: how good is your vision? >> i have glasses on, so it's 20/20. >> jimmy: what? >> i have glasses on so it's 20/20. >> sal: she's swallowing her mouth guard. >> jimmy: your vision is 20/20? >> i hope it is. >> jimmy: i hope so. i'm wondering why you're wearing glasses if that's the case. be careful. here we go. guillermo, count it down. and drop it. >> guillermo: three, two, one -- >> jimmy: and here it goes. oh, let's look at that again in slow motion. you know what you can have the ball. the hell with it. there you go. all right, yeah, yeah. guillermo, you did a bad job up there. >> guillermo: all right, whatever. >> jimmy: we're trying to get -- later in the show i want you to practice, okay? >> guillermo: okay, jimmy no
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problem. >> jimmy: veg. thank you, guillermo. thank you, cousin sal. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: tonight hot show music from the sufferers, from the brothers grimsby isla fisher, be right back with viola davis! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> announcer: portions of "jimmy kimmel live" are brought to you by collection by michael strahan. available only at select jc penney stores and at "" shopping for an suv? well, this is the time. and your ford dealer is the place, to get 0% financing for 60 months on a ford suv. that's right. just announced. ford explorer...edge...escape... and expedition... are available with 0% financing for 60 months. ford suvs. designed to help you be unstoppable. no wonder ford is america's best selling brand. but hurry, 0% financing for 60 months on ford suvs is a limited time offer. see your ford dealer today. how do they make starburst taste so juicy? they use wicked small fighter jets
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>> jimmy: from the funny new movie "the brothers grimsby" isla fisher is here. from houston, texas, self-titled album "the sufferers" from the samsung stage. next week we've got new shows with kirsten dunst, harry connick jr., superman and wonder woman will be here, henry cavill and gal gadot. also erin andrews, gabourey sidibe, bachelor ben higgins and his mystery mate on maybe not, who knows, he might be here alone. plus music from jake bugg, flogging molly for st patricks day and special performances from sxsw festival from sia, 2 chainz and lil wayne. that's all next week. our first guest is a very gifted
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emmy to prove it. her very popular show "how to get away with murder" wraps up its 2nd season on abc a week from tonight. please welcome the professor herself, viola davis! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: you look fantastic. >> thank you. i've been relaxing since the show, you know, just -- >> jimmy: that's your way of relaxing, eating and drinking? >> eating and drinking and skipping. >> actually skipping? >> sleeping. i do skip also. but, you know. >> jimmy: when was the last time you skip in the do you remember? >> i have a 5-year-old. i skip all the time. >> jimmy: you do? >> even with my bad knees. >> your costar billy was here. he injur
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is that true? [ cheers and applause ] >> billy's ego. >> jimmy: oh, oh really. >> well -- we really went for it. >> jimmy: right. >> i said, listen, i'm always playing these maids, i always got to gain 40 pounds for a role. i said, i want to be sexy! i'm pulling out all the stops! so i went for it. and threw my back out. [ cheers and applause ] and, you know, the director said, slam her up against the wall! and then really go for it, pull your pants down! and i said, i'm going to go for it, go for it! he slams me up against the wall -- six people are behind the wall holding it up. and that thing is like shaking. it sounds sexy, it really wasn't. >> jimmy: no. sounds dangerous is what it sounds like. >> yeah. >> jimmy: how do you --
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home and you say to your husband, oh, my back's killing me from all the sex i had at work today. >> i hid that injury like you would not believe. >> jimmy: you did, yeah. >> bear, bath and body. >> jimmy: i don't know how to approach this. as a man it troubles me. >> yeah? >> jimmy: but from a romantic point of view, i think it's very sweet. you got married to your husband for the third time. >> yes, i did. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: but, but, this is not one of those things where you guys got split up and then got back together. you just have had three weddings. >> i like weddings. >> jimmy: so how does that work? >> the first time we got married, 15 people in our condo. >> jimmy: okay. >> it wasn't big enough. >> jimmy: right. >> three months later, we went to rhode island and got married with about 100 people. and everyone said, you know what? the best photos are the candid ones. so we put disposable cam
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every table, sepia tone, black and white. honey, those kids stomped the hell out of those cameras. they took pictures of the floor, of teeth. there was a lot of toothless people at the second wedding. >> jimmy: family, yeah. >> that's another story. but -- so i wanted to have another ceremony that was pretty, where i got to wear the fabulous dress with the fabulous food. you know. >> jimmy: so you went through the whole thing? >> yeah. >> jimmy: how many people were at this wedding? >> 137 people when all was said and done. a few people that just kind of pushed their way through. then we had the greatest food, we had our signature drink, we called it juvie jules. it's a play on both our names. jewel russ and viola, they call me v, juvie juice, mango juice and tequila. >> jimmy: that's the way to get a party goin
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cocktail, like drinking a fruit punch. >> absolutely. >> jimmy: did you have famous people? was it all family? >> oprah was there. >> jimmy: oh, wow, you really did have famous people. >> my cast members were there. >> jimmy: wow. forget them, how about oprah? >> i didn't care. oprah had a -- she came with steadman. >> jimmy: were you nervous that she would have a good time? did you have somebody assigned to her to make sure she enjoyed herself? >> no. >> jimmy: no? >> i sat down with oprah. oprah came. she was very, very chill. she looked cute. everybody had to wear white. >> jimmy: oh, really, okay. >> i'll tell you the one person who definitely was not fazed by oprah was my daughter. there's a pick and roll tour of her and oprah where she's just -- >> jimmy: really? >> so everybody was just super chill. >> jimmy: okay. >> yeah she just, you know. >> jimmy: did she get you a gift? did oprah get you anything? were gifts accepted at this -- >> oprah did not give me a gift. >> jimmy: oh!
