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One day of perfect Kombucha, knitttng, 
quarantine eating. and knot-tytng, oh 
Featuring far _ too my! 13 ways to keep 

any eggs. your hands busy. 


Sandra doesn't get what everyone's so upset about. 

Prom Queen 


Bangers only, from ABBA to Z. Prom date edition. 

Dream Zine 

An illustrated guide to y'all's twisted minds. 



Natalie Dewhirst offers words of wisdom. 

zen steppes to Moscow 
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ssias! What fabulous c 

When did it start for you? 

For me, it was March 11. I had fled Pau, where 
it was still winter, for Lisbon, where it was 
70 degrees and sunny. At my hostel, I met a girl 
from Milan, and we drank sangria together elbow 
to elbow. "There's so many Italians here!" she 
remarked, as a group of four more walked in (just 
missing the national lockdown, as it turns out). 

On the train back, I coughed into my shoul- 
der and dabbed at my runny nose. Surrounded by 
people coming home from break, I was acutely 
conscious of the possibility that I was carrying 
the virus. I went home and have hardly left 

In that time, I have experienced loss and 
growth, creativity and hopelessness. You will 
find all of these conflicting emotions here. 

For our cover girl, there will be no senior 
prom, but there is a prom playlist. We're stuck 
inside, but hey, there's eggs in here. And as 
the Mouths" mom reminds us, plans fall apart, 

but we can keep dreaming anyway. 

Love and blessings, 



Quarantine Menu #1: Ciara 

10 am - TOO MANY EGGS 
on baguette tradition with butter and fried shallots 
accompanied by a homemade latte 

By the time the food is on the table its somehow 10 already. 
To make up for it, breakfast is elaborate: four soft-boiled eggs 
smashed over generously buttered baguette. The boulange- 
rie around the corner, is, of course, considered an essential busi- 
ness and still open during the quarantine. To drink, Bialetti-brewed 
coffee with foamed milk. Shallots avec make it healthy, right? 

3 pm - “The Cookies” 
aka Alison Roman’s chocolate chip shortbread 

Oops, | blinked and it's 3 pm. As my old landlady told me the other 
day, in quarantine, time passes surprisingly quickly. And as she also told 
me, with all the cooking everyone's doing, “on risque devenir enorme.” 

| finally got around to making “The Cookies,’ Alison Roman's 
famous chocolate chip shortbread. I’m going to be honest. The whole 
“cookie” thing didn't work out — the shortbread fell apart every time | 
tried slicing the log. On the bright side, that sandy mess made a deli- 
cious traybake. | ate it over FaceTime Catan. Fun was had by all. 

6 pm - Rosé lemonade, plain potato chips, and crudites 

One of the most surreal things about the quarantine is that, like 
in Camus’ La Peste, it began when the weather was fine. The sun is 
shining, we've turned the heaters off, and it feels like the perfect time 
to be sipping cold drinks outside. 

We may not be allowed outside, but we are still allowed to drink. 
Rosé with fresh lemon juice and sugar, garnished with a sprig of mint. 
Hell yeah. Plus snacks, because what's an apero without them? 

10:15 pm - Maiale al latte 
(milk-braised pork) 
with sauteed spinach and polenta 

| do not normally eat dinner at 10:15. | made a terrible, terrible 
mistake. To make a long, sad story short, | was overly optimistic about 
how long it would take to cook a large slab of pork to fork tenderness. 

When dinner was ready, it was, dare | say, worth it? Lemon peel, hot 
peppers, and milk curdle together in the oven to form orange, savory 
nuggets. One of the most funny-looking and delicious meals | have 
ever eaten. 



Quarantine Orafts 

1. SCOBY diving 

Fermentation: everybody's doing it! 
Kombucha is a fun, mildly-alcoholic fermen- 
ted drink, but to make it, first you need a 
SCOBY. Grow one at home from storebought 
kombucha. It's free real estate. 

