. >> jimmy: camila, i love you >> all right, okay >> jimmy: it's your turn to go >> alright >> jimmy: i think number -- number one, right? >> i think number one. >> number one. >> sure, yeah. >> all right, okay let's see. >> jimmy: let's see, ready >> i once lost, it's a dear friend, taylor swift's cat ♪ >> you once lost her cat >> jimmy: you lost her cat >> i lost her cat. >> jimmy: this is a big deal >> would you like to hear the story? >> jimmy: yes. >> yes >> so we were on tour together last year. i was opening for her -- >> yup >> on her "reputation" stadium tour and she basically -- she asked me to babysit her cat. her cat kinda had a weird, little stomach infection thing she was going to do a meet and greet. we were hanging out in the dressing room. i'm taking care of her cat somebody from my team asked me to do something. i leave the door open. the cat, meredith -- >> ah. >> sneaks out, is nowhere to be found. >> yep >> hours pass and no one can find the cat >> jimmy: yeah >> where are you >> and all of our -- >> what city >> it was -- oh, it was in vancouver, actually. >> j

[ cheers and applause ♪ ♪ >> jimmy: oh, john, we love you. >> i love you back, jimmy. >> jimmy: welcome back welcome back to the show >> hello to my friends >> jimmy: ah, the roots. >> the roots >> jimmy: congrats, we love you. it's got to feel good to be introduced like that >> it's a lot of pressure, jimmy. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what's happening >> do you see what i'm doing now? i'm wearing no shirts with my jackets. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you've really changed. >> no shirts with my vests >> jimmy: you've really changed. >> it's a wild time. >> jimmy: you're still the same guy, please. are your friends giving you a good ribbing about this? >> all the time. everywhere i go. >> jimmy: yeah >> it's weird. they just say, "hey, sexy" when i come up to them. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: but you have this, you have the egot, you have -- there is anything that you haven't accomplished that you want to accomplish now >> there's not much left you know, i campaign - [ laughter ] i campaigned hard for -- to make it on the instagram account of dilfs of disneyland have you seen that [ laughter ] >> jimm

[cheers and ♪ >> jimmy: how's it goin'? >> hey ya, jimmy! >> jimmy: what a great outfit that is. >> i went through my closet. so these reddish corduroys. >> jimmy: mm-hm. >> i have two pairs of the same. so every time i wear these cords, and then the next day, i go, did i wear the red ones or the tan ones? i get mixed up, and sometimes i wear red two days in a row, and i feel like telling people, but these are the two different ones. >> jimmy: i was dressed exactly like this when i came in this morning. i mean literally like this. >> really? >> jimmy: yes, and as i told you the other night, i saw you at a christmas party, i never know what to wear. and i was trying to get dressed, and i said, do you think adam's going to be at this party? and my wife said yeah, i think he'll be there, and i said oh, good, then i don't have to dress -- and she said no, just because he dresses like that doesn't mean you have to. >> i had the clothes. i had a nice lady and my wife went out and got me a bunch of stuff, but it's a little too small. and i'm in suc

. >> jimmy: was i nice >> no. >> jimmy: oh, come on. oh, my goodness. >> no, you were so nice. >> jimmy: okay, good pal, they just had the grammy nominations today. you've won eight grammys but -- >> i mean, six, but who's counting i'm counting, it's six [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: oh is it six? >> it's six, but, i mean, we can -- it's eight. >> jimmy: all right, sure -- yeah i keep saying eight, i'm so sorry. >> it's eight. >> jimmy: but what -- when you -- [ laughter ] when they first say your name, not the two silent ones, but the other ones, when they say your name or just even get nominated, what does it feel like >> absolute insanity you're just like, "wait, hold on --" >> jimmy: yeah >> "is this -- is this really happening? i mean, i went into "golden hour" being so excited that i, you know, kind of made something that felt different for me and i mean, i just got a kick out of the fact that it was nominated with these gigantic albums >> jimmy: yeah >> it's kind of an underdog in a lot of ways. >> jimmy: of course it was it was g

>> jimmy: keri keri, a number >> 8,072 >> jimmy: 8,072. all right, 8,072 >> don't judge me. don't judge me >> jimmy: jon, fictional place >> jon: fictional place? >> jimmy: yes. >> jon: narnia >> jimmy: yeah [ cheers ] >> jimmy: silly word >> googly. [ light laughter ] >> jon: googly >> googly. >> jimmy: combination of syllables you think no one has ever said before >> jon: "ffff" with a "p." [ laughter ] [ grinding noises with a "zh." >> jimmy: all right. [ grinding noises okay >> jon: and a "k" at the end >> jimmy: and a "k" at the end all right. [ light laughter ] keri, first and last name of your weirdest teacher. >> weirdest teacher. >> jon: calling them out >> i know. i'm just gonna say a teacher >> jimmy: okay, good >> jon: call them out. >> chuck yerger. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: no, like not chuck yeager >> yeager. >> jimmy: chuck yerger >> chuck yerger. you heard me >> jimmy: that's hilarious >> and that's what i live by >> jon: i think that's a series of syllables no one's ever used >> jimmy: chuck -- chuck yerger is an aweso

