tv Late Night With Seth Meyers NBC November 22, 2018 12:37am-1:37am EST
>> announcer: from 30 rockefeller plaza in new york, it's "late night with seth meyers." tonight -- daniel radcliffe, comedian arjen lubach, cooking with "queer eye's" antoni porowski, featuring the 8g band with fred armisen. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, seth meyers. >> seth: good evening. i'm seth meyer this is "late night." how is everybody doing tonight? [ cheers and applause ] that is just wonderful to hear. in that case, let's get to the news. president trump will spend ks thving at his mar-a-lago resort in florida. and he's going to go around thee table and makeone say why they're thankful for him.
[ laughter ] that's right. president trump will spend thanksgiving at his mar-a-lago resort in florida. d if you're curious what melania is making, a run for itg [ er ] [ applause ] after president trump call a judge who ruled against his asylum policy "an obama judge," chief justice john roberts today defend federal judges and said quote, "we do not have obama judges or trump judges, bush judges or clinton judges." they do however have two judges appointed by grover cleveland. [ laughter ] [ applause ]pr lawyers foident trump said yesterday that they have provided special counsel robert mueller's team written answers to questions in the russia investigation. and i don't think the answers are going to help his ca. [ laughter ] [ applause ]
"the washington post" has published a profile on a soviet era intimacy book known as "the socialist kama sutra." the way it works is everybody gets some. [ laughter ] that was a joke about socialism and [ bleep ]. [ laughter ] not easy to do. [ laughter and applause ] a norwegian cruise liner has announced it will power a fleet of sheeps -- eeps. [ laughter ] in norway, they don't have boats. the navy uses sheeps. a norwegian cruise liner has announced it will powea fleet of ships using dead fish. that's right, a ship pered by ted cruz's handshakes. [ cheers and applause ]g accord "the washington post," of the 22 charities that
canceled events at esident trump's mar-a-la resort after he failed to denounce the white nationalist rally in charlottesville, only two have opted to sume holding events at the club. atid the two charities, "please stop calling us [ laughter ] we're people. also, we need to borrow some money." [ laughter ] archaeologists in pompeii this inek found erotic art feat greek mythological characters that was hidden under ash ier cent archaeologists suspected it was porn after noticing the pot it was stored in. finally, a website has posted a thanksgiving recipe for a hot turkey in an oven bag that calls for covering a turkey in crushed hot puff cese sticks. incidentally, hot puff cheese sticks in a bag is the secret service's code name for trump. [ cheers and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, we have a fantastic show for you tonight. li is starring in the new
broadway play, "thspan of a fact" currently running at studio 54 now through january 13th. daniel radclifyb is back, evy. [ cheers and applause ] he is a very funny comedian and the host of "zondag met lubach," which airs weekly on npo 3 in the netherlands, arjen lubach io ing us tonight. so happy that we're going to im speak to and here to cook up a thanksgiving dish, he is the on food experetflix's "queer eye" and the owner of village den in new york city. antoni porowski is here. so we're here on a great night. [ cheers and applause ] before we get to that, president trump is turning on some of his closest allies while standing by the one that pays him, saudi arabia. for more on this, it's time for "a closer look." ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: trump did a sit down interview with fox news over the weekend. and in at interview, he said some things that might technically qualify as news.th
but ong he says that was news to nobody was when he described his decision-making process and made clear he doesn't real have one. >> when you're sitting at the desk, how do you make decisions? i mean, do them?onize over do you second guess yourself? how does -- >> i don't think about it. i don't think about, you know, how i make them. [ light laughter ] >> seth: yeah, yeah,e know. laughter ] it's one of the symptoms. i imagine trump makes decisions the same way netflix's algorithm suggests something totally random for you to watch. did you enjoy "the migrant caravan?" then you might also like "raking in finland." [ laughter ] so while there's no process to donald trump's decision, there is one central operating principle.d at's loyalty. it doesn't matter who you are or how decorated you are, all trump cares abt is whether you are nice to him or mean to him. that's why trump attacked retired admiral william mcraven, a navy seal who oversaw the operatiobito kill osamladen. ssraven has criticized trump's attacks on the pcalling him a threat to democracy.
but when trump was asked about , mcrae falsely accused him of being a hillary clinton supportejust because hillary had reportedly considered him as a possible running mate in 2016. >> bill mcraven, retired admira navy seal, 37 years, former head of u.s. special operations. >> hillary clinton fan. >> special operations? >> excuse me, hillary clinton fan. >> seth: i'm so happy we have a president who blurts stuff out like a "price is right" audience member. "hillary clinton. $1!" [ laughter ] trump has also tried to weaponize the criminal justice system against his political opponents for the same reason he attacked mcraven. he wants to punish them for their disloyalty. and he's being egged on by fox news.y, yesterthe new york times" reported that trump wanted to order the justice department to prosecute himes comey and ary clinton. some of his more vocal supporters stirred his anger including the fox news commentator jeanine pirro who has railed repeatedly on h weekly show that the president is being ill-served by the justice department.y so not o the president a
wannabe dictator who thinks he can jail whoever he wants, he also genuinely believes all the insane stuff he sees on fox news. trump probably sits there all day tching fox and shouting his aides -- "prosecute hillary. stop the caran. and ask my doctor if otezla is right for me. [ laughter ] why can't i have otezla?" trump doesn't care that hillary di 't actually break any la or that mcraven is a navy seal e ancorated military hero who led a mission to kill the world's most wanted terrorist.rs all that mato trump is whether you're loyal. and sure enough, trump is now questioning the loyalty of the man who was constitutionally speaking closer to him anyone else in the federal government. ee >> in recent with his electoral prospects two years from now, much on his mind, . trhaums focused on the person who has most publicly tethered his fortunes to him. inne conversation after another, he has asked aides and advisers a pointed question, is mike penceoyal?