2. Collage 

Do you remember being forced to make 
collages in middle school art class? It's a lot 
more fun when it's not for a grade. Cut up 
your junk mail and go to town. 

3. Turn plastic bags into yarn 

Yes, this is possible. Once you've knotted 
the plastic bags into yarn, you can crochet 
more plastic bags, which, confusingly, 
cannot then be turned into yarn. 

Fun fact: a craft is whatever you want 
it to be. 

4. Bury a time capsule 

Fill a box with memorobilia from this 
year and hide it somewhere safe. Be sure to 
prominently feature "2020: Year of Corona- 
virus’ on the inside lid so people from the 
future freak out when they open it. 

5. Make pulp out of cardboard 

By shredding old cardboard packaging, 
you can actually make paper from scra- 
tch. Possibly a good option if you run out of 
space in your journal and all the stores are 

6. Fold money into origan1 

Money, money, money. Enough worrying. 
Start folding. If you fold your entire stimulus 
check into paper cranes, you will be granted 
good luck for the rest of your life. 

7. Learn knot-tying 

Knot-tying, along with tire-changing and 
lock-picking, is one of those deeply impres- 
sive skills that doesn't take that much effort 
to learn. 

8. Make an RPG 

Using websites like RPG playground, 
you can easily make flash-based games in 
your browser. Bonus points for building your 
game from scratch. However that works. 

9. Sew PPE 

With thick cotton fabric, elastic, and a 
few basic stitches, you can make your own 
face mask. Make extra and hang them on a 
public ‘mask tree’ to share with neighbors. 

10. Publish an e-zine 

Podcasts are so early 2010s. Micropho- 
nes are sold out on Amazon anyway. Get 
creative another way by publishing a zine 



at this 

| Photo by 
@dvanzuijlekom on Flickr 

11. Troll an online forum 
Go on r/army and say you're from North Korea. Log in to Mumsnet and post about hating chil- 
dren. The possibilities are endless. 

12. Cook weird food 
Sure, you could bake chocolate chip cookies or banana bread. But consider this: cumin-spiced 
cheerio traybake. Pepper meringues. Gin and tonic pie. All we're saying is live a little. 

13. Wear a toga 
Fold that sheet into an elaborate garment fit for Roman nobility. Put on a flower crown. You are 
the quarantine queen. 


A piece of short fiction. 

For Sandra, life hadn't really changed much 
since the outbreak. 

When the virus began to spread, she was 
among the first to be quarantined because of 
her Chinese parents. A police officer refused to 
look her in the eyes or come closer than 6 feet 
when he came to give her the news. Her father, 
who owned a dry goods store, sent her boxes of 
masks and gloves. 

“Baba. | can't leave the house anyway. What 
am | going to do with this?” 
“Be safe, Sandra. Be safe.’ 

Her friends sent apologetic messages. It's 
so unfair, they said. You must be going crazy, 
cooped up in there, they said. 

She couldnt quite tell if they were being 
sincere. Since when was_ staying home 
something to avoid? She thought of Bethy, who 
hadnt shown up to brunch three weeks in a 
row, liking interior design posts on Instagram 
instead, and Anna, who had seen every Netflix 
Original there was, from Beasts of No Nation to 
Tall Girl. 

Well Sandra didnt feel the need to pretend. 
She liked being at home, listening to the air 
conditioner hum, feeling the sheets rustle 
against her bare legs. She liked going on her 
laptop. She liked working from her bedroom, 
plugging into her headset and reading from the 
customer service script. 

Asabilingualsupportspecialist, she‘dheard 
the panic of the outbreak ebb and flow. She 
worked for the Company that Sold Everything, 
and in the early months, when the virus was 

We Lived Happily 
During the Pandemic 

still the Chinese Virus, they were inundated 
with calls from Beijing, Guangzhou, Wuhan. 
Angry voices barked in Mandarin, insistent 
on securing their supply of toilet paper, 
packaged noodles, underwear, rolling 
papers. And face masks. Thanks dad, she 
thought, after one particularly heated call 
with a woman whose order of 500 face 
masks had never arrived, seized by the 
government in transit. 