[cheers and applause] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, thank you very much. i appreciate that. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks for coming. thank you for joining us here in beautiful hollywood, california. where, i tell you something, anything can happen here. in fact, just this afternoon, outside on hollywood boulevard, a man dressed as cookie monster got busted by the cops. we had a cookie monster on the hood of a police car with his hands, you don't see that in minnesota, do you? this is the time when the best of the year lists start to pop up. "time" magazine today unveiled their person of the year, and that person is greta thunberg, the 16-year-old activist, the youngest woman, youngest human ever to be named person of the year, and to honor this young woman who's dedicated her life thus far to saving the environment, "time", will cut down 2 million trees to print the magazine. greta is a very worthy recipient of this honor. i have to hand it to our president. he has yet to throw a temper tantrum about this. he wasn't named, but he's on his best beh

same but, jimmy. i saw your monologue. >> jimmy: why are you laughing at that. >> i saw your monologue around billy, your son billy. >> jimmy: right. >> the whole country got set on fire about what are we going to do about children, the children's hospitals, resources. you see you're changing it this way, not this way, but this way. and we all have, and that's at anti-doets to all the chaos and craziness we see in washington. >> we're going to be fine when people get their confidence back. >> jimmy: well, i hope you can help us get the confidence back. >> i will. [ applause ] >> jimmy: john kasich! "it's up to us: 10 little ways we can bring about big change" is available now. and we'll return with music from white reaper. [cheers and applause] ♪ >> dicky: jimmy kimmel live concert series is presented by the 2020 gle, mercedes benz, the best or nothing. mike bloomberg's created on tover 400,000 jobs.ue leader. as president, an opportunity economy that works for us. tax fairness -- where the wealthy

>> jimmy: yes. i was waiting for you to mention that i'm in it. >> for a second. we cut most of it out. >> jimmy: i was limited to four seconds in the thing. but watch "3wrbrad paisley thin he's special" tomorrow night on abc. and brad will be sitting in with us all night. [ cheers and applause ] i wrote and illustrated a children's book. it's called "the serious goose." it comes out tomorrow. all the money i make from the book goes to children's hospital here in l.a. and children's hospitals across the united states. the book is dedicated to my little ones, jane and billy. i call my daughter goose. it's her nickname. the book was inspired by that. and when i got a copy last week, we set up some hidden cameras in my office and i read the book to them and now i will read it to you too. here it is. "the serious goose." >> hi, bill. hi, jane. what's this? what's the name of this book? >> good book. >> what's it called? >> jimmy kimmel. >> that's right. thank you, jane. are you excited? >> yeah. >> tell

>> jimmy: wait, wait, hold on. no >> okay. >> jimmy: wait, do i walk away >> no, no, no. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i'm always nervous - >> it's okay >> jimmy: yeah >> so i'm going to light it. it's going to take a couple seconds, and then you just want to grab that block and just fit it on top. >> jimmy: okay >> ready so here we go, i'm going to light it >> jimmy: oh, yeah you've done this before. >> ready to go >> jimmy: yeah >> okay, here we go. go ahead and put it on now stand back >> jimmy: whoa >> we're going to lower the lights [ audience aws ] >> jimmy: wow. [ cheers and applause >> so that magnesium is just pulling that oxygen out of the co2 and creating magnesium oxide. and that's what the smoke is >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. >> so it burns more energetically. it's kind of more unique >> jimmy: now are we allowed to breathe in magnesium oxide >> uh -- we're fine. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: okay, all right. thank you, kevin [ laughter ] it's a big room. there's not too much of it >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. this is awesome.

> jimmy: is this annie? who took this? >> annie leibovitz took the photo. >> jimmy: annie, come on >> and it was -- it's just -- it was a remarkable day. it reminded me that anything is possible a girl like me from nebraska can have anything you want as long as you fight for it and you believe in yourself. that's the biggest thing >> jimmy: you can be on the cover of "vogue. >> you can be on the cover of "vogue." >> jimmy: how fun is that? [ cheers and applause this is gorgeous it's perfect >> and it's my semi-solo cover >> jimmy: yeah, that's what i'm saying exactly >> semi-solo >> jimmy: exactly. yeah, yeah you're sharing the cover, yeah >> yeah. >> jimmy: with somebody. i want to talk about your podcast, "pretty big deal. this is season two>>es >> jimmy: it's fantastic if you go any -- wherever you get your podcasts from, look for "pretty big deal" and check it out it's good. >> thank you >> jimmy: i love your -- >> sorry, i just have to adjust because, sorry, his head is -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yes, he

. >> jimmy: camila, i love you >> alright, okay >> jimmy: it's your turn to go >> alright >> jimmy: i think number -- number one, right? >> i think number one. >> number one. >> sure, yeah. >> alright, okay let's see. >> jimmy: let's see, ready >> i once lost, it's a dear friend, taylor swift's cat ♪ >> you once lost her cat >> jimmy: you lost her cat >> i lost the cat. >> jimmy: this is a big deal >> would you like to hear the story? >> jimmy: yes. >> yes >> so we were on tour together last year. i was opening for her -- >> yup >> on her reputation stadium tour and she basically -- she asked me to babysit her cat. her cat kinda had a weird, little stomach infection thing she was going to do a meet and greet. we were hanging out in the dressing room. i'm taking care of her cat somebody from my team asked me to do something. i leave the door open. the cat, meredith -- >> ah. >> sneaks out, is nowhere to be found. >> yup >> hours pass and no one can find the cat >> jimmy: yeah >> where are you >> and all of our -- >> what city >> it was -- oh, it was in vancouver, actually. >> jimmy:

daisy, welcome back. >> thank you >> jimmy: you look gorgeous. >> jimmy: thanks, jimmy. >> jimmy: so how you doing everything good? >> i'm good, thank you yeah >> jimmy: this is a big deal i mean this is the - >> yeah. >> jimmy: this is the final "star wars." >> yeah. >> jimmy: it's a big deal. >> it is a big deal. >> jimmy: and how long have you been part of this? five years >> five years. >> jimmy: do you remember first getting this and, like, were you allowed to tell friends you got the part? >> no. i told my mom, dad, and sister and then i couldn't tell anyone else but i was going to quite an expensive gym. and i was a bartender. so everyone was like, "why are you going to an expensive gym? i was like, "oh, no reason." [ laughter ] so i didn't -- people knew something was going on >> jimmy: they knew something was happening. >> yeah. >> jimmy: "wait, you don't have the money to go to this gym. >> yeah. >> jimmy: and you're like, "yeah, i might though one day. >> yeah, yeah, yeah. yeah >> jimmy: i have to ask you a question i think it's on everyone's mind baby yoda. >> oh, yeah. [

okay >> jimmy: thank you very much. >> alright, thank you. >> jimmy: here we go yeah [ beeping jimmy: the 2010's. 2010's >> oh, they're ending. >> jimmy: they are the decade is over >> ooh [ audience oohs >> jimmy: that's right >> well, what a decade [ laughter ] here's how i'd sum up the 2010s. i was going through the airport, and there was a guy, and he was traveling and there was a woman from tsa and they were screaming at each other. and she said, "i wouldn't disrespect you if you hadn't disrespected me in the first place. and that is the 2010s. [ laughter ] is we're trying to figure out who disrespected who in the first place, and we're both screaming at each other and everyone's just trying to get on their southwest flight. >> jimmy: that's fantastic [ bell dings ] [ cheers and applause ] that is john mulaney right there. that was all the time for "wheel of opinions." my thanks again to john mulaney we'll be right back with karlie kloss [ cheers and applause well put ♪ (man) you take care of yourself. (elderly woman) oh, thank you so much. (elderly man 1) i'll be alright. (man

jimmy: no. >> you should say it, that's what you said! >> jimmy: okay, so you've been working, i know, for a very long time on this movie. >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: very, very long time. how long has it been that you've been working on it? >> a couple years. >> jimmy: a couple years. all the time. you can't leave your house. all that -- >> i left the house for, like, ten months. i was in london. >> jimmy: when you finish and you're not with these people every day, for instance, daisy you did two movies with, did jj give you a gift, a parting present, anything to commemorate your time together? >> he did. >> jimmy: he did. >> and it's a touch obscure. >> jimmy: okay. >> jj said, i can't give you your gift now. because it's taking a while to make. and i was like what is this thing? so a box arrives at my house. i'm like throwing out -- my friend was over. so she was experiencing this with me. i was throwing all the things out. so, there's a show called "the great british bakeoff." >> jimmy: oh, yea

wait ♪ >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. it's eight-year-old me - [ laughter ] sent from the past did you come to remind me why i got into the business in the first place? >> and that you should always fight to fulfill your dreams >> and that second chances are always possible no matter what you may or may not have done inside of a bucket [ laughter ] >> no. i'm the president of the network's kid. my dad's busy green lighting "minions 8." but he wanted me to tell you - ♪ you're out of the busines time to leave hollywoo i get to host now ♪ ♪ my dad said i could he is our host now his dad said he could ♪ ♪ bring me some water and some candy and snack and don't change ♪ ♪ the channel because we will be right back ♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: we'll be right back, everybody! i'm not out of the business! this is the business [ cheers and applause ♪ ♪ oh, ho! oh, ho, ho, ho! you... you got me. uh, what do you want? i've got uh, ai robots, i've got vr goggles. i want your sled, please. no. [ chuckles ] timmy

, jimmy >> jimmy: what's up, dude? >> tariq: are you okay, man? >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, i'm good did you see the debate last night? [ laughter ] >> tariq: yeah, of course. i mean i'm super excited for the democratic primaries because we'll probably know who the nominee is by may, and then just five more months of debates and, attack ads and conventions. ♪ [ laughter ] >> guys, guys. are you okay >> jimmy: yeah, sure >> tariq: good, absolutely >> good, because what's cool is that once the election is over, then we get to start thinking about who should be president in 2024. ♪ [ laughter ] [ laughter ] >> jimmy: hey james, james, can you stop playing that? it's making everything weird [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause come on, man [ laughter ] well, today was day five of the impeachment hearings and we heard testimony from foreign policy experts david holmes and fiona hill. fiona said that her boss, john bolton thought rudy giuliani's actions would come back to haunt us. i'm sorry. but does rudy giuliani really look l

don't judge me >> jimmy: jon, fictional place >> fictional place >> jimmy: yes. >> narnia. >> jimmy: yeah [ cheers ] >> jimmy: silly word >> googly. [ light laughter ] >> googly? >> googly. >> jimmy: combination of syllables you think no one has ever said before >> "ffff" with a "p. [ laughter ] [ grinding noises >> with a "zh. >> jimmy: all right. [ grinding noises okay >> and a "k" at the end. >> jimmy: and a "k" at the end all right. [ light laughter ] keri, first and last name of your weirdest teacher. >> weirdest teacher. >> calling them out. >> i know. i'm just gonna say a teacher >> jimmy: okay, good >> call them out >> chuck yerger. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: no, like not chuck yeager >> yeager. >> jimmy: chuck yerger >> chuck yerger. you heard me >> jimmy: that's hilarious >> and that's what i live by >> i think that's a series of syllables no one's ever used >> jimmy: chuck -- chuck yerger is an awesome name [ light laughter ] >> yeah. >> jimmy: jon, amount of time. >> amount of time? 14 nanoseconds [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: scariest insect you'd see at a zoo >> scarie