>> seth: damn, now he's questioning mike pence? how paranoid can you be? mike pence has spent two years r doing hing he can to suck up to trump. i mean, he literally copies trump's physical mannerisms. remember that time trump put his the ground e o during a meeting, and then, pence immediately did the same thing? [ laughter ] i mean, look at that. pence is like a pageant mom who's doing his daught routine along with her from the audience. [ laughter ] and clap then spin then step, step, step and jazzy. for trump, loyty only goes one way. there's no better example of that than the man who's arguably eloser to trump than anyon in the world, fox news host sean hannity. just tgive you an idea of how loyal hannity is to trump, it was reported a few months ago that hannity has trump's direct ipone line. and they talk mu times a day including after the fox news host wraps up taping his show most week nights. can you imagine that conversation? it's probably the phone call version of two dogs sniffing each other's but. [ laughter ]
and everyone in the white house knows it's happening. because trump will walk around flaunting the fact that hannity calls him every day.af a white house r aware that the calls happen thanks to the president entering a room and an uncing, "i just hung up with hannity." no one has parlayed the president into less impressive celebrity friends. i mean, jfk used the presidency to hangout with marilyn monroe. trump plays phone-a-friend with the hun embodiment of a christmas ham. [ laughter ] [ applause ] sean hammity. so that's how close -- [ laughter ] -- that's how close those two are. or at least that's how close hannity thought they were until last week when "the daily beast" reported that trump calls hannity a "suck-up" behind his back.pe trump has edly made fun of hannity's interviewing skills and called hannity's softball questions "dumb."
now i think i know what hannity did to anger trump. you see, hannity has spe on his show defending trump from one especially salacious rumor about a certain sex act in a moscow hotel room, a rumor so salaous that we will not sto to repeat the details of it here on this show. but as we pointed out before, sean hannity often repeats all the embarrassing detai of that specific rumor on his tv show, which is watched by millions of people. and i feel like it might have started to annoy trump. because hannity -- hannity just won't leit go. >> remember that's the dossier that talked about trump at a rio -carlton in moscow with prostitutes urinating on his bed. the fake document about president trump and that goes to the ritz-carlton and that goes to hookers. russians and the ritz-carlton and hookers. you know, talking about hookers and urinating in beds. hookers, ritz-carlton, urinatin. on a b [ light laughter ] the ritz-carlton and hookers. russian hookers. hoump, hookers, hookers, hookers, hookersokers, hookers, hookers, hookers, g urinatinin his bed. peeing, urinating, urinating, na urinating,ting, urinating,
urinate. hookers at a ritz-carlton in moscow urinating in the be employing a number of prostitutes to perform golden showers or urination. >> seth: so hannity thought it was a good idea to go on his sh and read in detail the single most embarrassing rumor about his friend, the president. mean, now i know why trump is mad at him. or should i say pissed? [ cheers and applause ] whether it's hannity or pence, anyone who gets close to trump eventually learns his loyalty has a limit. there's really only y to ensure that trump will stand by you no matter what. and that's simple, to pay him off. that's the lesson saudi arabia l rning this week amid a firestorm over the murder of "washington post" columnist and u.s. rident jamal khashoggi. we know for a fact that trump has financial ties to saudi arabia. because he told us. >> i love the saudis. many are in this building. saudi arabia, and i get along great with all of them. they buy apartments from me. s thnd $40 million, $50 million.
am i supposed to dislike them? i like them very much.ud saarabia -- i like the saudis. they're very nice. i make a lot of money with them. they buy all sorts of my stuff. all kinds of toys from trump. >> seth: toys? he soundlike a guy on the street selling knockoff legos. [ laughter ] t "they don't snether. you got to use duct tape." [ laughter ] trump's financial ti to saudi arabia might explain why he's been so reluctant to condemn the kingdom for murdering a journalist and u.s. resident. yesterday, trump was asked why he was siding withhe oppressive regime over his own intelligence agency. and he gave an answer that made no sense whatsoever. ec >>se it's america first to me. it's all about america first.ha >> seth: no,s not america first. that's saudi arabia first. this guy is george orwell's worst nightmare, including the fact that his brain stopped developing in 1984. [ laughter ] the president is an authoritarian who lomands lty and punishes his enemies. he'll turn on even the people closest to him. but he'll and by you as long
as you shower him with gold, also known as -- >> golden showers. >> seth: this has been "a closer look." [ cheers and applause ] ♪ we'll be back with our friend daniel radcliffe, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> for more of seth's "closer looks," be sure to subscribe to "late night" on youtube. ♪ i'm always going to be a maker. and i think a company is the coolest thing you can build. i'm adam, and i make robots. you never know when inspiration is going to strike. so i take my surface pro everywhere. part of an entrepreneur's job is to get stuff done. i like to do, like, four things at once. the new surface pro can handle all of my programs. i can paint, i can mold, i can code. i have it on all the time, it's fantastic. we get to build toys for kids and change the world. it's a big deal. kay's blafour days only. event.