Weeks passed. Officials welded the 
doors of Wuhan shut. The calls from China 
slowed, and the calls from everywhere else 

Normally, Sandra took almost 
exclusively calls in Mandarin, but as the 
outbreak spread and the phone lines 
flashed, she found herself switching from 
Mandarin to English and back again. 

“Hello, this is Sandra with the Company 
that Sells Everything, what's your name?” 

“Sandra. I've been waiting for 2 hours so 
please just cut the script and tell me where 
my order is. Order 188290.” Sandra paused. 
The customer sighed. “I’m Barbara.” 

The script did an admirable job getting 
the information needed to locate Barbara's 
order of 20 jars of peanut butter. The 
delivery man had left it by the complex 
driveway, trying to make his quota 12 
minutes before quitting time. 

One day there was some kind of glitch 
and she received international callers at 


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“Maharagwe yangu ni wapi?” 
“Pedi esta camiseta hace dos semanas.” 
“Qu'est-il arrive a mon streaming service?” 

Sandra could hear the panic in their voices, but not understanding what they said made her 
feel strangely calm as she told them, in English, that they would be transferred to a support 
specialist who spoke their language as soon as possible. 

Things calmed down. The outbreak continued, but the healthy stayed home, under penalty 
first of heavy fines, then imprisonment in filthy, overcrowded state containment centers. They 
soon adopted the same rhythm of life as Sandra: AC hum, laptop clack, food delivery, work 
from home. 

Of course people rebelled. Lovers snuck out to embrace in unwatched forests, scavengers 
risked arrest in abandoned warehouses to pick through VR headsets, stacks of graphics cards. 
In the news, Sandra read a headline: “Man hides in supermarket overnight, drinks champagne, 

But most didn't. Staying home was comfortable. Safe. Heroic, even, according to the 
message played on loudspeakers by passing police vehicles. Life went back to normal. Maybe 
they didn't realize how normal it was, until they were forced into it. 

The bell rang. Sandra logged off, opened the door, and retrieved her grocery box. Miso- 
glazed salmon with fresh asparagus. It had just turned spring, after all. She stood by the window 
and watched the Company delivery man rush to his van in the golden light of early sunset. Yes, 
she thought. Not much has changed. 

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Violet would have been attending her senior 
prom in April if it hadn't been for the 
pandemic. She spoke with Ciara about what 
it's like to graduate without a party. 

What was the proms theme going to be? 
Ooh. | actually dont remember. Either royalty or red 
carpet. | think it was red carpet? 

Were you going with a date? 

| was going with my friend Justin -- not as a date-date 
-- more a friend date. 

| don't think dates matter unless you're actually dating. 
Just match them and take good pictures. 

Were you going to match? 
| don't know because | didn't pick a prom dress. 

Did you get a refund? 

| did on two of the dresses, but there's another two or 
three | waited too long to return. 

| know girls who spent like $300 so | feel way worse for 

But a lot of people didn't buy any. When they kicked 
us out of school... For some reason prom didn't feel super 
real. People weren't excited for whatever reason. 

But prom hasn't even been canceled yet! Graduation is 
rescheduled for June at this point. 

I'm not keeping my hopes up. I'm not sure I'd even want 
to go, for the sake of my safety and my family's safety. 

Are you sad to be graduating without any of the rituals? 
Yeah, I'm a little bummed out, but it's not the end of the 
world. Honestly, | don't really want to be in school right now. 

Have you been keeping in touch with your support 

I've been talking to Rachel, my best friend, and texting 
some people. But like, in the summer, | ghost everyone. 
And it's kind of like the summer. 


Editor's note: Violet bought 
several dresses online, including 
the one pictured, intending’ to 
return all but one before the prom. 