>> jimmy: no way >> yeah. >> jimmy: so from back in the day? >> yes >> jimmy: every single one >> yeah, every single one. >> jimmy: really >> my 16th birthday, i was waiting in line for "empire strikes back." like, it's big >> wow >> yeah. [ laughter ] >> now, by contrast -- >> don't ask him >> by contrast, don't hate me. >> no. >> i've never seen one >> jimmy: you're kidding me? >> wow [ laughter ] wow. like i said i killed a puppy [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that is so paul reiser of you >> i'd like to apologize to america. >> i understand they're very good >> jimmy: you're kidding me, paul >> i've seen little pieces exactly -- >> i've seen little pieces >> jimmy: this is the answer >> i've seen pieces. it looks fabulous. >> we don't need that. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it looks fabulous. >> adam driver - >> jimmy: this is so - >> does not need you to see a piece of it. >> adam driver doesn't need me at all >> no. >> jimmy: this is so paul reiser. >> well, let me tell you something. here's the reason. >> oh, yeah. yes? [ light laughter ] >> it couldn

>> yes, jimmy. >> jimmy: have your shopping done? >> halfway. >> jimmy: who do you have to buy for? >> my wife and my son. >> jimmy: okay. that's your whole family, right? >> yeah. >> jimmy: we're going to work on it after the show. >> my mom, my grandma, my cousin. >> jimmy: what does benji, your son, want? >> new ipad. >> jimmy: are you going to get that for him? >> yes, of course. >> jimmy: okay, all right. will your mother-in-law be coming over for christmas? >> unfortunately, yes. >> jimmy: the holidays can be a stressful time when family visits. especially with this election coming. but help and dare i even say escape is on the way. >> the holiday season. the most wonderful time of the year. also the most stressful. >> you're putting kids in -- >> bleeding heart, wah! >> we need to talk this out. >> family gatherings can be bring out the worst. >> are you done? can i bring you another? >> shut up! >> when you start to feel overwhelmed, don't reach for the liquor cabinet. head for the tree fort. the first christmas tree with a secret room. climb in and enjoy a place to hide. ga

> jimmy: yeah >> he's a cutie -- cutie pie >> jimmy: he's a cutie pie >> yeah. >> jimmy: how did he -- how did he do it >> that's private. i want to go >> jimmy: no, jenny, no. it's a talk show so come on. >> i don't want to do it >> jimmy: jenny. >> well -- okay. [ laughter ] no, i really want to do it so we were in france, which is a very romantic country. >> jimmy: stop right there >> yeah, because they invented french kissing [ laughter ] that's the tongue. they love it >> jimmy: oh, my god >> yeah, french kissing. >> jimmy: yeah >> so, we were in france >> jimmy: it's very romantic place, yes >> yeah, just tonguing it down >> jimmy: no >> sorry [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's not what i meant. not what i meant >> i'm making myself blush weirdly. this is really weird [ laughter ] okay so we were in france, and as it happens when you're in france, we came upon an abandoned castle [ laughter ] this happened to me. this is not a lie. >> jimmy: this only happens to people like you. >> yes, totally, that's right. [ laughter ] so, yeah so we get to the castle, and it's like, "oh, it's loc

>> hey >> jimmy: they love you. alright, alright, tiffany, here's how -- here's how we're going to do this we're each going to take a turn telling a story to our audience about one topic. and tonight's topic is the holidays >> okay. >> jimmy: okay so since you're my guest, i'm going to give you the honor of watching me go first [ laughter ] >> hi guys, i'm going to let y'all look at me from the back [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: alright, the holidays i'm trying to think -- okay, story about the holidaysassi story that happened to me i went home. ew yk, saugerties, new york so i was on "saturday night live" and i'd go visit my parents all the time and when i went, i just like to stay home. i didn't really like -- my mom was always like, "let's go for dinner let's go to restaurants. let's go out for dinner. i go, "i don't want to go out for dinner." because i came home. i want a home cooked meal. and i just don't want -- want to do anything so she goes, "let's just go out. she liked to show me off becau

>> jimmy: yeah, right? [ laughter ] it's like, "dude, that so epic." [ laughter ] >> just throw that in the mix real quick 'cause you know how much work that is. >> jimmy: work goes into it. >> oh, my god. >> jimmy: i just you also -- i mean, every time we do any little bit on the show, you put the work in, buddy >> thank you >> jimmy: i know the halftime show is a little -- you have a a little time for that, but i know you >> it's really not because we christmas and then, you know, you're back in january. >> jimmy: it's right after that so it's gonna -- it's gonna be -- it's gonna happen quickly, i feel like >> jimmy: it's you and shakira >> yes, me and shakira >> jimmy: i love that. >> down in miami [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: i love shakira >> yeah. she's amazing, and it's down in miami, and we're gonna bring that flavor. >> jimmy: it's a big deal, man [ cheers ] >> yeah, it's gonna be good. >> jimmy: it is a big deal >> yeah. >> jimmy: i'm assuming you that you're rehearsing already or thought about

and now, get ready, jimmy kimmel! ♪ [cheers and applause] >> jimmy: thank you. very nice. hi, i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thanks for watching. thanks for coming. listen, i don't know about you, but we, at my house, we deep in the holiday spirit. the elf has been moving from shelf to shelf. the tree is decorated. the kids are excited. last night i got home from work last night, and my wife whose name is molly, brain freeze. anyway, molly's sitting down with our daughter jane, who's 5, to write a letter to santa claus, which jane did not want to do. she wanted us to refer santa to our amazon wish list that i'd made. but we insisted on a letter because we want to have it. so my wife got a pen and paper and asked jane why should santa bring you presents, and jane thought about it, and she said because i want them, that's why. d we're like, no. what good things have you done to deserve presents. you have to tell santa. and she says i don't know. so i start giving examples, do you listen to your parents, are you nice to your brother? do you share your toys? and she thin