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back, everyby. please give it up for the 8g band right over there. [ cheers and applause ] also, we have been so happy this week to have our friend, fred armisen back on drums. always a delight, fred. [ cheers and applaus and fred, you have been so busy recently workingn incredible projects. and you were lamenting to me that the price you pay for your schedule and how packed full of work it is, is you do not have time to read fiction which breaks your heart. because you love fiction. >> fred: i love books, yeah. >> seth: yeah. you did tell me that you have found a solution to your proble which is you hveloped a skill wherein you can look at the cover of a book. and from the cover alone, you can deduce the entire plot, all the characters, everything. >> fred: yeah, that's all i need. >> seth: and you get the full experience of reading the book just by looking at the cover. >> fred: yeah. [ laughter ] >> seth: do you mind if we test this one more time? >> fred: sh:e. >> st is truly amazing to watch.
one more time, "fred judges a book by its cover." ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: ready bud? >> fred: yes. >> seth: all right, here we go. this is, "juror #3" by james patterson th nancy allen. fred, what is this book about? >> fred: so yeah, james patterson and nancy allen, they got togethe and they just wanted to write a book. >> seth: uh-huh. >> and it's about a play. it's a playwright. and this playwright, he's like, pl"i want to write my firs. but all i have is these rolls of carpet -- [ laughter ] -- at this -- at this carpet shop.it so i'll a play. and i'll have -- i'm going to stage it so that the carpet is, you know, rolled up along the sides. and the audience can watch it." [ light laughter ] and he sets it up. but in his stage directions, he writes, "enter from the left." and unfortunately thr, their back was to the audience the whole time doing the monologue. so the audience is watching this play with thispe ct. done against the wall, this backdrop of clouds.
prisingly the play was a hit. >> seth: oh. [ laughter ] >> fred: and the booust about what it's like to have a hit play, you know. travel the country a just become bigger and bigger. and that's what it is, "juror #3." >> seth: wow. >> fred: yeah. >> seth: is um -- yeah. [ eers and applause ] wow. so the stage direction was enter from the left? >> fred: right, righ left meaning the actor's left. so from -- >> seth: b the actor got it -- oh, they so -- the actor entered but looked the wrong way? >> fred: yes. >> seth: yeah. >> fred: what you're seeing now is what the audience was seeing. >> seth: gotcha. can i -- can i -- do you mind if i read you what the publisher says the book's about? >> fred: sur >> seth: okay. "the murder of a woman from one of the town's oldest famils has rosedale mississippi's upper crust howling for blood. and the town prosecutor is counti on ruby bozarth's inexperience to help him deliver a swift conviction." >> fred: that seems right. yeah. something in there -- okay, so somewhere in the book -- all right, great. give it up for fred armisen, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] our first guest tonight is a
talented actor you know om his role in the "harry potter" franchise. he's currently starring in "e lifespan of a fact" running through january 13th at studio 54 please welcome back to the show our friend, daniel radcliffe, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ >> seth: welcome back. >> thank you very much. thank you for having me again. >> seth: we're so, so happy to have you --ou >> oh, thank thank you. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: back in new york city. >> yeah. >> seth: so thrilled. >> that's very nice of you. thank you very much. >> seth: and you -- this is nice to have you here.re yobviously working. >> yeah. >> seth: that's why you're in new york. but you get to do thanksgiving in new york. >> yes. yeahg yeah. i'm do my girlfriend and i are hosting for the first time. >> seth: is that something you've dfie before? not time. >> no, i've never done that before. so yeah, i thought i'm just to make myself -- you know, i can't cook.ng so i'm go just make myself as useful as humanly possible. i thought i was going to be so doin maybe chopping of things. i found out yesterday i'm not going to be trusted with
chopping. >> sett' wow. >> tprobably a good decision. >> seth: 'cause chopping is the lowest as far as -- >> no, no, no. stirring is the lowest. >> seth: stirring is -- you're right. stirring is lower. >> srring is lower. >> seth: so are they going to have you doing a little stirring? >> i'm going to be stirring. i'm going to maybe crushing things -- >> seth: oh, that's good. >> -- if that's>>equired, yeah. eth: how many people are you hosting? >> nine. >> seth: okay. s >> which is e families will laugh at that paltry amount of people. but for me, that's mow, people then i've, you k had in one group. >> seth: yeah. >> outside of thin kind of room long time. >> seth: turkey though? >> yup. >> seth: okay. >> turkey and then a bunch of sides. and, yes, we've got a vegetarian. so we sorted them out. o they've got ion. i've got a friend who's allergic to nuts. they're sorted. [ laughter ] so, yeah, i've really just been -- it's been a week of yb finding out evy's dietary restrictions. [ laughter ] >> seth: yeah, that is the new problem this day and age. >> yes. >> set raises the level of difficulty. >> yeah. >> seth: will you watch -- we talked before. >> football. yeah, yeah, yeah. >> seth: you became a football fan. an american -otball fan. will you be watching? >> absolutely, yeah. >> seth: okay. >> that's -- that will be the, sort of, soundtrack of the day. and my girlfriend's from michigan. ll be -- there's always a lions game on thanksgiving.