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Grand Entrance: ‘Dancing Queen’ by ABBA 
Played out? Maybe. An unimpeachable banger that will make every 
17-year-old in the room feel special? Absolutely. 

The Song with Instructions: "Crank That’ by Soulja Boy 

There's something for everyone. The cool kids can unpeel themselves 
from the wall for some irony dancing. Actual talented people can dunk on 
them. Everyone can hurl themselves to the side on the “youuu. ' 

The ‘Oh My God That's My Song Song: ‘Juice’ by Lizzo 

Any respectable prom playlist needs to bring out the occasional big guns 
to send people running from the snack table to the dance floor. Lizzo's 
sparkly self-esteem anthem is our pick. 

Credits, Fade Out: "This Will Be Our Year" by Dear Nora 

The graduation tearjeaker genre has a lot of strong entries, from “In My 
Life" by the Beatles to "Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)" by Green Day. 
Dear Nora's cover of "This Will Be Our Year" by the Zombies is our choice 
because of its touching mix of youthful vocals, melancholy melody, and 
hopeful lyrics. 





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Choose your fighter! 





"I was, for amoment, a 
bird. Chasing an insect in a 
birdcage? Then I was me, holding 
the cage, but the bird was still 
there. I dropped the cage and 
held the bird as I fell through 
the sky. At first I thought, this 
ts really cool, I'm flying. 
But then I realized I was 

- Hannah, creative director 

"I was peeing in a bathroom 
staLl with a half-door. 
A Little girl was trying to get 
tn, and I was just trying to 
change without the whole bathroom 

seeing my boobs." 
- Violet, editor-in-chief 

"One cat riding another 
Like a Skateboard. “ 

- Ciara, editorial director 


The Mom of the Mouths On Achieving Your Dreams 

Design intern Natalie Dewhirst speaks with the Mouths (who happen to be 
her daughters) about living the dream vs. going with the flow. 

Natalie, youre a very accomplished woman. 
You have a home and a family, a dog. You achie- 
ved your dream job as a design intern at Mouths. 
How did you get here? 

You know, | credit it all to my amazing daugh- 
ters. | think the fact that you chose me for this 
position says a lot about our relationship. And 
that's the thing I'm most proud of. 

What were your earliest dreams, ma? 

| always thought | would be a teacher. | had 
a fourth grade teacher who would — back when 
we had chalkboards — roll her chalk between 
her hands when she was talking to us, but she 
had rings so it made this really cool sound. And 
| think that's why | wanted to be a teacher. 

| also wanted to be a farm store worker 
because | thought it was very magical when 
they went back into that refrigerator and got ice 

Grandma was like, you don't want to be a 
farm store worker. | was like, yes | do. 

Do you know what farm stores are? 


It's like a drive-up convenience store. They'd 
open a sliding glass door and say “what d’you 
need?” And youd say, “bread and milk and ice 
cream. And theyd go and bring it to us. You 
didn't have to get out of your car. 

So youre not a teacher today. Do you wish 
youd taken the teaching path? 

Sometimes, but | think it's one of those jobs 
that seems great, but is actually pretty terri- 
ble. | think most people who do it kind of hate 
it. Which should tell you something. Plus, it's 
low paid and | like to make more money. I'm all 
about that money. Chasin' the bag. 

At what point did your dream shift? 

| was going to college to be a teacher, and | 
was volunteering with your first grade teacher, 


I didn't know that. 

Yeah. And she sat down with me and said, 
“Okay, what do | need to say to you to convince 
you to not do this?” And | gotta say, it was like, 
whoa, maybe | don't want to do this. 

She was my favorite teacher! 

She was a great teacher and | think she 
actually really loved it, but she hated the 
bureaucracy and the red tape. 

What about the farm store? 
Hm, when did | give up on that? Probably 
grandma shamed me. When | was four! 

Are you happy with how your career has 

I'm more content with where | am now. 

| was never someone who was like, oh, 
I'm gonna get into marketing. But I've always 
been a ‘start a business’ kind of kid. Like | was 
the kid who was selling friendship bracelets, 
and then | was selling pants, and then dolls. 