. >> jimmy: what's your name >> alex. >> jimmy: alex, where are you from >> florida >> jimmy: hey, alex from florida. >> oh, my gosh [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i'm so happy you're here >> thank you me too >> jimmy: thanks for coming to the show first time to the show >> second. >> jimmy: oh, really >> yeah. >> jimmy: who did you see last time >> i can't even talk right now i don't remember >> jimmy: okay, good [ laughter ] i'm happy you're back. i know florida - >> millie bobby brown was here i remember that. >> jimmy: gets a little chilly we love her. >> yes >> jimmy: it gets a little chilly in florida sometimes at night time, right? [ light laughter ] >> no. >> jimmy: not really no. but, yeah. but maybe if you're indoors and the air conditioning is cranked up >> a little bit. >> jimmy: yeah you're going to need a good sweater. >> yeah. >> jimmy: i got one for you. >> thank you [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: you got to try this one on ♪ are you in there >> yes >> jimmy: all right, are you in there? oh oh, my gosh. oh, this is unbelievable look at this oh, my gosh. oh, yeah look at that

jimmy: i'm sorry to tell you this >> dude, jimmy, she had the whole package. >> jimmy: well, yeah what >> her father is jamaican. her mother is indian she managed to do the one thing every indian dude wishes they could do be black [ laughter ] she did it she nailed it. >> jimmy: yeah no, she dropped out. [ laughter ] >> oh, my god. you guys >> jimmy: yeah, sorry hasan. oh, my gosh. you're getting yourself in so much trouble on camera >> i got so much swag and everything >> jimmy: you got swag [ laughter ] well, you had andrew yang on your show. >> he's not black. you know that. [ laughter ] l >> jimmy: yeah no, no, but what i'm saying -- no, he's asian >> he -- yeah, but we went to chinatown last week for the show and we just wanted to see how young millennial voters, you know interacted with andrew yang. >> jimmy: all right. we have a clip everyone take a look at this clip here. hasan minhaj and andrew yang >> do you know who he is >> no. ea i know who that is. [ laughter ] >> would you be interested in the nation's first asian-american president >> [ bleep ] hell yeah hell yeah. i'm

and now, stand still, jimmy kimmel. >> jimmy: thank you for joining us. as, well, very nice. as the holidays are approaching, the big one is coming. christmas is coming. christmas is the mother all holidays. it really kind of got started this morning at my house. because the elf on the shelf is back in our home. the elf somehow got out of the box. we stuffed him in the closet, and he got out and onto the tree. it's good to have the rat back. you tell the kids not to at t at and then you have this elf, whose job is to tell the parents everything they do. my daughter is determined to impress the elf. today she brushed her teeth in the living room in front of him. look at what i'm doin'. and my son bill ey calls santa ho-ho. yesterday was selfish monday or cyber monday. i went a little nuts, i woke up this morning with a dozen amazon echoes in my bed. there's one still in me, i think. do you think president trump buys presents for anyone in his life? not a chance, right? you can't buy things on twitter. the president now is in london, mixing it up with fellow world leaders at th

>> jimmy: yes. i was waiting for you to mention that i'm in it. >> for a second. we cut most of it out. >> jimmy: i was limited to four seconds in the thing. but watch "brad paisley thinks he's special" tomorrow night on abc. and brad will be sitting in with us all night. [ cheers and applause ] i wrote and illustrated a children's book. it's called "the serious goose." it comes out tomorrow. all the money i make from the book goes to children's hospital here in l.a. and children's hospitals across the united states. the book is dedicated to my little ones, jane and billy. i call my daughter goose. it's her nickname. the book was inspired by that. and when i got a copy last week, we set up some hidden cameras in my office and i read the book to them and now i will read it to you too. here it is. "the serious goose." >> hi, bill. hi, jane. what's this? what's the name of this book? >> good book. >> what's it called? >> jimmy kimmel. >> that's right. thank you, jane. are you excited? >> yeah. >> tell

>> jimmy: sure. so you want me to just -- so i'll just introduce you as if -- okay. all right. all right. well, listen, it was so good. why not do it again? i hope jack survives this one. "jumanji: the next level" opens in theaters friday. please say hello to jack black, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] wow. are you all right? >> i'm okay. that's just the first time i've ever fallen. [ laughter ] but i'm okay. i'm just happy to be here. and i want to thank the academy. i'm going to put my things over there. anyways, thank you. >> jimmy: we might have our first on-air death. are you okay? >> i've never gotten this much cardio at the top of a show. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: all right. well, this is great. it's great you have to -- >> i'm going to unbutton one just to let out the steam. shhh. >> jimmy: by the way, speaking of entrances, i want to say i know you turned 50 a couple of months ago. >> i did. [ applause ] >> jimmy: you had a big party at largo. >> well, not really.