>> seth: oh, that's good. >> with the misery or joy that that entails. >> seth: y not, misery, yeah. >> it has been. >> seth: yeah. >> but, you know, it's -- i feel like there's a certain, you know -- heartbreak is parttsf being a gian. >> seth: oh, okay. >> in a way that is sort of about a lot -- you know, being o an englishall fan is also -- >> seth: right. >> -- sort of in some way -- well, growing up was, you know, mid in with a lot of heartbreak and missed penalties. >> seth: yeah. >> yeah. >> seth: and was the world cup ? exciting for y i know in the end -- >> yes. >> seth: -- it ended in tears. but that was -- >> no but that's the furthest e.they've gone in my lifet >> seth: yeah. >> that was amazing. >> seth: yeah. [ laughter ] >> don't laugh at that. just 'cause you're america and you win stuff all the time. [ laughter ] i remember the first time i -- we were in germany. the date that evyone in england grows up knowing is 1966 is the year england won the worlcup. and that's engrained in all of us. and i remember the fire i went to germany and realized no one there has any idea that's what happened that year or in any other country. it's not famous. it's just, we really hang onto that. i know you've won it so many me you don't hang on to the one year that you won it 50 years ago." [ laughter ] >> seth: yeah. but it gets sadder with every year that passes. 'cause the thing that you're proud of gets a year older.
>> further and further away, yeah.in but i waermany this year for the world cup, which was great. 'cause, you know, they got in hotel kind of early. and we did really well. [ laughter ] >> seth: there you go. >> for once.h: >> shere you go. that's something to hang your hat on. >> yeah. >> seth: so this show -- >> yes. >> seth: this is a play where you play aact checker. >> yes. >> seth: and you're dealing with a reporter who maybe doesn't am have thelove of facts that your character does. >> yeah, i should say he's not much a reporter as he's an author. he's written, kind of, an essay. and he deals in, sort of, -- it's -- it is about fact checking. but it's -- the thing that you can't -- we're not a particarly political play where you can't say the word "fact" at the moment without it ng a political statement. and this is -- and that is obviously -- we're very topical in that way.ut we're not dealing with trump and that stuff and fake news. we don't, kind of, get into all that. but it's m debate about artistic license and how far you can push something as a writer. but it -- all that other stuff a is encompasswell. and it's 85 minutes long and really funny. y h, that's me selling it to you. >> seth: that's a good sell. [ cheers and applause
you went -- you actually went and worked a job as a fact checker at "new yorker" -- at "the new yorker."he >> yeah,let me -- they very, very kindly, "the new yorker" invited me to spend a day with their -- or a few hours with their fact checking department. and they were -- who were all amazing and just these super bright, young people who, you know, i'm very grater existing. and we -- yeah, and they -- i didn'teally take it in when they said "oh, you're going to come. and we'll make you fact check an article." i was like, "okay, cool. yeah, i'll come and see stuff. what's going on?" and then i went and they were like, "no, you'rgoing to get the phone to somebody and actually fact check this restaurant review." and i suddenly -- i did. i got way more nervous about that than i do about doing the play every night or anything. just because suddenly you're on the phone with somody who expects -- he knows he's getting a call from "the new yorker."ig >> seth:. >> he doesn't know it's an actor playing around at being a fact checker. >> seth: right.ug [ er ] >> he's expecting a level of professionalism that i didn't know if i had in me. so, yeah. >> seth: how do you fact check a restaurant review? do you call up and say, "was the soupold?" >> yeah. [ light laughter ] >> seth: you do?