That's what led me into web design and 
graphic design, because | had to have a 
website and | needed a catalog, which | just 
came across recently. You guys should look at 
it. It's absurd, so bad. 

But that's when | learned CorelDRAW which 
is kind of like InDesign. Or was it Quarkx- 
Press? It was whatever software your uncle 
would pirate for me because it used to be that 
software came on a disk, and you could copy 
the disk. Too easy. 

So | got into marketing just because that 
was the skill | gained through the business but 
| didn't really like it. | did that for a long time. 
Until this whole UX thing came up, which | 
actually really like. So, yeah, | guess I'm happy. 


Can you talk about what youre doing with 

UX stands for user experience. And user 
experience encompasses a lot, but the focus 
of my job is mostly research. 

Like I'm really involved in our mobile app 
redesign. I'm helping figure things out like ‘do 
people want to see their deductible first, or 
they want to see their benefits first?’ 

Sometimes, it's big projects like that. 
Sometimes it's little questions people want 
answered like, yesterday, | was working on 
whether people like vanity phone numbers, 
like 1-800-MATTRESS, or do they want to 
just see the numbers? So we did a little quick 
study on that. 

| get to pretend I'm a scientist in this job. 
So | get to have a hypothesis. And my hypo- 
thesis is that people will prefer the digits. 

Your dream is not exactly what you thou- 
ght it would be when you were young. Would 
you still say youve achieved your dreams? 

The mistake | made as a kid was that | 
didn't really have dreams. 

In a way, it's good, because there's nothing 
| haven't achieved. | didn't really think, ‘oh, by 
the time I'm 30 I'm gonna have all of this stuff. 

I've just been more of a ‘fly by the seat of 
my pants’ kind of person my whole life. Just 
like ‘take it as it comes. | don't really have a 
plan. That's changing as | get older, but that's 
definitely how | was when I was younger. 

| mean, clearly | didn't have a plan. | had 3 
kids by 25. | didn't think of the future. 

By the time | had my first then it became 
like, okay, I'm doing this. I'm having kids and 
being a mom. 

And having Ciara was the best decision | 
ever made. But it wasn't a decision necessa- 
rily. It was just what happened and then | went 
along for the ride, which is what | did a lot. But 
it's panned out. I'm pretty lucky. 

| think it's all about just making the next 
best decision. You can have a big plan but 
plans fail. 

You said you have been planning more for 
the future. So what what are your dreams for 
the future? What do you want for yourself? 

| want to have a farm— 

In Vermont? 

Maybe, but it's so cold there. You get 
snowed out. But | don't know if | care because 
| might become a hermit as | get older. 

| just want a quiet life. | want to go out 
in the morning and do a watercolor and tend 
my own little garden. | want to have some 

|| might want to be a college professor. But 
online so | dont have to be anywhere ‘cause | 
don't like to be anywhere if | don't have to be. 

So yeah, that's my big dream for the future. 

So does that mean PhD or...? 

| could teach the classes I'm taking right 
now with a master's. But I'm very interested in 
getting a PhD in behavioral psychology. 

| don't know. | just want to be Dr. Natalie. 

What have you learned from your dreams, 
whether or not you accomplished them throu- 
ghout your life? 

What I've learned is that when | want to do 
something, it happens. It just does. And | think 
| don't think that's unique to me. | think that's 

| also don't think it's magical thinking type 
of stuff, like the law of attraction. | think it's 
just that when you want to do something, 
you set in motion certain things that make it 
happen. My problem is that | just changed my 
mind too often. 

That's what I've learned about dreams: if 
youve got one, and you just start doing things 
that align with that, you're gonna get your 
dream. If you want it, you'll get there. 

Maybe not if you want something ridicu- 
lous. | don't know, this could backfire. Like 
if you want to be the first person to colonize 
Mars, that maybe wont happen.