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. >> i didn't ask her to give me a gift. she invited us to her house, which i said now oprah, julius and i will be at your doorstep with genesis. until you tell us to leave, we are going to be at your house. >> jimmy: you're not going anywhere. i got you a gift. i mean, i'm sure it's not as good as whatever oprah's probably planning to send you. [ cheers and applause ] we wrapped it really nicely in this office depot storage box. but i think this is something that you can use, you can always use, you never have enough of this. this is for julius. this is a robe. >> i love this. >> jimmy: his initials on it. and then we also got you a robe with your initials on it. [ cheers and applause ] >> awesome. you know what, jimmy? >> jimmy: what? >> at first i thought it was going to be a
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you know when you get a crappy gift and you have to have that face? i'm glad it was a great gift. >> jimmy: yeah. [ cheers and applause ] i'll put it in the box. you should see the look on the people at the robe places face, "i'd like a robe with vd on it." >> i haven't heard that one before. >> jimmy: yeah, your parents didn't think that out, i guess. >> they didn't even give me a middle name. >> jimmy: so of course next week is the finale, season finale. but the show has been picked up for a third season. >> yes. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we know there is more murder to come. the murdering will continue. i assume. >> i can't tell you that. >> jimmy: wouldn't it be -- >> you're always trying to be sneaky. >> jimmy: do you even know what's going to happen next season? >> no, i do not. >> jimmy: you do not have an idea? >> no, and you can't make me tell you. you keep asking that question. >> jimmy: well, i'm curious to know. i wonder if you try to find out?
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shonda, oh, doesn't matter, i'll do whatever she says i should do when i get there. >> i signed a seven-year contract, which means that i kind of have to go along with it a little bit. >> jimmy: right. >> pete norwalk, creator of the show, he likes when it's crazy. he likes when it's sexually crazy -- >> jimmy: he almost killed you sexually, yeah. >> he did, yeah. >> jimmy: do you think poete likes it when it's sexually crazy in his personal life as well? [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] sometimes people, when they're writing, they're expressing their fantasies. >> here's the thing, doesn't everybody like it a little bit freaky? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: viola davis, the season finale of "how to get away with hurt" airs a week from tonight at 10:00 here on abc. be right back!
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♪ whatcha gonna do when you get outta here? ♪ ♪ i'm gonna have some fun! ♪ ♪ what do you consider fun? ♪ ♪ fun, natural fun! ♪ yeah, we rocking right now. ♪ ♪ there's a party over here. ♪ ♪ hey, i'm in heaven. ♪ that's not fair, he should give you your rollerblades back. anddddd, she's back. storm coming? a very dangerous cheese storm. so you have 20 more bags.
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♪ ♪ ♪ ♪pepsi cola
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>> jimmy: welcome back to the show. isla fisher and music from the suffers is on the way but right now thanks to the folks over at samsung it's time for a bonus round of "you catch ,
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let's go to hollywood boulevard to my cousin sal, sal, who do we have out there? we can barely see this person. >> i'm babes. >> jimmy: is that your given name, babs? >> it's not. >> jimmy: what is your real name? >> barbara. >> jimmy: barbara. it's rare to see a young woman named barbara nowadays. >> exactly. >> jimmy: where are you from, babs. >> budapest but i live here now. >> jimmy: what? >> yeah. >> jimmy: you live in l.a.? >> i live in l.a. now? babs from budapest? >> yep. >> jimmy: thank you. all right, babs. have you ever had catcher's gear on before? >> no, it feels really weird. >> jimmy: if you catch what guillermo drops you'll get this new samsung galaxy s7 edge, you pill take on it a trip to south by southwest to austin, texas.