>> you literally -- you track every -- that's when i started underling the article which is what you do when you start checking something and underline everything you think is a fact. i was like, "oh, every -- every ingredient is -- counts as a fact." m so i guess i got to ask about, "do you put all these things in?" and it was -- you know, my -- my big moment wasinding out that something was not, in fact, seasoned with old bay. it was seasoned with adobe and chili. >> seth: wow. [ laughter ] >> yeah. and that was -- that was -- and but, you k you don't know how much satisfaction i got from then seeing that restaurant review with the correct information. >> setng yeah. >> knohat i had been a part of that. >> seth: that's is -- >> anyways -- >> seth: that's fact checker's dream is to catch one. >> i know. [ laughter ] oh, god. >> seth: yeah. i mean i wou have gotten off the phone. and even though it doesn't make sense, i would have screamed, "stop the presses." [ laughter ] >> quickly! we can't run it like this. bu yeah, no -- and it was it's really like -- i don't know there was something really inspirational about going into g the "new yorker" and seew it's all done. also, i did almost feel like saying at the end, "if you've te
ever gany really low stakes articles you need checking, i'm happy to do that. i'm happy to calout --" the guy i had to call was a very, very nice chef who made my job very easy.ul i 't like to be doing that job if i did have to call, you know, sarah sanders or somebody -- seth: yeah. >> -- who's like, does not want to hear from you. >> seth: yeah, that's true. she might not want to hear from anybody, though. [ laughter ] there are certain people that just don't like it when the phone rings. >> yeah, yeah. >> seth: yeah. >> that's fair enough.nd >> seth: wonderful cast, obviously. cherry jones and -- >> yes. >> seth: bobby cannavale, which all should be noted. i want to ask about this. because obviously, you're on broadway. there is a show on broadway right no you're very familiar with the origin story of one of the characrs. there is a "harry potter" show on broadway. >> yes. >> seth: m going to see it? you >> i've been asked this a lot. and i feel like i'm -- i'm -- you know, always give a really boring, terrible answer. i'm probably not going to. i don't have plans to. t because i think it would, you know, throw me into some sort of existential crisis of , lih, is that what happened? is that -- should i be --" [ laughter ] but more so i feel lik it would not be a relaxing evening at the theater.
>> seth: sure, i agree with that. >> i feel like i would be being watched for my reaction. and maybe that is mpletely conceited and egotistical and people wouldn't care. but i do feel like it might -- if i was just surrounded by "harry potter" fans, i would fe like it would be a little odd. >> seth: yeah. and i think it's fair say that if someone is a super "harry potter" fan and they want to see that play, if they're sitting next to daniel radcliffe, that's going to be a distraction from the art. [ laughter ] es. i think so as well. that's true as well. >> seth: yeah. >> there's many reasons to not go in. >> seth: have you considered going in disguise? >> the thing about a disguise is if it stops working, then you're just a dude who wore a disguise. [ laughter ] >> seth: yeah.>> nd i remember there was one year when me and rupert grint de up at -- we were at reading music festival together. and for whatever reason -- 'cause we were young, cool, and wagy, we had somebody -- we had access to old worlii gas masks. so we put them on. and we're running around at a concert. and then it got really hot very quickly. and it was very hard to breathe in them. so we just took them off.
and th everyone went from, "who are those two idiots in gas masks" to, "oh, look who that is." it was not a goofeeling. [ laughter ] swore me off disguises. seth: i think on both counts you're making the right decision. >> yeah.h: >> st's just always such a pleasure. >> thank you for having me on. >> seth: happy thanksgiving. >> happy thanksgiving to you. >> seth: congrats on the show.mu >> thank you s. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: daniel radcliffe, everybody. "the lifespan of a fy t" is curren broadway at studio 54. we'll be right back with arjen lubach, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: our next guest is a ry unny dutch comedian who hosts the political comedy show, "sunday with lubach" in the netherlands. he's about to kick off his european standup tour. please welcome to th arjen lubach, everne. [ cheers and applause ] ? >> seth: how are y >> i'm very well. thank you. >> seth: i should say -- [ sp i know a little bit of dutch.
>> yes, you do. >> seth: that was it, though. >> yeah? [ light laughter ] >> seth: and i'm out.t' >> tan embarrassment for you. >> seth: yes, it is. >> and this s for me, yeah. >> seth: but the thing is -- obviously, we met this summer at the 25th anniversary of the theater i used to work at in amsterdam caed boom chicago. >> that's right. >> seth: the problem and why i never learned dutch is of coursa the dutch english incredibly well. >> yeah. yeah, i started off wrong. but i'm trying. >> seth: you're back on a track. >> yeah, yeah, yeah. >> seth: i want to a -- you have a very popular television show in holland. you are very well known there. is it nice to be in new york and be a little bit more anonymous? >> that is actually very nice for a while, yeah.'c se i've been -- i've been the show for four years now. and it's getting worse and worse. i mean, walking down the street is, most of the time it's fun. i mean you can probably relate. >> seth:urse. >> people say some nice things. but there was one embarrassing thing that just happened to me recently. i was in a bar in amsterdam. you lived in amsterdam so you know these bars. >> seth: yes. >> yeah. >> seth: yeah. >> yeah. [ laughter ]
>> by the way, you learned everything you know from comedy, you learn in amsterdam >> seth: that's true. i have a real -- there's a dutch chord to everything i do. yes. [ laughter ] >> seth: yeah. >> yes. so you learned -- you mastered your skills. and you got back to the states, made the big bucks and became famous. >> seth: yeah. >> so you owe the dutch tax authorities a lot of money. >> seth: i have to pay taxes -- >> yes. >> seth: -- on my success? because -- do yes. >> seth: well, than't seem fair. >> they wanted me to give you this letter. [ laughter ] no, but i was -- yeah, so twas s bar. and it was happy hour. and it was a very crowded bar. so i was standing with my back against the bar. and there was this guy passing by from one side of the room to the other. and he was -- well, he recognized me when he was right here. so this is not a nice moment to get recognized. and he -- and maybe recognize this as well. and he said, "you are arjen lubach." and i'm like, "yeah, i kind of know that." you know? eles that happen to you as >> seth: yeah, they want to tell you a thing you've known your whole life. >> yes. >> seth: yeah. [ laughter ] >> as if you have forgotten your own name. they're paying you a service. i'm going to telriyou your name t now. so he said, "you are arjen lubach."