show starring jimmy fallon." and now, here he is, jimmy fallon [ cheers and applause ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: hello. nice to see you. hi thank you very much. hello, everybody welcome. [ cheers and applause thank you, please have a seat. welcome everybody. welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome to "the tonight show." thank you for being here thank you for watching [ cheers and applause we've got a fun show tonight well guys, the new cast of the upcoming season of "the bachelor" has just been revealed and rules are a little different this season. first, all 30 women have to make it through a house vote then, if approved, they're going to face a trial in the senate [ laughter and applause that's right, there's 30 women on "the bachelor" all fighting for the same thing, to see who can disappoint their parents the most [ laughter ] but this year is very fun, since this year's bachelor is pete the pilot, three of the contestants are actually flight attendants [ audience ohs ] which should explain wh

>> yes >> jimmy: oh, my god >> i know. >> jimmy: come on. that is fantastic. >> it's so fun [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: congrats on everything >> thank you >> jimmy: break a leg on this play "jagged little pill. i want everyone to go see this play right now it's over at -- this is at the broadhurst theatre and in fact, just to help everyone go see this, alanis was very nice enough evneence is getting tickets to go see "jagged little pill. ♪ [ cheers and applause alanis morissette, everybody "jagged little pill" opens tomorrow on broadway at the broadhurst theatre did i get it alanis is performing her new song for us, after the break stick around, everybody. we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ♪ you know when you're at ross and you realize it's time stop stealing mine... never. holiday gifts everyone's sure to love at 20 to 60 percent off department store prices. at ross. yes for less. shouldn't mean a change in standards. that's why - thanks to you - we're rated number one in customer satisfaction by j.d. power. and you realiz

. >> jimmy: okay. good, good. >> and not because, you know, i had korean barbecue the night before, and it was very rich, and so i, i fell asleep, and i woke up, and i saw like a fleur efleury of messages as i was waking up as if someone died. >> jimmy: you'd forgotten what was happening? >> yeah, i didn't, i wasn't reminded that they had come out that day. >> jimmy: i see. >> yeah, so it was that. and yeah, but -- >> jimmy: that would be weird if somebody did remind you, because then it puts a lot of pressure on being nominated. someone's like, by the way, nominations in the morning, and then it's like, what if they don't happen, then that person's a jerk. >> yeah, sure. the nominations in general, like the wrong date, never mind. >> jimmy: you know what i'm saying. it's all this korean barbecue. that knocks you out, huh? >> knocked me out, yeah. it was really great, though. >> jimmy: you brought something that i, tickled me great lay. your family was very excited. >> yes, they were. >> jimmy: they st

. >> what happened to jimmy hoffa. >> jimmy hoffa disappeared. >> jimmy hoffa is missing. in their part of the jimmy hoffa investigation they have hit a dead end. >> it was the beginning of the greatest mystery in american history. a hot july afternoon nearly 92 degrees when the teamster's boss james riddle hoffa simply vanished. july 30, 1975 hoffa was last seen in this parking lot of the machumachus red fox just outside detroit. he's thought to be on his way to a mob meeting with tony provenzano. a bitter enemy. they were supposed to settle a feud involving money. but instead, hoffa was never seen again. 26 years later a phone call would put me right in the middle of the hoffa search. today authorities from the oakland county prosecutor's office went into this house and took up the floor boards. and now that quest for answers has brought me back again. eric: i'm eric shawn. for much of my career i investigated the mafia. but this story has been one that's especially haunted me for almost two decades. the disappearance of jimmy hoffa and the death bed confession of frank

[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you very much. hi, everyone. thank you. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks for coming, for answering my evite. please relax. we have so much to get to. starting with an unusual happening in washington. that for a change had nothing to do with the president. this is from the redskins-lions game yesterday. the redski qckne haskins, got his first nfl win. but missed the final play of the game because he was taking a selfie with a fan. [ laughter ] they had to put in the backup quarterback for the final snap. and of course people were very upset about this. former redskins quarterback joe theismann wrote, "how do you miss the last snap of a game because you're taking selfies? that's unprofessional and wrong." unprofessional and wrong. both of those things. [ laughter ] the guy's 22 years old. he heard it was time for the snap. he probably thought they meant snapchat and he went -- [ laughter ] elsewhere in washington it was a busy few days for our dear misleader. on friday trump placed a call to fox & frie

red. >> jimmy: red. yeah. >> and we also do carpentry. >> jimmy: and this is a book that is a true story presumably. >> yes. yeah. >> jimmy: i would imagine you get every single mafia-related book sent to you. >> over the past number of years there have been a few that have been circling about and that sort of thing. but this was interesting because eric roth gave it to bob de niro and de niro and i have been trying to make a picture again since "casino." that was 1995. so it was a long time since we had worked together. and we tried to find all these other projects, remakes of "the bad and the beautiful," remember the story about hollywood with kirk douglas, all that sort of thing. and finally it came down to a situation where we decided that we're going to make a film about an aging hit man supposedly. we were working on this one project. but it was kind of a genre piece and i don't know how to do genre anymore and the genre that i know goes back to 1948. it doesn't pay. so the -- eric gave him this bo

and now, for what it's worth, jimmy kimmel! [cheers and applause] ♪ >> jimmy: very nice. welcome. hi, i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks for coming. please relax. i'm coming on yet another day of political wrangling in congress. it was a long day, we'll get to that, but first, you'll be happy to know the president is back home to the white house after a doozy of a trip to the uk. he was in london for the nato summit and it didn't end on a happy note. trump cut the trip short after seeing a video of world leaders seemed to be talking about him behind his back. this is captured at buckingham palace last night. watch here as canadian prime minister justin trudeau, boris johnson and french president emmanuel macron gathered together to goof on his majesty. and now the bombing of canada begins. this is absolutely unacceptable. [cheers and applause] how, how dare they laugh at our ridiculous president. that is our job! after the video, trump called trudeau two-faced. and trudeau is one thing, but boris johnson, that's one that's got to hurt most. we alre