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that's right. this is a three day music festival exclusively for galaxy owners, with performances from 2 chainz and li'l wayne. how does that sound? >> that is so awesome. [ cheers and applause ] >> sal: he's just kidding. >> jimmy: no, i'm not kidding. >> sal: you're not? >> jimmy: we have an austin-themed item for you to catch tonight. let's go to the roof where guillermo is standing by. what does babs have to catch here? let us see it. because we cannot see what is inside. that's a hat full of queso? >> guillermo: that's right, jimmy. >> jimmy: that is a delicious melted cheese item. it's one of the tastiest things you can put in a hat. it's popular in austin. back to babs, are you ready? >> yeah. >> sal: got her. >> i'm ready, i guess. >> jimmy: guillermo, are you ready? >> guillermo: i'm ready, jimmy. >> jimmy: count it down. drumroll, please. >> guillermo
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>> jimmy: release the queso. there it goes. oh my goodness, babs. let's look at that in slow motion and see what went wrong there. what happened? yeah, we were way off target. but you know what we did come up with a special rule for this particular contest. if you get any queso on you, you win the prizes, so grat lations. [ cheers and applause ] you get the new samsung galaxy s7 edge, tickets to galaxy life fest, and a trip to south-by-southwest have fun! we'll be right back with isla fisher.
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t banks had their way. they crashed our economy. but democrat donna edwards won't take their money because she stands up for us. as a single mom, she knows the challenges our families face. she'll be our voice. tightening regulations on the big banks and fighting to keep dark money out of politics. democrat donna edwards, maryland's next senator. >> jimmy: hi, welcome back. you know our next guest from "the great gatsby," "wedding crashers" and many films, next, you can see her alongside husband sacha baron cohen, in a new movie that goes deeper into the sex lives of elephants than any movie before. >> we need to head inside, find schmitt, seduce her. >> never. >> you need to seduce her i
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order to find out what he bought from her husband. >> okay. >> can you see lena schmitt? easy to spot, wearing a green dress, she's absolutely gorgeous. >> she is gorgeous. >> jimmy: "the brothers grimsby" opens in theaters tomorrow, please welcome isla fisher! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: it's very good to see you. >> you too, i'm very good, thank you. >> jimmy: good to have you here. i have to say, i'm sure you know, we showed a clip of "brothers grimsby" on the show to the studio audience only. >> yeah. >> jimmy: and people were traumatized. people as they left, people told me, i'm
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again. >> yeah. >> jimmy: it was wildly hilarious. >> so funny. we showed it to an average american family, the kardashians -- >> jimmy: you did? >> they also loved it. they laughed the whole way through. >> jimmy: what do you mean you showed it to the kardashians? >> mutual friends. yeah, she hooked us up with them, they came over, we showed them bestiality as you do. >> jimmy: wow. >> they loved the movie. >> jimmy: wow. well. so go the kardashians, thus goes the rest of the country. wow. now this is a photograph from the uk premiere of the film. that's you and your husband. now, when you dress up and you look very beautiful for the movie premiere then your husband, does he tell you i'm going to only be wearing underpants and carrying a gun? or is this a surprise? >> you know, i was just super grateful he wasn't freeballing it. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: something to be grateful for. yeah, yeah. well. by the way, you
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true, i heard that at the oscars when sacha did ale g., they told him not to do it? >> right. after he dumped kim jong-il's ashes on ryan seacrest he was banned. >> jimmy: he was on probation. >> right. but then he managed to wrangle his way in because we wanted to promote the movie. but he said, i want to sneak in and do ali g. but i can't fit the costume on my body because of the metal detectors, they'll be suspicious, sweetie will you fit a giant yellow glasses, hat, weird inside your spanx? >> jimmy: you were like a drug mule for him? >> yep. you could say that. actually, you know, you're used to taking hair off down there to go to events. instead of adding considerable amount of beard. then i had to fit the yellow glasses. i had to ins
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it was a challenge to sit down. >> jimmy: you brought video. >> oh, yeah, i did? oh, yeah. >> jimmy: you're in the bathroom at the oscars. >> right, yes. i am really stressed out, actually, while i was doing this. i've never put a beard on before. usually women are taking it off. >> jimmy: you're an accomplice to maybe a crime, i don't know what we would call this here. >> is it a crime? i don't know if it's a crime. >> jimmy: i don't know, i think the oscars are kind of like -- >> am i never getting invited again? >> jimmy: yeah, no, you're never getting -- yeah. >> oh, no. >> jimmy: i'm sure you'll be invited again. >> unless i pretend to be amy adams. >> jimmy: that would work, yeah. >> you know what, though, i was really tense. while we're in the bathroom, we had to sneak in for 45 minutes. people would bang on the door, they're wearing hit sets, and i'm really scared of authority, i'm goody two shoes. honey, this isn't going to work! i had to go out and i said, something is wrong