i said, "that's probably true." rid then what happened was he wanted to call hisds over. so he started shouting to the other side of the room. but it was very crowded happy hour bar. so they didn't hear him. sot that point, he looked around. he said, "i want my friend to know that arjen lubach is here so this is the most embarrassing thing that happened to me in a while. what he did was he stood right next to me. he spread his arms. herapped them around me, pressed me against him, lifted me up and carried me through the room to show me to his friends. [ laughter ] so that doesn't happen in new york? >> seth: no. >> so i'm happy. [ laughter ] >> seth: yeah, that's great. i will say, it happens in new york a lot of times for totally differenreasons. >> yeah, yeah, yeah. [ laughter ] >> seth: you've been in this building before though? re i have. yeah, i've been actually i've been here a couple times. the first time i was here i stually -- my former girlfriend, my e broke up with me on the roof of this building. [ laughter ] >> seth: really? >> that's absolutely true. >> seth: wow.
>> she -- we had a relationship. she's here, by the way. but she's my best friend now.'s and -- but s- we had a relationship. and she figured we're best friends. we're not lovers. we're best friends. >> seth: yeah. >> so we should go to new york and break up on top empire state building. >> seth: that's so romantic -- >> yes. >> seth: -- when you are just friends. >> yeah. so i said, "that's the weiinest i ever heard. let's go." so we went up to new york. but it was big line at empire state building. >> so et was -- >> yeah, a lot of people breaking up on the top of there. [ laughter ] >> two hours waiting.so said okay, "i'm fine flying halfway across the world to do this. but i'm not going to wait in line to break up with you." so then we went to t second best which the top of the rock at the rockefeller center. >> seth: yeah. >> so we went up here. she broke up with me. and it was the best thing we ever did. >> seth: that's great. and now, this is true. she works at your show, right? she's your showrunner. she's the showrunner, yeah. >> seth: that's great. i mean that is -- obviously, you guys made the right call on this one. >> yes, we did. we did. i have a new girlfriend. she's -- i want to say she's a lot better. [ laughter ] but she's also nice.
>> seth: i mean, thiis where it's problematic that they're both here. they were both -- no, i think you're handling this great. >> yeah. [ laughter ] >> seth: ihould point out -- i should point out that -- >> i have to go now. >> seth: -- this is- if you just said that in dutch and not english, it would have been exactly as bad. [ laughter ] >> okay. >> seth: i want to ask, you did a thing your show that was so good that pretty much every other country, at least in europe, that i know, st which is you -- obviously donald trump was talking about erica first. we mentioned it tonight on the show. you did a video called "netherlands second." >> yeah. >> seth: what was the idea behi this? >> well, it was a response to his remark, "america first." and we figured -- i mean, okay, we cannot change that. he's probably -- he's going to stick to that. so we said spot number two is probably open.ug [ er ] >> seth: yeah. >> yeah, so that's -- >> seth: yeah.pp [ cheers anduse ] >> so then clip called "netherlands second." and we made an introduction to our own country in a style that he would understand.h:
>> seah. >> 'cause it's -- and it's -- it was actually in his voice and his way of speaking. so we -- >> seth: yeah, we actually have a clip. >> yeah. >> seth: here's on "netherlands second." >> this is the absolute dike. g it'sat, great wall that we built to protect us from all the water from mexico. [ laughter ] we built an entire ocean, okay? an entire ocean between us and mexico. nobody builds oceans better than we do. [ eers and applause ] >> seth: fantastic. really well done. >> it was a fun thg. we have this singer in holland. he's like a cult figure. and he's called lee towers. and so we figured -- in the o vi say, "mr. trump, you have the trump towers. we have lee towers." and what happened afterwards, it's a year later or something, they built or rebuilt, this big buildings in rotterdam. two big towers. and i found out -- they said, "do you agree if we call the towers the lee towers?"
so i said, "well, i don't own the name.he but go." [ laughter ] so now because of our stupid video, there are two big in buildingotterdam called "the lee towers." it's such a -- [ laughter ] i >> setseemed like they should have called lee towers. is lee towers still with us? >> yeah. >> seth: okay, good. >> i hope so. >> seth: okay, great. >> i don't know what happened today. but i think so. >> seth: okay, good. [ laughter ] fingers crossed. we'll edit that out if he -- if something -- >> please do. >> seth: i want to say this. sincerely, i livin in amsterdam he late '90s. i went back a lo and there were a lot of failed attempts to do talk shows, late night talkhows. and you seemed to have cracked it which is a great credit to you. what do you think it is about your show that finally managed to make it work over there? >> well, i probably worked on all those you saw that didn't work. so that was a good learning -- >> seth: sure. >> -- period. and, yeah, we -- so -- i don't know, man. we just -- i don't know, man. [ laughter ] ust probably pulled some right strings. i don't know.