[cheers and applause] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, thank you very much. i appreciate that. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks for coming. thank you for joining us here in beautiful hollywood, california. where, i tell you something, anything can happen here. in fact, just this afternoon, outside on hollywood boulevard, a man dressed as cookie monster got busted by the cops. we had a cookie monster on the hood of a police car with his hands, you don't see that in minnesota, do you? this is the time when the best of the year lists start to pop up. "time" magazine today unveiled their person of the year, and that person is greta thunberg, the 16-year-old activist, the youngest woman, youngest human ever to be named person of the year, and to honor this young woman who's dedicated her life thus far to saving the environment, "time", will cut down 2 million trees to print the magazine. i have to hand it to our president. he has yet to throw a temper tantrum about this. he wasn't named, but he's on his best behavior, unfortunately, his namesake, donnie jr. w

>> jimmy: sure. so you want me to just -- so i'll just introduce you as if -- okay. all right. all right. well, listen, it was so good. why not do it again? i hope jack survives this one. "jumanji: the next level" opens in theaters friday. please say hello to jack black, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] are you all right? >> i'm okay. that's just the first time i've ever fallen. [ laughter ] but i'm okay. i'm just happy to be here. and i want to thank the academy. i'm going to put my things over there. anyways, thank you. >> jimmy: we might have our first on-air death. are you okay? >> i've never gotten this much cardio at the top of a show. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: all right. well, this is great. it's great you have to -- >> i'm going to unbutton one just to let out the steam. shhh. >> jimmy: by the way, speaking of entrances, i want to say i know you turned 50 a couple of months ago. >> i did. [ applause ] >> jimmy: you had a big party at largo. >> well, not really. i do

and now look out, jimmy kimmel! >> jimmy: hello, i'm jimmy, thank you for coming, i thank you for joining us on what was a, a feisty and festive day in washington, d.c. we'll start with the festive. the president and first lady took part in a thing, the lighting of the national christmas tree. the it hearkens back to the days when we had three channels on tv and nothing better to watch than lights going on. >> it's an honor to be with everyone tonight and all across our land. melania and i would like to wish you a very, very merry christmas. and now the first lady will do the honors of lighting the national christmas tree. so we'll count from five down to that very special number. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: which very special number, one? all right, let's see if we request make can make it all the way down to one. >> five, four, three, two, one. [cheers and applause] >> jimmy: oh, isn't that great? look at that. perfect. and melania's dressed just like the gifts they wrapped, too. then they went on with music and perfor

jimmy: no. dante: no. lemonis: i'm a big believer that, in business, consumers will rally around a cause or a story or some personal connection they have. people like to do business with people. it's okay that you amplify who you are. that's how i make a connection with you. you've really been a mother and a father for... jimmy: for 19 years now. ♪ lemonis: you have the financials that we can look at? jimmy: yeah, yeah. lemonis: wanna go get them? jimmy: yeah, sure. lemonis: are these the books? dante: yeah. keep track of how much cash, how much was on credit cards. lemonis: this does not look like a financial statement. this looks like a bookie... jimmy: yeah, i understand what you're saying, yeah. lemonis: like, this is how a bookie keeps numbers. jimmy: we don't have it printed out. lemonis: so how much did it do last year in revenue? dante: uh, about, like, 460 -- lemonis: no, no. i don't want an "about." i want the exact number. dante: um... lemonis: can you guys add it up? jimmy: he's just busting

you know >> jimmy: yeah >> so -- >> jimmy: "this car can do everything." >> yeah. >> jimmy: "let's see how fast --" >> yeah. >> jimmy: "we can get this baby to go, man i got a meryl streep, yeah." >> yeah. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it's like, "i got a maserati." >> yeah. >> jimmy: "i got -- i'm driving a meryl streep, dude get out of the way." >> "we got a bunch of gears. >> jimmy: i mean, it was unbelievable it's great and i love the comradery 'cause i saw timothee chalamet -- >> yeah. >> jimmy: posted this photo. >> yes >> jimmy: it just made me laugh. it's everyone in period costume eating wendy's french fries. >> that's right. [ laughter ] that's right [ applause ] >> jimmy: do you remember this day? >> yeah. [ applause ] we had -- we had this full, like -- it was all these carriages and all these people and everyone's in the -- then meryl's in the carriage. and she says, "i would like some french fries. and then timmy is like "meryl wants fries! and then everybody ran to go get her fries and came back. and then also off-screen here there's a -- she also had -- there was this poodle n

jimmy: yes. lemonis: okay. all right. jimmy: i appreciate everything. i appreciate everything you're doing, man. ♪ lemonis: i'm on my way back, and i'm really excited to see what kind of progress they've made in the week since i've been gone. this is painted. this looks good. i'm impressed with what i'm seeing so far. the outside is really coming together. ♪ it looks different. dante: yeah. lemonis: it looks good. it looks lighter and brighter. joe: big difference, right? lemonis: did you guys redo this? joe: yeah. lemonis: this lip is gonna be a problem. you're not gonna be able to sit here, and you can see it from the side. if i want to pull up my seat, i've got nowhere to go with my legs. dante: okay. lemonis: so we need a new bar put in, a new counter. oh, my gosh. i didn't expect to walk in to this. not as much progress that i had hoped. and it looks a little haphazard. the outside looks infinitely better. how do you feel about it? dante: i feel awesome about it. lemonis: but what's happened in here besides nothing? dante: well, today the equip