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stomach. it's really bad. >> jimmy: oh, really. >> i had to lie to everyone. which made me feel guilty. they gave me these tums. i thought, it looks suspicious. so i had to eat them. i thought otherwise -- anyway. i ate the tums. jennifer garner's knocking on the door trying to go to the bathroom. it was so stressful. >> jimmy: oh no. then he popped out at the last minute. >> with a full ali g. gear onstage with olivia wilde. >> jimmy: did olivia know what was going on? >> no, i saw her face. she was like, oh no. >> jimmy: afterwards did you get yelled at or anything? >> at that point i went straight to the bar. i'm not going to lie. >> jimmy: you did? >> i bumped into eddie redmayne and had a drink and i felt embarrassed. is. ed every interview on the bred carpet, they'd say, what are you wearing? i'd say, eddie redmayne was going to wear this but i beat him to it, which was my dumb joke. >> jimmy: you got in a lot of trouble that sunday night, you might not b
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los angeles anymore, never mind the oscars. >> yeah, you know. >> jimmy: sacha mentioned he will stay in character the whole time during the whole movie. >> yeah. >> jimmy: does that apply to you, his wife? does he stay in character with you when you were on the set? >> actually, yes and no. i actually got a bit -- he wrote me this character in the movie. he wrote the script. and i had to do a scene where i was kissing mark strong. my husband was in the room playing nobby. i walked into the scene, kissed mark strong. which was written in the script. >> jimmy: by him. >> correct. and my husband goes, what are you doing? what are you doing? i said -- and i thought, is he joking? is he nobby? what's happening? he said, don't do that again, please. and i thought, oh, he's joking, whatever. i walked into the scene again the next take. and i kissed mark strong. and then he's like, you know what? don't do that again, it's really upsetting me. and i said, but you wrote it in the script. he said, i'm rewriting it right now, don't do it. and i was like, oh my god, this is so unprofessional. >> jimmy: that's how it
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>> no, then i was like -- i don't know whether it's nobby or sacha but clearly it's not going to happen again. >> jimmy: you know what the problem is, your husband is out of his mind. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> what does that say about me? because i married him. intervention. >> jimmy: you are out of your mind by proxy. that movie advice, very funny. >> by the way, he kisses everybody. >> jimmy: and he kisses everybody. >> will ferrell in "talladega nights." the heavy guy in "borat." the ginger guy in "bruno." mark strong -- do i look masculine? >> jimmy: not at all, no, you do not. it's very good to see you. congratulations. "the brothers grimsby." it opens in theaters tomorrow. isla fisher, everybody! be right back with the sufferers! >> announcer: "the jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by samsung.
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i think we should've taken a tarzan know where tarzan go! tarzan does not know where tarzan go. hey, excuse me, do you know where the waterfall is?
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no, me tarzan, king of jungle. why don't you want to just ask somebody? if you're a couple, you fight over directions. it's what you do. if you want to save fifteen percent or more on car insurance, you switch to geico. oh ohhhhh it's what you do. ohhhhhh! do you have to do that right in my ear? >> announcer: "the jimmy kimme
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presented by samsung. >> jimmy: i want to thank viola davis, isla fisher and apologize to matt damon, we ran out of time. he'll be rescheduled. night lin is next. but first, this is their self-titled album here with the song "midtown", the suffers. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ let's go back to that bar off mcgowen we used to love ♪ ♪ with deep red painted walls white frames and old glass surrounding us ♪ ♪ well how's your life now did you marry that girl that you talked about ♪ ♪ well i hope you made you made it real but sometimes can't lie i wish it was me still ♪
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♪ do you ever wanna go back go back to you and me ♪ ♪ 'cause sometimes i need to go back go back to you and me ♪ ♪ do you ever wanna go back go back to you and me ♪ ♪ please let's go back to that bar off mcgowen we used to love ♪ ♪ with deep red painted walls white frames and old glass surrounding us ♪ ♪ but did you ever learn that it's not all about you i'm fore
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♪ 'cause you're not tryin' change mmmm ♪ ♪ do you ever wanna go back go back to you and me ♪ ♪ 'cause sometimes i need to go back go back to you and me ♪ ♪ did you ever think to go back go back to you and me ♪ ♪ hey go back go back
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♪ yeah yeah yeah go back go back go back go back ♪ ♪ oh babe i want to go ♪ oh babe can we go go go oh babe ♪ ♪ boy i want to go go go
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this is "nightline." >> tonight, celebrity twitter war. over kim kardashian's naked selfie. the sexy star slamming her haters. and an unlikely ally for kim k., kanye's ex amber rose telling us why she's now defending kim. >> if any sexy guy posted a nude picture, everybody would be like, he's hot, he's sexy. it's just a double standard. >> but it's not just hollywood's problem. we explore the very real consequences of social shaming. plus just call it nascar on ice. we're with seasonal speed demons in frosty minnesota where the only thing harsher than the howling wind is the fiery competition. but first the "nightline 5."


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