we are a weekly show. so that helped. 'cause in holland we don't have the 24 hour news cycle like you have around here. >> seth: sure. we got a lot going on. >> yeah, i was awake last night cause of all the jet lag. so, we can watch any channel, all night. there's always three people fu y makeup talking about t news. >> seth: yeah. we talk about it constantly. >> if you switch on the tv in holland, it's just like a clock. [ laughter ] really, it's true. that's not even a joke. >> seth: that's -- yeah, it's a great show. i used to watch "clock" all the time. >> yeah. [ laughter ] >> seth: hey, just for me because i lived there. and i love the country so much. you're about to go on a standup tour -- >> yeah. >> seth: -- in the netherlands. we usually have standups here that will lk about where you can see them, where their upcoming shows are. can you just list off, just so i can hear them one la time -- >> sure. >> seth: -- some cities you're going to. >> sure.ic maybe it'sfor the audience to come where i'm going to. [ speaking foreign language ]
[ laughter ] and yeah. [ speaking foreignage ] >> seth: thank you so much. arjen lubach, everyone.nd [ cheerspplause ] we'll be right back with antoni porowski. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ i'm all for my neighborhood. i'm all for backing the community that's made me who i am. i'm all for my theatre, my barbershop and my friends. because the community doesn't just have small businesses, it is small businesses. and that's why american express founded small business saturday. so, this year let's all get up, get out and shop small on november 24th. i got croissant. small business saturday. a small way to make a big difference. ♪ bum bum bum bum bum
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♪ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back to "late night." we're here with antoni porowski who you know as the food expert on netflix's emmy-winning "queer eye."uc thank you sofor being here. >> thank you for having me. >> seth: we appreciate it. [ cheers and applause ] so, this is something that's inspired by a dish you make at mmur restaurant. >> it's a double w because we want to talk about thanksgiving. but i also want to talk about my restaurant. >> seth: great, as you should. >> village den. >> seth: village den. we're all very thankful that you have reopened the village den.'s >> yeah, dinre kind of a lost art in new york city. and we wanted to create something that was, sort of, market driven, healthy, guilt g free eatat you could have a during the week. >> seth: which is very exciting. down in the west village. so, what is the it m we're going e here? >> so, we're actually going to start with a smoothie. >> seth: oh, wow.
>> i know you like cocktails. >> seth: yup. >> there's a towel. >> seth: okay, great. >> so when you get your hands messy while cookin h it's nice e something -- >> seth: all right, great. thank you. all right. >> so, this one isd "the big porowski," one of my favorite films, "the big lebowski." porowski, lebowski, you can figure it out. so this is a smoothie that actually has greek yogurt which is one of my favorite all time things. >> seth: you already lost your towel. >> i wore a leather jacket that's on me >> seth: oh, that's right. >> yeah. >> seth: that's right, yeah.ee >> so we have yogurt, almond milk, also really nice and high in protein. medjool dates, which are high in fiber. very good for a lot of things. after a lot of tngnksgiving ea >> seth: yup. >> don't why i said that. [ laughter ] so we have lime zest, bananas. you should peel them and freeze them. and they add a nice little cold touch. and you can add ice cubes if you want. then you put them in a blender. and then you have this littl thin >> seth: all right. fantastic. this is so much healthier than what i'm going to drink tomorrow. [ laughter ] >> right. and isn't the lime zest nice in there? >> seth: this is fantast. >> it's like eggnog. except there are no eggs. and it's nothing like eggnog. ert it's the same color. >> seth: it's wol. >> okay, so let's get started. so turkeys. >> seth: yeah. >> the problem -- i feel like we're starting an infomercial.
but the problewith turkeys is -- >> seth: hey, i've always had some problems with turkeys they're too dry. >> that's exactly what i'm going to talk about though. [ laughter ] >> seth: yeah, i've done a few infomercials.ur >> so,y meat tends to get a little dry after it's been out lecouple of days. so it's a quick lirick that you can use to rehydrate it which actually what we do at the restaurant with chicken to get it nice -- i'm sorry for a lack of a better word, but nice and moist. seth: yeah, that's all right. >> so what you're going to do now -- comfortable are you carving a turkey? you'reoing more than stirring for this. >> seth: i'm not comfortable at all. but i'm going to go for it.an >>stic. >> seth: okay, great. >> so you're actually going to go -- here, this is where the bone is. >> seth: yep. >> you're going to go straight down here and make an incision and get just a little piece of breast off. >> seth: okay, great. there we go.he >> a little toide. angle. >> seth: okay. >> there you go. >> seth: like that? okay. >> beautiful. >> seth: there you go. kiok at that. that is a good-l bird. >> oh, thank god. it's cooked! >> seth: it is cooked. >> beautiful. >> seth: okay. >> so you rip this off like so. >> seth: allowight. >> andou're going -- which is just taking apart the protein. >> seth: with my hands? >> with your hands. >> seth: oh, wow.