. >> what happened to jimmy hoffa. >> jimmy hoffa disappeared. >> jimmy hoffa is missing. in their part of the jimmy hoffa investigation they have hit a dead end. >> it was the beginning of the greatest mystery in american history. a hot july afternoon nearly 92 degrees when the teamster's boss james riddle hoffa simply vanished. july 30, 1975 hoffa was last seen in this parking lot of the machumachus red fox just outside detroit. he's thought to be on his way to a mob meeting with tony provenzano. a bitter enemy. they were supposed to settle a feud involving money. but instead, hoffa was never seen again. 26 years later a phone call would put me right in the middle of the hoffa search. today authorities from the oakland county prosecutor's office went into this house and took up the floor boards. and now that quest for answers has brought me back again. eric: i'm eric shawn. for much of my career i investigated the mafia. but this story has been one that's especially haunted me for almost two decades. the disappearance of jimmy hoffa and the death bed confession of frank

it was just jimmy's word. so to be sure, the prosecutor made him take a lie detector test and jimmy passed with flying colors. >> he was telling us the truth, so bottom line is we had further information that larry was responsible for tricia. >> a grateful beaumont decided to reward him with full credit for his brave undercover work, releasing him from prison, and scrubbing his criminal record clean. >> from his perspective, he expected to get nothing. from my perspective, of course, he spent time in the looney bin with this guy, going through this whole process. >> for 15 years, jimmy had been the only one to see those falcons that hall said watched over the dead. >> problem is we never got them, they disappeared, we don't know what happened to them. >> you've never seen the falcons? >> no. >> show you a picture. that's one of the falcons. >> "dateline" took pictures of a falcon when we met larry hall's twin brother. he said larry carved the falcon in the wood shop at the springfield prison, then mailed it to

welcome back to jimmy kimmel live. i'm not jimmy kimmel. i'm brie larson. you know our next guest from season five of "90 day fiancÉ." now you can watch her on "90 day fiance: pillow talk." it airs sundays on tlc. please welcome molly hopkins. [cheers and ♪ >> brie: oh, molly, you're incredible, incredible, thank you for being here, i am obsessed with the show. i am obsessed with you. so you're on the show "90 day fiance", for people who haven't watched it, can you explain it briefly. >> yes, i'm so excited. let me catch my breath. "90 day fiance" is a reality show about people who fall in love with someone from another country. when they land they have 90 day the to wed. >> brie: interesting. so it's a pretty quick process. so you were on the show with your, with your now ex-husband luis. >> i was. >> brie: how did you end up on the show? >> so, my besty, not like the resty girl. they sign you up for everything was like binge watching the show, and i had met dominican republic. and she call please and says, don't kill me, and she's like, i'm on this sho

and now, please hold on, jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you very much. welcome. hi. i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thanks for watching. thanks for coming. thanks for everything really. [ cheers and applause ] that's very nice. i appreciate it. hope you had a good weekend. i had a good weekend. we did a lot of stuff this weekend. but i have to say, even though i was having a perfectly good time this weekend at one point i wished i could come in to work and go straight onto the air because donald trump -- you know that guy? okay.

jimmy g. through for 129 yards and four touch downs much to the delight of his head coach. >> no matter what good thing or bad thing happens to him, he learns from it, files it in the bank and goes to the next week. >> i wouldn't call it a groove. i think we're in a good spot as a team. control our own destiny. >> baseball news, the angels didn't get garret cole, the star pitcher. the consolation prize is pretty good. anthony rendone who signs a 7-year $245 million deal. we did the math that's is $35 million a year. red the nationals in the world series crown, and now rendone is now the third aingeual a contract over $200 million. that's the first time in major league baseball you have one team with three guys of over $200 million in total value. >> i'm trying to break down that $35 million. >> it's >>> that's our report. we appreciate your time >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight kevin hart, from "uncut gems", julia fox, and music from finneas. and now, furthermore, ji

but there was a particular speights spite and dislike of the revolutionaries from jimmy carter. he took it from both sides. the revolutionaries disliked him and as our caller said, the opposition, the pro-shah iranians disliked him. >> only some of the hostages met with jimmy carter. why did 20 decide not to meet with him? >> this is new to me. i was in such a state i was not counting who was there and who was not there. and i knew he had sacrificed his presidency for us and i was not about to show disrespect at that point. there were others who disagree, she disagreed, who resented it. of our 52 people i love them all very dearly, but there are great political differences. >> our guest is john limbert, one of the hostages taken for 444 days. we are looking back at 40 years ago. and stuart eizenstat, who had a front row seat to all of this as president jimmy carter's yeah >> there is a lever question advisor. and about whether there was a republican led october surprise. there is a book about this. he alleged there was a secret deal that was arranged, either by then vice preside

this is not about jimmy carter. this is not about the shaw. this is a settling of scores among ourselves. and we want to push out the nationalists. we want to push out the leftists, which they did. i'm talking -- when i say we, i'm talking about the religious zeal zealots, the idealogues. very effectively, they used these events to crush all opposition and all doubting voices, and to monmonopolize po for themselves. they've done it how years. how long can they g o on? i won't predict. my own personal record of predicting events in iran isn't very good. the problem they have, of course, is that the same group of people who took power and consolidated power in '79 and '80, some of them are still the the there. they're alive and in power. >> we have a few minutes left. >> your caller's question is pertinent to today. one of the things i draw from the hostage crisis and this whole episode is that with the iranians, you can't simply negotiate without some force behind you. either the threat of military use, which we took off the table, or a real sa