>> that's why we have the towels. >> seth: oh, that's great. >> see? it all makes sense. >> seth: so i'm just taking apart the protein? >> yeah. >> seth: okay. >> see you rip it apart into little shreds. >> seth: oh, i'm shredding it? okay, cool. >> yeah, you're shreit. >> seth: great, okay. this is going great. >> -- is just a pretentious french word for the exact same thing. >> seth: can you say it one re >> [ speaking a foreign language ] >> seth: [ speaking a foreign language ] >> close enough. >> seth: yeah. hespeaking a foreign language ] >> so when you get little pieces, you actually throw them in. oh, my gosh. >> seth: are we not going to ve the skin? >> the skin is nice. so you take -- [ laughter ] isn't it delicious? i >> sets really good. but i think i took too big a bite. and it wasn't going to break off. >> you got a fatty bite? you missed it? >> seth: uh-huh. >> so you throw the turkey. you throw the turkey. that was nice. throw it into hot broth. >> seth: okay. >> which rydrates it. >> seth: okay. >> there you go. >> seth: all right. can i just throw this in now? >> yeah. >> seth: okay, great. >> oh, those are very large, aggressive pieces. >> seth: yeah. >> i like that [ laughter ] i'm not -- that's a very large piece. >> seth: okay. >> so this is going to soften it up. >> seth: okay. >> you can put bay leaves in here. this is low sodium. we don't need too much salt. >> seth: you grew up in montreal? >> i'm from montreal. it's really nice thaok a really large bite. >> seth: now you have to talk? that's what i'm doing. i'm helping you out righounow by
askingbout your upbringing. [ laughter ] i want you to think about it. >> swalled it. >> seth: don't tell us about montreal until you really thought about it. >> so, i was born in montreal. i'm the first one of my family born outside of europe. my parents are polish. but i was raise in west virginia. >> seth: wow. >> yeah. ce seth: that is a weird triumvirate of p >> and now i've been in new york for eight years. >> seth: that's great. >> west virginia is very di erent. lovely, very green and natural. >> seth: all right, so we've rehydrated our turkey. >> we've rehydrated it. >> seth: okay. >> i'm actuallgoing to ask -- 're going to move this over here to the side. and so, now we're ready for assembly. >> seth: okay. nd so this is nice and wet moist and juicy and delicious. >> seth: okay, that's the second thme you used moist. i'm not okay wit. >> i know, i know, i know. [ laughter ] i'm sorry. >> seth: all right. >> okay, so, first things first, we have a bed. this is a thai chicken bowl. so this is a dnuh -- it's out er one hit at the den. >> seth: okay. >> it's a so, we put a bit of brown rice -- so, we actually cook in a lot of lemon grass and a bit coconut milk. >> seth: okay, great. >> a lite spoon of that. >> seth: next up. >> next up, cabbage. i'm a polish boy. we love our cabbag >> seth: all right. >> so you take a little spoon of that.
>> seth: okay, just get it in there. yup. >> so you braze it. >> seth: okay. >> and you add a bit of bay leaf. and you add apple cider at the -- apple cider vinegar at the end. >> seth: oka >> 'cause it makes it nice and acidic. otherwise it gets too bitter if you put it early on. >> seth: and now? >> and then finally, we take -- >> seth: oh, there we go. the peanut sauce. >> yeah. so coconut peanut sauce with some lime leaves. and we're actually going to mixu they in with it, in the bowl. >> seth: okay. this bowl? >> so now you're going to -- yes. >> seth: all right. >> so just toss that up together. >> seth: okay. looks good. throw it in here, right? >> may i? >> seth: yeah, please.e >> okay, so thu go. [ laughter ] so you mix it up. you were doing great. you really were. that is exactly what i was doing. [ laughter ] >> i'm like the opposite of a collaborative person in the kitchen. >> seth: oh, my god. >> i have to learn to be better. >> seth: oh, you really saved us.ht [ la ] can i put some peanuts on? >> so now -- yeah. these are crushed pethat have been toasted. >> seth: okay. >> so they're nice and golden brown with a bit of brown sugart >> all right. >> do you like cilantro? >> seth: nope. >> great. [ laughter ] glad we had this talk. >> seth: yeah. and now you can try it. >> seth: yes! 't it cute? >> seth: it's excellent.
[ cheers and applause ] >> and it's really good for you. >> seth: antoni porowski, everybody. we'll be right back. >> thank you! [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: so good. so a tree falls on your brand-new car and totals it. and as if that wasn't bad enough, now your insurance won't replace it outright because of depreciation. if your insurance won't replace your car, what good is it? you'd be better off just taking your money and throwing it right into the harbor. i'm regret that. with new car replacement, if your brand-new car gets totaled, liberty mutual will pay the entire value plus depreciation. liberty mutual insurance. ♪ liberty. liberty. liberty. liberty. ♪ ♪
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: my thanks to daniel radcliffe, arjen lubach. antoni porowski, everybody. fred armisen and the 8g band.or stay tunedcarson daly." we'll see you tomorrow. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ >> carson: hey folks, you've stumbled upon "last call" with yours truly, carson daly. thank you for that.